


Monster In Me

by Simply4fun



Category: EXO (Band), SHINee, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Assassins & Hitmen, Assault, BadassSehun, Blood and Violence, Friends to Lovers, Gang Violence, Gangs, Gun Violence, Heavy Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Kidnapping, Love Triangles, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Mental Instability, Trust Issues, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-25
Updated: 2019-01-25
Packaged: 2019-10-16 01:38:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 48,785
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17540237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Simply4fun/pseuds/Simply4fun
Summary: Kai was dead.So who was this beautiful creature?And why did he look so much like Sehun's murdered ex-lover?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Posted as 'Dance with the Devil' on AFF
> 
> Can be read as a standalone or sequel. [Prequel](https://archiveofourown.org/works/17539751)
> 
> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)

“NOOOOOO!!”  
Sehun saw red.  
The assassin had lost the little control he had as his lover’s body crumpled. Bullets shot at rapid speed and lifeless bodies hit the concrete. The beast had been unleashed and one person who could stop him was lying in a pool on his own blood.  
Sehun was deaf to the screams of the people he slaughtered. He was blind to anything that wasn’t his target, his prey. He was numb to any feelings that didn’t fuel his anger.  
The demon was angry.  
So. Damn. Angry.  
To Sehun’s disappointment, the man who pulled the trigger fled before he could finish off the last worthless soul.  
Part of him wanted to go after the mafia lord, but then he heard his angel’s voice.  
“…Sehun…”  
~.~.~.~  
Sehun stared up at his ceiling, the gentle breeze of the fan cooling the sweat on his body.  
He sat up in his bed and ran a scared hand through his dark hair.  
After a moment of deep breaths, Sehun made his way to his bathroom, wearing only his boxer briefs. It was winter time but the man couldn’t sleep unless he was nearly naked and had a fan directly on him.  
Even though the gang member hardly got any sleep anyway these days  
Sehun looked at his reflection.  
It was obvious that he wasn’t sleeping well. The dark circles under his eyes were almost permanent.  
Sehun didn’t mind them though. At least now he looked as dead on the outside as he felt on the inside.  
It was the same routine every night. Sehun would dream about that day. Over and over again.  
As if some cruel being was afraid that he would somehow forget what happened all those years ago.  
Never.  
There was no way Sehun would forget. He couldn’t forget.  
He had to avenge Kai.  
The other would have wanted Sehun to get revenge.  
Sehun was sure of it.  
~.~.~.~  
Over the years Sehun had made his way up the ranks in the mafia world. He used to just be the one people would call when they wanted someone to do their dirty work. It was a known fact to the underground world that Sehun, or better known as simply ‘94’, was one of the most heartless cold blooded assassins around.  
Now, Sehun wasn’t just some random gunman that just anyone could call for. He was part of EXO, an elite group of people who monopolized most of the firearm companies as well as own varies smaller businesses.  
One never knew who EXO had keeping an eye on things, so for the most part crime in the city was at a minimal. The only people who stood up to EXO were dumb new people and members of the opposing mafia group, BTS.   
The men of BTS had no class. They killed for fun and thought nothing of it.  
In another life, Sehun would have fit perfectly in their gang. But in this life, BTS killed his angel. Their leader was the reason Kai was no longer at Sehun’s side.  
Sehun would kill them.  
All of them.  
The last dart hit directly on the bullseye when Sehun’s cell phone rang.  
“94.” He answered.  
“Ya, Sehun. When will you listen to me and answer the phone normally when I call. We’re friends, aren’t we?”  
“I don’t have friends, 7.”  
“Right.”  
Sehun rolled his eyes at the disappointment in his gang member’s voice. When will he learn?  
“Is there a reason you called me, Luhan.” Sehun didn’t care that his voice came off irritated.  
He was irritated.  
He hated human contact of any kind. Unless Sehun was shoving a knife down someone’s throat, or dislocating someone’s jaw, the Korean wanted nothing to do with the outside world.  
“Leader wants to see you.” Luhan finally spoke.  
“Understood.”  
“Se-“  
Sehun ended the call and shoved the phone in his front pocket.  
He pulled a leather jacket on and laced up his boots. He made his way to the weapon cabinet and put a handgun in his right back pocket and a small knife in his left one.  
Then he left.  
~.~.~.~  
Luhan was waiting for Sehun outside of their boss’ office. Sehun really didn’t understand why the Chinese even bothered. It was obvious that Sehun would never return his feelings.  
So why did the other still hung around the demon of a person. He would only get hurt, but Sehun didn’t care enough to try to prevent it.  
“7.” Sehun greeted.  
Luhan pressed his lips together and nodded his head slightly, “94.”  
“Boss is waiting for us.” Luhan spoke.  
Sehun rose a perfect eyebrow, “Us?”  
That was new. Sehun didn’t need a partner when he had a mission, that was understood. Especially if it involved killing. Sehun could murder a person blindfolded.  
“Yes, us.” Luhan turned away from his crush and knocked on the office door.  
“Come in, 7. 94.”  
Luhan opened the door and allowed Sehun to enter first.  
EXO’s leader, Kris, sat behind his desk.  
Sehun had a lot of respect for Kris.

He was strong and wise. He grew up in the mafia world and when his father died he took his spot. He made sure to earn his respect from his followers, too. He proved himself to be more than just some spoiled rich kid taking over daddy’s company. He was a great leader and Sehun knew he always did what was best for the group.

“I have an assignment for you both,” before Sehun even asked, “Yes, I do mean both of you. I think that this will work best if you two worked together.”

Luhan nodded, “Okay, what kind of assignment, boss?”

Kris rested his elbows on his desk and stared at his favorite subordinates.

Sehun was his ace. Everyone knew that. No one questioned that. There was literally nothing that Kris didn’t trust Sehun to complete perfectly. The man was so emotionless, Kris didn’t think he was capable of any human emotion. He felt no remorse for who he was assigned to killed. Whether it was man, woman, child, it was all the same for Sehun. A target was a target to the assassin, and Kris adored that about him.

Luhan was his hidden treasure. The small male didn’t look as deadly as Sehun, but oh was he. Luhan was used for more special occasions. He was good at manipulating a person’s mind, bending it to his will. Then when the moment was right, the assassin would break his target. There was no physical damage, so it was damn near impossible to trace anything back to the deer like male. A demon with the face of an angel.

Together, Kris could think of no better pair for this job.

“Rumor has it that BTS has their eyes on a new target. I don’t have much information about him, but if BTS wants him dead, then I want him alive,” Kris smirked, “I want you both to watch over him, the target that is. Luhan get close to him, become his friend, find out anything that could be useful. Sehun, no one is to harm the target. Eliminate anyone who dares to try. I believe in you two. Don’t disappoint me.”

Sehun and Luhan bowed, “Yes, boss.”

“You’re dismissed.” Kris turned his attention back to his laptop.

~.~.~.~

“Someone told me that someone from BTS was lurking around this coffee shop. Maybe the target is inside.”

Sehun eyes said coffee shop. Currently, he and Luhan were on the other side of the street, sitting at another cafe. Luhan was on his laptop trying to get as much information on their new target.

Sehun watched the bodies pass by the window. Everyone was the same. He didn’t even see faces anymore, just figures that came and went like cars.

“His name is Kim Jongin. He is 24. Just graduated college, dance major. Recently lived in France. I wonder what he’s doing here.” Luhan looked up and sighed when he noticed that Sehun wasn’t even listening to him.

Swallowing his heartbreak, Luhan closed his laptop and took a sip of his tea.

“What do you want our relationship to be?” came Sehun’s voice.

Luhan blinked, “I’m sorry?”

Sehun looked at Luhan, “Our relationship. How do we introduce ourselves to the target? Are we supposed to be lovers?”

Luhan nearly choked on his tea. Was Sehun really letting him choose? Luhan liked Sehun so much. So of course he would pick….

“Lovers.”

Sehun nodded and turned back to the window, “Understood.”

Luhan was blushing like crazy. He felt like he was going to explode from excitement. This was like a dream come true.

Sehun knew that Luhan was happy, not that his happiness was any of his concern. This was just part of the mission. Everything had to go according to plan. He couldn’t disappoint Kris.

He couldn’t disappoint Kai…

Sehun closed his eyes and his past lover’s face appeared in his mind. His smile was so beautiful. It took the assassins breath away. His eyes sparkled like diamonds, leaving Sehun’s heavy with pure adoration.

Then the image shifted to that angelic face covered in blood. So much blood.

Sehun’s eyes snapped open just as a figure stepped out of the coffee shop across the street.

First was a tall man, with large eyes and big ears. Sehun was about to turn his attention elsewhere when a second figure appeared.

This figure was a lot smaller than the first male. He wore a scarf around his neck and a cute white hat on his head, it was snowing after all. Whereas, Sehun wore the bare minimal, most people actually wanted to be warm in this type of weather.

For some reason Sehun couldn’t look away.

The taller of the two pulled the other into a hug, causing the small one to giggle.

The small one pushed the tall one back playfully and then spun around as the snow fell around him.

Sehun stood up abruptly, causing Luhan to jump.

“94, what is it?”

No answer.

Luhan’s eyes followed Sehun’s gaze to the couple outside. His eyes widened.

“Wait. Is that….?”

By the time Luhan looked up Sehun had already ran outside.

Fuck! Luhan thought.

Sehun stood and watched the small male twirl around, laughing.

It was like the whole world had stopped moving and there was only him. He was so beautiful, just as Sehun remembered him.

You dyed your hair? Blonde looks good on you…

Sehun made his way across the street, not caring to watch out for cars. Drivers honked and swore at him, but he didn’t care. If he had got hit and died, Sehun would be fine with that. At least he had seen his face.

One more time…

“Come here, you.” the taller of the two pulled the other back up against his chest and leaned in for a kiss.

Sehun blacked out.

When he came to, he heard screaming.

“What the hell are you doing?!”

Sehun looked down at his angel. Even when he was upset he was beautiful.

“Hey! Are you listening to me? Who are you and why did punch my boyfriend?!”

Ignoring the ridiculous question, Sehun pulled the angel up from the ground by his arm.

“What the he-”

Sehun placed both hands on each of the angel’s cheeks. The angel looked up at him, confusion in his eyes.

Why? Was he not happy to see him? Sehun was happy. He was so happy. He hasn’t felt happiness in such a long time. His angel has come back him. The gods must have heard his prayers after all.

The angel noticed that the stranger’s hand were shaking.

“Um. are you, okay?” 

Sehun inhaled sharply at the sound of his voice.

“Kai….”

The angel’s eyes widened and he suddenly looked sad.

He reached up and grabbed Sehun’s hands off his face.

“I’m sorry...I’m not who you think I am.”

Sehun cocked his head. What?

“My name is Jongin. Kim Jongin. Kai was my twin brother.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sehun vows to protect this angel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)

“My name is Jongin. Kim Jongin. Kai was my twin brother.”

Sehun’s eyebrows knitted together in confusion, “I don’t understand.”

His angel was back. After 3 years of praying to whatever higher being that would listen, Kai was back in Sehun’s presence, but now he was saying that he wasn’t Kai. Was this some sort of sick twisted game. That was cruel. Even for Kai.

Sehun grabbed the angel’s arm, “Kai, please. Don’t play with me. Not right now.”

The angel looked offended as he yanked his arm away, “What the hell is wrong with you? Didn’t you hear me. My name is Jongin. I’m not Kai.”

Not Kai?

If this angel wasn’t Kai then who was he?

And why….why did he look so much like Kai? Was Sehun being punished?

The angry angel turned and helped the tall man up off the ground.

Sehun simply stared at the two. What was going on? Who was this man and why was he hanging around his angel? Did he want to die?

“Are you okay, Chanyeol?” the angel asked softly, his hand reaching up to rub the blood from Chanyeol’s busted lip.

The fuck did Kai think he was doing?

Sehun was about to reach out and snatch up the angel again, but suddenly a small hand was intertwined with his.

“There you are, baby. Why did you run off like that?”

Sehun looked over at Luhan’s dazzling smile.

It was so beautiful. So fake.

‘The mission’ the deer-like beauty mouthed.

Right. The mission.

Sehun looked over at…Jongin? He looked so much like Kai.

Why….

“Umm, who are you?” Jongin asked.

Luhan put out a welcoming hand, “Luhan,”

Jongin looked hesitate but he shook the offered hand.

“I’m Jongin. This is my boyfriend, Chanyeol.”:

“Boyfriend?” Sehun growled.

Jongin looked back at Sehun, obviously confused on why Sehun had so much venom in his voice.

Luhan’s grip on Sehun’s hand tightened, “Oh that’s great. This is my boyfriend, Sehun.”

Jongin rose a perfect eyebrow, “He is your boyfriend?”

Luhan smiled sweetly and nodded.

If Jongin had any questions about it he kept them to himself because the next thing he did snatched Sehun’s breath away.

He smiled.

Using his free hand, Sehun pinched the bridge of his nose. He tried to calm the wave of emotions that was slowly drowning him. He hadn’t felt anything but pain and anger in so long. This warmth that Jongin was releasing was suffocating.

Luhan glanced at Sehun. He didn’t know what the other was doing, but he turned his attention back to Jongin.

“So, Jongin. You look so much like someone we use to know. Are you related”

Jongin nodded, “Yeah, Kai was my twin. He was older by like a minute but he took that to heart and always demanded that I called him hyung.”

Luhan let out a fake chuckle, “Cute. But Kai never mentioned he had a brother. Were you not close?”

Sehun also wanted to know.

He needed to know.

Because he thought he knew Kai better than anyone. So how did he not know that his lover of 2 years had a twin?

Jongin straightened his scarf a little, “We were close. But I was in university and just recently moved here from France.”

“And by recently he means like yesterday.” Chanyeol laughed.

Sehun almost forgot his existence. What a funny looking guy. Eyes and ears so big. What could Jongin possibly see in such a weird looking giant?

Jongin smiled, “Right. Really recent.”

“Oh wow. You went to university in France. That must have been expensive.” Luhan exclaimed.

Jongin blushed slightly at the comment and Sehun felt like his body was on fire.

“Actually, Kai, he umm…he paid my way through school. He would send me money every semester for tuition and other stuff.”

Sehun’s eyes widened at a memory he had of seeing Kai put money in an envelope from time to time. He must have been sending those letters to Jongin.  

“Oh, that’s so nice of him.” Luhan commented.

“Yeah, Kai was rich as hell. We don’t even know what he did for a living.” Chanyeol added, a stupid grin on his face.

Sehun really wanted to punch him.

“You didn’t know what Kai did for a living?” Luhan asked, just to clarify.

Jongin shook his head, “He never talk about it. Said it didn’t matter as long I was being taking care of. I didn’t want to fight him on it.”

Sehun saw a flash of sadness in Jongin’s eyes, but the male quickly covered it with a smile.

So much like Kai. Sehun always hated that Kai hid his feelings. Sehun was always the one having an emotional break down and Kai was always the one comforting him.

“What brings you back to Korea?”

“He got a job as a ballet teacher at the studio he used to dance at when he was younger,” Chanyeol answered proudly.

“You’re a dancer too?” Sehun spoke up.

Jongin looked at him with wide eyes. As if he was surprised the assassin could speak.

“Too? So you knew Kai well, huh?” Jongin smiled.

Oh, you have no idea…

“Yes. We were…good friends.”

Luhan was shocked. Sehun didn’t tell Jongin about Kai and his past. Why not?

“I’m glad. I didn’t know much about his life here in Korea. I’m glad to know he had friends.”

Jongin rubbed his eyes before the tears appeared and Sehun’s heart broke.

“Don’t cry, angel.”

All eyes were now on Sehun but Sehun could only see his angel.

He hated when his angel cried. It tore him apart. He wanted to stop his tears, more than anything.

“Umm…we should actually get going.” Luhan stepped in front of Sehun, breaking his sight of Jongin and forcing the killer out of his daze.

Sehun blinked back to reality and saw that he was being lead farther and farther away from Jongin.

“Nice meeting you, Jongin. You too, Chanyeol. Catch you around.” Luhan called back to the confused couple.

He dragged Sehun across the street and let him go once they were no longer in sight.

“What the hell was that, Sehun? That entire situation was fucked up. How are we supposed to get close to him now? The first thing you did was punch his boyfriend and then you started being all weird.”

Luhan was irritated. He was not going to let Sehun fuck up the mission.

“He looks like him.” was all Sehun said.

Luhan rolled his eyes, “Well of course he looks like him. They’re twins.”

“He looks just like him…”

Luhan clinched his fist, “Look if you can’t do this for whatever fucking reason. I’ll have Kris assign someone else to protect Jongin. But I can’t have y-.”

Luhan was cut off by the lack of air as his back was slammed up against the side of a building. Sehun’s hand was around his throat and the Chinese was dangling a few inches off the ground.

“He is mine to protect. No one else can protect him. Only me.” Sehun hissed.

Luhan’s hands clawed at Sehun’s thick veiny arm, but his grip didn’t lighten up.

“Sehun…” he gasped.

“No one else can save him. Only me.” Sehun said again, more to himself since Luhan was losing consciousness with every passing second.

Just when Luhan thought Sehun would truly kill him he was released and his body fell to the ground.

Taking in deep breaths, Luhan watched Sehun walk away.

“Crazy bastard.”

~.~.~.~

 

Jongin sat the last moving box on the dining table.

“That’s it.” He called to his boyfriend who was moving the TV into the living room.

Chanyeol sat the large flat screen on the tv stand with a soft grunt and turned to look at Jongin.

“Yeah, but now we have to unpack everything.”

Jongin groaned and flopped down on the couch, “Not tonight. I’m tired.”

Chanyeol chuckled and flopped down next to the dance teacher. He pulled Jongin’s legs into his lap and began softly massaging his calves.

Jongin moaned in pleasure, earning a large grin from the happy virus.

“You want to order chicken?” Chanyeol asked even though he already knew the answer. Jongin loved fried chicken. Sometimes he questioned if Jongin loved chicken more than him.

Jongin smiled and reached for his phone on the coffee table. He quickly dialed his favorite chicken delivery place and ordered their dinner.

“Done and done.”   

Chanyeol stretched a long arm over and pinched Jongin’s cheek, “Aigoo, you’re so cute.”

Jongin pull away playfully, “Stupid.”

Chanyeol smiled but then it faded as he thought about the day’s events.

“So today was weird, huh?”

Jongin twirled the charm on his phone, “Weird?”

“Yeah, at the coffee shop.”

Jongin looked up at his boyfriend and then back down at his phone.

“Yeah…”

To be honest, Jongin couldn’t stop thinking about the whole situation. It was bizarre, but even though he punched Chanyeol, Jongin especially couldn’t stop thinking about Sehun. Or maybe it was because he punched Chanyeol that the dancer couldn’t stop thinking about Sehun. He didn’t know. He was so confused.

How did he know Kai? What was their relationship? Sehun said that they were friends, but Jongin had a hard time believing that for some reason.

Maybe he didn’t want to believe it.

Sehun was…scary.

Jongin couldn’t help but feel like Sehun was staring right through his clothes and into his soul.

The man made Jongin uncomfortable to say the least.

But at the same time…

Don’t cry, angel.

What was that about?

Sehun was looking right at him, but the words didn’t feel like they were meant for him.

Kai…

Maybe those words were meant for Kai?

Groaning in frustration, Jongin got up and walked over to their balcony door.

“Hey, where are you going?” Chanyeol asked, concerned with the sudden change in his boyfriend’s mood.

“I need some air.” Jongin slid open the door.

“It’s snowing, baby. At least put on a coat.” Chanyeol tried.

“I won’t be long, relax”

Jongin closed the door behind him.

He tightened his cardigan around himself and looked up to the sky, the snow falling gently on his face.

“Hyung, I miss you…I thought that coming back to Korea would be good for me. But now I’m not so sure…I wish you were here with me. I could really use a hug right now.”

On the ground below was someone else who missed Kai.

Sehun had followed Jongin home and had been waiting outside his window for hours.

Just as easily as he found out where the dancer lived, he was sure someone from BTS had also followed him.

He had been right too.

After a while Sehun noticed a man lurking in the brushes.

Amateur.

Sehun quickly killed the gang member and had been poking holes in the dead man’s chest when Jongin emerged.

Now, Sehun was looking up at him.

Jongin wasn’t Kai, but to Sehun he was still an angel.

And angels needed to be protected.

Sehun couldn’t save Kai, but he would protect him.

He would protect Jongin.

“I won’t let you down, angel.”   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jongin is all Sehun can think about

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)

It's been 3 weeks since Jongin started teaching ballet at his old studio. The first few days were a little stressful. Trying to come up with a plan that wasn't too complicated for 5 year olds, but also fun and easy to learn.

Understanding how each of his students learned was also something Jongin took seriously. 

Not everyone absorbed information the same. Jongin had learned that throughout the years of his school own schooling. 

“Nini, can we dance a little longer?”

“Please, please, Nini.”

“Nini, you're so cool. Show us more.”

Jongin smiled down at his little angels. They were so cute. 

“Now, now, everyone. We will meet again tomorrow, okay? Make sure you practice well.” 

“Awww~” 

“I know. I know. I don't want it to end either, but Nini also has dance class to go to. You don't want Nini to become a bad dancer because he doesn't practice, right?” 

“No!” They shouted and Jongin couldn't help but smile. He loved his students very much. 

“Ok. Hurry and get ready to wait for your parents.” 

“Yes, Nini!”

~.~.~.~

Sehun was helpless. 

He couldn't ignore it. 

He couldn't stop it. 

He was weak. 

No matter how much he tried to deny it, it was there. 

Pain. 

Uncontrollable agony embedded itself in the demon’s chest, and Sehun was defenseless against it. It was slowly eating away at what little life that was left of the killer. 

And the cause of this constant feeling that he was struggling to find oxygen…

Sehun stood on the sidewalk in front of the local dance studio. 

It was snowing. 

It was like the snow never stopped. 

It didn't bother the assassin though. He was insensitive to the cold. And just about everything else too. 

That's what Sehun liked to believe at least. But the truth was that he found a new light. 

And it was so bright. 

Jongin waved as his last student walked away with her mom. 

He was smiling that heavenly smile that was too much for his inner demon. 

His beast wanted to reject Jongin.

So fucking badly. 

Kai was its master. Jongin was an imposter. 

But it just couldn't. 

Everything about Jongin was like Kai, yet at the same time they were completely different. 

It was fucking with Sehun's head. 

When he looked at Jongin he saw Kai, but then he remembered that Kai was gone. When he realized that, he saw Jongin as who he was:

Not Kai. 

To Sehun, there was Kai and then there was ‘Not Kai’. 

Kai was dead

Not Kai was alive. 

And Sehun vowed to keep ‘Not Kai’ alive. For Kris. For the mission. For Kai. 

Sehun came to the conclusion that Kai didn't want Jongin to know about his mafia life. Jongin was completely clueless to where the money came from for his schooling.

This must be how Kai had wanted it. 

If Kai wanted something Sehun would make it happen. That's how it always was. That's how it will still be. 

“You know if you keep staring at him like a psycho, he is going to suspect something.”

Sehun turned to look at his “boyfriend”. 

The idea of Luhan being his boyfriend...again, made the killer scoff, but he would endure it. For the mission. 

Honestly, Luhan hadn't been that bad of a boyfriend. If Sehun hadn't fallen so hard for Kai, maybe Sehun and Luhan would actually still be together. 

But Luhan was nothing compared to Kai. 

Nothing. 

Sehun didn't comment on Luhan's statement. Just started up toward the studio. 

Before Jongin noticed them, Luhan hurried and linked arms with Sehun. 

“Jongin, how are you?” The Chinese smiled. 

Sehun was semi amazed at Luhan's acting skills. 

From the outside looking in, Luhan was the sweetest person on Earth. So caring and understanding to those around him. 

He easily wound himself into Jongin’s heart. 

Sehun knew the truth through. 

Luhan didn't really like Jongin. Sehun could tell. 

Ever since he broke up with the smaller for Kai, Luhan had become bitter. Maybe he was heartbroken? Maybe he really loved Sehun? 

Sehun didn't care enough to dwell on the issue. It wasn't important to him at all how Luhan felt.

He never cared about how anyone felt. 

Except Kai and…

Jongin grinned, “I'm great, Luhan. Ready for class?” 

Luhan nodded. 

Luhan had joined the adult dance class the week before. Another reason to be close to the target. It was a pro that Luhan was actually a pretty good dancer too. 

Luhan unlinked arms with Sehun and linked up with Jongin as they made their way inside. 

Sehun silently followed behind the two dancers. 

Jongin turned his head to look back at the assassin. Eyes shining with curiosity. 

Sehun's stone heart began to crack a little. 

His light was so damn bright. 

~.~.~.~

Jongin and Luhan sat criss-crossed on the floor, waiting for their teacher to arrive.

He was really late. It's been 20 minutes since class was suppose to start and Jongin was actually pretty nervous. 

“Has teacher-nim replied to anyone's text yet?” Jongin asked the rest of his peers. 

Heads shook. 

Jongin sighed. 

Luhan touched his leg, “Don’t worry, Jongin. I'm sure he's just in traffic.” 

Jongin smiled at his friend. 

Luhan always knew what to say to make him feel better. 

“Yeah, you're probably right.” 

Jongin looked down at his phone when it suddenly buzzed. 

Yeollie: Hey baby. How's Dance going?   
Me: It’s not. Teacher hasn't shown up yet. :/   
Yeollie: That's strange.   
Me: I'm sure he's on his way.   
Yeollie: Okay, baby. Want me to pick you up?  
Me: Aren’t you working?   
Yeollie: Yes. But I will be done in time to come pick you up. The new guy isn't needed much in the precinct.   
Me: Did you get a car assigned to you yet?   
Yeollie: I did?  
Me: So my boyfriend's picking me up from dance class in his sexy police car?  
Yeollie: If that's what you want, silly.   
Me: Can’t wait. ;)

Luhan noticed the blush on Jongin's face. 

“Naughty text?” 

“Nooo,” Jongin screeched, earning a chuckle from  
Luhan. 

“Hey, no judgment.” 

Jongin thought about something. 

“Do you do it too, Hyung?”

Luhan rubbed his ankles, “Do what?”

“Text naughty sometimes…”

Luhan paused. 

“With Sehun…”

Luhan glanced at Jongin. The boy genuinely looked like he just wanted to know. 

Idiot. 

“Yeah. All the time,” he lied. 

“Oh…”was all Jongin said and Luhan decided to add

“Sehun can be such an….animal.” 

Now that wasn't a lie. 

~.~.~.~

Sehun walked around the studio, like he always did, until Luhan (well really Jongin) got done with class. 

He also noticed that the teacher had not arrived yet, but the assassin couldn't care less about it. 

Just like always, Sehun's mind wanders to Jongin. 

It was torture really. 

Thinking. 

Feeling. 

Wanting. 

Sehun never wanted to do any of those things again. He was better off being a heartless monster. 

You couldn't get hurt if you didn't care. 

After a few moments, Sehun noticed his surroundings. He had wandered to the other side of the studio. 

Just as he was about to turn and head back he noticed a familiar red liquid coming out from under one of the supply closets. 

Out of pure boredom, the assassin opened the closet, only half surprised to find the body of Jongin's dance teacher. 

He stepped aside as the body dropped to the floor. 

The corpse had multiple cut wounds on its face and on its body. Whoever did this was having fun with it. 

“AHHHHHHH!!!”

Sehun ignored the screaming girl in the hallway and ran back towards Jongin's class. 

Whoever did this wanted someone to find the body. They didn't even really try to hide it. They wanted attention. 

Sehun could only think of one group of people who would so openly murder a person. 

Not caring, Sehun kicked open the door to Jongin's class. 

The class jumped and looked wide eyed at the intruder. 

There was a man in the front of the class, standing. He looked at Sehun and smiled, but there was no real warmth bedhind that smile. 

“Sehun, what are you doing?” Luhan hissed. 

Sehun didn't even glance at his partner. His eyes were set on Jongin. 

It was clear that the dancer was scared and confused. The way he stared up at Sehun and the way his chest rose up and down, was obvious to the gang member. 

Jongin opened his mouth, “Sehun...wha-” 

“Now now, class. Let's get back to what I was saying.” The man standing up front interrupted. 

All eyes were back on the pink haired male. 

He bowed, “My name is Jimin and I'll be your new dance instructor.” 

Sehun and Jimin made eye contact and Jimin winked. 

BTS…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chanyeol doesn't like Sehun one bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)

Chanyeol was the first cop to arrive at the scene. 

He was just about to clock out when he heard the call. Even when the other officers told him that they would take care of it, the tall male insisted that he had to go too. 

Of course, he had to go. 

There was a homicide at his boyfriend’s dance studio, after all. 

“Jongin!” 

Chanyeol ran up and pulled the dancer into the tightest hug ever. He inhaled the smaller’s hair and sighed. 

He could calm down. 

Jongin was here. 

He was safe.

He was alive. 

Chanyeol looked down into Jongin’s eyes. They were red. He had been crying. Why wouldn’t he? His dancer teacher’s body was cut up and had been stored in the supply closet. 

Disgusting, Chanyeol thought. 

He had heard stories in the precinct about gangs being a common issue in the city. There were 2 major gangs that came up almost every day. 

BTS and EXO. 

Honestly, if Chanyeol had known that the city was actually more dangerous than it seemed, he would have never agreed to move back here. He wanted Jongin safe. When he heard about Kai’s death it sacred him. He didn’t know what he would do if something ever happened to Jongin. 

He would lose his mind. 

He rubbed the back of his hand along Jongin’s tearstained cheek, “Oh, baby. I’m so sorry.” 

Jongin nodded, trying his best to fight the tears that just wouldn’t stop falling. 

“Who would do something like this? Why?”   
“That’s what I’m here to find out. Don’t you worry.” Chanyeol turned his attention to the man who the caller described standing above the body. 

“Sehun.” 

Said man didn’t even look at the officer, “What?”

Chanyeol frowned. 

He never got a pleasant vibe from Sehun. He made the officer uneasy, which wasn’t a simple task with his line of work. Sehun was always around, but he never seemed to be quite there. As if he was somewhere else in his mind. What was he always thinking about? 

Chanyeol noticed Sehun’s eyes on Jongin. 

...Or who was he always thinking about? 

Chanyeol muscles began to tighten. He always assumed Sehun was around because Luhan was Jongin’s friend, but looking at him now, the way he looked at Jongin as if the dancer was something of his, Chanyeol began to second guess that.

Chanyeol glanced back at Jongin who eyes were still looking to the ground. So Jongin didn’t even notice Sehun’s gaze? Of course, he wouldn’t. Jongin was his, he knew the other would never look to anyone else. 

The officer cut his eyes at Sehun, “The caller described you standing near the body. Care to explain?” 

Jongin looked up, eyes wide. 

Still looking at Jongin he spoke, “I found it.” 

Chanyeol clinched his fist, “I would appreciate it if you looked at me when I’m talking to you. This is a serious matter.” 

“Well, it has nothing to do with me so I-” 

“Actually, I think it does. Why don’t you come down to the station so I can ask you a few questions?” Chanyeol didn’t try to hide the bitterness in his voice. Sehun was just too fucking arrogant and cocky. It really pissed him off. 

Jongin quickly looked at Chanyeol then back at Sehun. 

He touched his boyfriend’s arm, “Chanyeol, what are you doing?” 

“My job.” 

Jongin noticed the way Chanyeol was staring at Sehun. He had never seen so much hate in his boyfriend’s eyes before. 

Chanyeol started toward Sehun, reaching for his handcuffs. 

“Wait! Chanyeol, stop,” Luhan ran over and stood in front of the officer, “Sehun didn’t do anything.” 

Chanyeol moved the small male aside, “Then he won’t have a problem coming to the station to answer a few questions then.” 

Luhan watched as Sehun tensed up. 

Bad. 

This was bad. Sehun never took kindly to threats. This could only end badly…

For Chanyeol…

“Turn around and face to the wall, please,” Chanyeol ordered. 

“No.” the assassin replied. 

“No? Are you stupid? A police officer is giving you an order. Now turn and face the wall. I don’t want this to get ugly” 

Sehun smirked, “The only person this will get ugly for is 6 foot will stupid big ears.”

Chanyeol all but growled, “Why you-” 

“Yeollie! Stop it!” Jongin screamed. 

The dancer marched up to his boyfriend and placed himself between the two men. 

“I don’t understand why you need to take Sehun to the station, but if you must then you could at least be a little nicer.” 

Chanyeol looked from his boyfriend over to Sehun who was smiling. 

He hated him! 

Jongin then turned to Sehun and smiled. That surprised the killer.

“Sehun, I know you had nothing to do with this. You’re not that type of person...” 

But he was.

“You wouldn't kill anyone...”

But he has. 

“You’re a good person.” 

He was a devil actually. 

Sehun couldn’t take his eyes off of Jongin. It was like he was frozen, he could barely even breath. Jongin was all he could see. Everyone else had disappeared and there was only the two of him. 

Jongin smiled and reached out and gently touched Sehun’s arm, “But it would be best if you went with Chanyeol quietly. I don’t want anyone to get hurt.” 

He didn’t want anyone to get hurt? 

Even him? 

Why? 

Why did he care? 

Even so…

“Fine,”

Sehun looked at Jimin, who seemed amused by the whole situation, “Luhan, make sure 

Jongin grinned and Sehun felt like his chest would explode. It hurt, but he loved the feeling.   
Jongin gets home safely.” 

Jongin’s heart began to pound faster, “Thank you, Sehun.” 

Chanyeol was livid. 

Why the hell did Jongin get onto him yet praise that lowly man? It made his blood boiled. 

When more officers finally arrived Chanyeol waved them over to take Sehun away. 

He tried and failed to ignore the way Jongin looked at Sehun. 

He was officially in competition for his boyfriend’s attention  
~.~.~.~

Jongin couldn’t stop thinking about Sehun. 

He tried. He really did try to not think about his friend’s boyfriend, but every time he closed his eyes, Sehun’s face was there. Waiting for him. Haunting him. 

He wasn’t paying attention to the movie Chanyeol had put on, even though it was one of his favorite movies. 

Chanyeol noticed as well. 

He paused the movie, “What are you thinking about?” 

Jongin shook his head, “Nothing.” 

He obviously shouldn’t tell his boyfriend that he was thinking about another tall dark and handsome man. 

“”Okay...I won’t force you to tell me. I just want you to know that I’m here if you want to talk...you know...about your teacher.” 

Right. 

Jongin should be morning. His dance teacher had been murdered. And the police still didn't have a culprit. 

But here he was..thinking about Sehun. 

He was the worst. 

Jongin smiled, “Thanks, baby.” 

Chanyeol held out his arms, inviting the smaller to come and snuggle. 

Jongin was more than willing to. 

Chanyeol smiled and rested his head atop of Jongin’s head,

And then.

“I think Sehun likes you.” 

Jongin quickly sat back up and looked at Chanyeol. His face was hard to read. 

“What?” 

Chanyeol placed a hand on Jongin’s cheek, “I think he likes you and I don’t want you around him anymore.” 

Jongin laid his head back on Chanyeol’s chest and sighed, “You’re being silly, Yeollie. Sehun is with Luhan. He doesn’t like me.” 

Chanyeol took in a deep breath, “I’m serious, Nini. I don’t like the guy.” 

Jongin sat back up, “You don’t even know him.” 

He was offended by Chanyeol’s statement and he didn’t understand why that was. 

“Neither do you.” the police officer countered. 

Jongin was starting to get upset, “I know him better than you.” 

“Why are you getting so upset?” Chanyeol raised his voice causing Jongin to get even more defensive. 

“He is my friend and you’re telling me that I can’t see him anymore.” 

“He isn’t your friend, Jongin. He is just some cocky lowlife who only causes trouble. You’re better off not knowing him” 

Jongin saw red.

“How dare you!” Jongin shot up off the couch and grabbed his coat off the coat rack. 

“Where are you going?” Chanyeol called. 

“Taemin’s! I’m spending the night there.” 

Jongin slammed the door before Chanyeol could say another word. 

~.~.~.~

Jongin decided to walk to his friend's house. 

He had already texted his friend and informed him of the situation. Taemin was more than understanding. He always had been. Taemin was a childhood friend. Jongin and Kai use to play with him and they all attended dance classes together. 

Jongin thought about Chanyeol’s words.

How could he say those things about Sehun? 

How? 

“Where are you going, angel?” 

Jongin froze. 

Slowly he turned around, “Sehun.” 

Sehun stepped toward Jongin, unknowingly making it harder and harder for the dancer to breath. 

“You and Big Ears have a little fight?” 

“His name is Chanyeol and yes we did. How did you know?” Jongin tried not to stare, but Sehun was just so damn tempting. The way he walked, the way he talked, the way he looked. Everything about the man lured Jongin in. 

“I know a lot about you.” 

Jongin’s chest burned, “Like what?’ 

Sehun smirked when he stopped directly in front of the dancer. 

He reached up and touched the bits of Kai’s hair that was sticking out from under his beanie.

“I know...that you spend hours in the mirror trying to get your hair perfect only for your students to ruffle it and mess it all up.” 

Sehun moved his hand down to side of Jongin’s eye. 

“I know that you need glasses, but don’t like how they look on you. You think they make you ugly.” 

His hand moved down to his mouth and Jongin gulped. Sehun was so close. This was dangerous. 

“I know that you lick your lips when you’re contemplating something or when you're nervous.” 

Sehun ran a thumb over Jongin’s thick pouty lips and Jongin felt like his skin was on fire. 

He wanted to touch Sehun too. So badly. Too badly. 

But he shouldn’t. 

“How do you know all of that?” Jongin finally breathed. 

“I make it my business to know everything about you.” 

“Why?” 

Sehun didn’t answer. Just continued to trail his thumb along Jongin’s mouth, 

“Do you...do you like me?” 

Sehun paused his motions. 

Jongin felt like it was an eternity before he got an answer. 

“No.” 

Jongin felt something in his chest break. But maybe he was mistaken. Because he shouldn’t want Sehun to like him. He had Chanyeol and Sehun was with Luhan. 

“Ok, good. Well I’ll see you around.” Jongin tried to turn away before his disappointment showed on his face. 

Sehun grabbed his arm before he could get away. 

“I need you.” 

Jongin stared up into Sehun’s eyes, “Huh?”

Sehun pulled Jongin closer, “I don’t like you, but I need you.” 

“Sehun…” 

“I need you so fucking much.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Past relationships are discovered

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)

“So, he said he needs you? What did he mean? Sounds like a confession to me, Nini.”

Jongin sighed and stared up at the ceiling.’

He had made it to Taemin’s and was currently laying in the bed with his best friend. Sehun had walked him all the way there and then left without a word. What the heck? How can someone say something so meaningful and then just leave as nothing happened? Jongin didn’t speak up either, but he was just so confused. He was speechless.

“No, it’s not a confession, Tae. He said he didn’t like me, remember?”

Taemin rolled over and rested his head on his hand, elbow on the bed, “I remember, but it doesn’t make sense. He doesn’t like you, but he needs you? What does he even mean? I would have told him to explain if I were you.”

“I know, I know. I should have said something, but I just couldn’t. I didn’t know what to say. It was like my mind went blank. I could only follow him when he started walking.”

“Sounds like you want him to like you, Nini.”

Jongin’s eyes widened and he looked over at his friend, “No! That’s crazy. Why would I want Sehun to like me? I don’t even know him. I’m with Chanyeol too. No matter what happens between us, I love Yeollie. I don’t want to cause unnecessary problems.”

“Then why are you here with me then?” Taemin stated.

“Huh?”

“Why are you here, Nini? Why did you leave your home this late?”

“I told you. We had a fight.”

“About what? Because when you guys usually fight, you make up so fast its crazy sometimes. What was different about this fight?”

Jongin didn’t answer.

He and Chanyeol had fought about Sehun. To be honest, Jongin knew he was being unreasonable. He shouldn’t have gotten as upset as he did. But he couldn’t help it.

Sehun.

Even when he wasn’t around, the latter weighed on the dancer’s mind heavy. Too heavy. It was overbearing to say the least.

How could someone whom he barely knew make him feel so much?

Who was Oh Sehun?

~.~.~.~

Sehun sat at the park across the street from Taemin’s apartment.

He played with his hand knife as he thought about a certain dancer.

A certain blonde dancer.

He slowly, but surely, began to see Jongin as Jongin. He still couldn’t help but unconsciously compare his angel to his…light?

Yeah, Jongin was his light.

Hopefully, if he followed the light it would lead him to a small bit of happiness at the end of the dark tunnel.

Maybe, just maybe, this light would lead him to Kai.

That was Sehun’s silent prayer. He missed Kai so fucking much, it hurt.

It still fucking hurt so much.

His angel.

He needed to find his angel again. Maybe that is why Jongin appeared before him. To show him the way.

Sehun launched his knife toward to the intruder.

The stranger caught the knife and chuckled, “Impressive.”

Sehun finally looked up, “Same for you.”

Jimin slowly approached the sitting assassin, that devious smirk never leaving his soft face.

“He sure is beautiful, huh?”

Sehun’s jaw clenched and his muscles tightened, “If you know what’s best for you, you would find a new target.”

Jimin crossed his arms and looked up at Taemin’s apartment. The light was on, indicating that the two dancers have yet to fall asleep.

“Sorry. Can’t. I have my orders. Just like you have yours.”

“You know me or something?” Sehun questioned.

“Of course. Who doesn’t know the Ice Prince? The Beast. The Silent Devil. 94. You have many names, but my personal favorite….Kai’s Dog.”

The punch sent Jimin flying.

“I’m going to fucking kill you!” Sehun growled.

Jimin picked himself off the cold ground, spitting the blood out on the white snow.

He smiled, “Down, boy. You think I was dumb enough to come here alone.”

Sehun followed Jimin’s eyes back to Taemin’s apartment window.

To the assassin’s displeasure, a red dot followed the shadows inside

A sniper.

Sehun growled as he quickly pulled out his handgun and aimed it at Jimin.

“I’ll kill you. I swear to god I will.” He warned, his voice laced with venom.

Jimin began to circle Sehun, “Oh, I believe you, 94. But the moment you pull the trigger your precious Jongin is dead.”

Sehun’s heartbeat was abusing his chest. His blood had run cold. His finger hesitated over the trigger.

The killer had never felt this emotion before. What was it?

He involuntarily glanced up at the apartment window.

It was open now, and Jongin was standing there, completely unaware that his life was in danger. The red dot hovered over his chest and Sehun felt like pins were stabbing his heart.

Without further thought, the assassin threw his gun down on the snow.

Jimin smirked, “That’s a good boy,”

With the wave of Jimin’s hand, the red dot disappeared from Jongin body and Sehun felt like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders.

“Looks like some things never change,” Jimin started walking away, “We’ll catch up another time, doggie boy.”

When Jimin was out of sight, Sehun fell to his knees.

He brought his hand to his chest. His heart was still slamming against his ribcage uncontrollably.

This new feeling…Sehun knew what it was now.

Fear.

~.~.~.~

Jongin missed his students.

They had closed the dance studio until they found whoever killed his dance teacher. So, now the dancer was jobless.

It wasn’t like he needed to work, Chanyeol made more than enough money for them to live comfortably. Even so, Jongin wanted to feel like he was contributing.

He sat at his computer and searched Google for part time jobs in his area. Various things came up. Dog walker. Babysitter. Delivery Boy. Bridal shop clerk.

After an hour of looking, Jongin decided that the bridal shop job made more sense for now. He sent his resume and closed his laptop.

Chanyeol was at work, so the dancer was home alone.

After their most recent fight, the couple tried to avoid talking about Sehun. Not wanting to cause issues, both men stayed away from the topic. Chanyeol was still set on Sehun liking Jongin, however, but he didn’t want his boyfriend running off again.

And Jongin still didn’t understand this new protective feeling he had toward to the mysterious human.

Bringing his teacup with him, the dancer made his way to the living room.

He flicked through the channels on the television for a moment before settling on the news.

There had been another murder last night.

Jongin shook his head. He had no idea that murder was such a common thing here. It was like an every other day occurrence.  

How did Kai stand living here?

Was he not afraid?

Jongin smiled along the edges on the teacup.

Kai had always been the braver of the twins. It was like nothing scared the male. Jongin couldn’t help but admire the older for it.

Jongin’s eyes went back to the television, just in time to see a familiar face in the background.

He jumped, his tea spilling over onto his hand.

“Fuck!” he screamed, but his eyes were still glued to the TV.

Sehun.

Jongin may have needed glasses, but there was no mistaken the tall dark and…

Handsome.

It was Sehun for sure.

Before Jongin even realized what he was doing, he was putting on his coat and running out the door.

~.~.~.~

Chanyeol sighed as he looked over the fresh corpse.

“Damn shame, huh?”

The officer looked over at the owner on the new voice.

Pretty…was an understatement.

The stranger was wearing a long brown trench coat, black leather gloves that matched the black eyeliner surrounding his colored contacts.

Who…?

“I’m Byun Baekhyun, the new chief of police.” The smaller held out his hand.

Chanyeol shook it, “Oh, I heard we were getting a new one. Welcome. I’m Park Chanyeol.”

Baekhyun smiled, “Nice to meet you. So, what do we have here?”

Chanyeol tore his eyes away from his new boss and back down to the dead, “Homicide…again.”

Baekhyun glanced at the taller, “You sound disappointed.”

“Yeah, it’s just…everyday…”

Baekhyun placed a reassuring hand on Chanyeol’s arm, “I know. That’s what I’m here for. We will bring an end to all the killing, Park. I promise.”

Even though Chanyeol has heard that statement before, over and over again.

This time, he believed it.

~.~.~.~

Jongin slipped passed the people crowded around the scene.

He didn’t even know if Sehun was still there, but he couldn’t turn back now.

What was Sehun doing here? Was he just curious like everyone else? Did he live around here?

So many questions filled the dancer’s mind.

He hated that he had so many questions because that just proved how much he didn’t know about Sehun.

After 10 minutes of searching, he still didn’t find Sehun.

“Park! Over here!”

“Coming!”

Jongin froze.

That was Chanyeol’s voice.

Shit!

Of course, Chanyeol was here. He was a police officer for crying out loud. Jongin was stupid to not have thought about that.

Jongin watched his boyfriend make his way to his coworker.

He had to get out of here.

Chanyeol would kill him if he caught him lurking around a crime scene.

Jongin pushed his way back through the crowd, further and further away from where Chanyeol was.

He suddenly felt a hand grab his arm.

His scream was caught in his throat as he was yanked up against a rock-hard chest.

“What the hell are you doing?” came the dark voice.

Jongin blinked up at the other male, “Sehun.”

Sehun rolled his eyes, “Answer me.”

Jongin’s brain was struggling to form coherent sentences. He was pressed against Sehun’s body and the latter smelled so fucking good.

“Jongin, answer me.”

A cold chill ran down the dancer’s back at the command, “I…um…looking…you.”

Sehun looked at him with confusion in his eyes and Jongin knew he hadn’t said what he was thinking.

Sighing, Sehun turned away and pulled Jongin along.

“You shouldn’t be here, Jongin.”

Jongin couldn’t think about anything except how he loved the way his name sounded coming from Sehun’s lips.

It wasn’t long before they stood before an apartment building not too far from where the murder happened.

“Do you…live here?” Jongin asked.

“Yeah, come on.”

Jongin followed Sehun inside the building and up to his flat.

When inside, Jongin looked around.

Empty.

That was the first word that came to the dancer’s mind.

Sehun’s apartment was cold too. Did he not believe in heat? Jongin could literally see his breath.

Sehun must have noticed because he went over to the thermostat and turned on the heat.

“Sorry, it should warm up soon. You want some tea?”

Jongin nodded and watched Sehun disappear into the kitchen.

The dancer, ignoring that small voice in the back of his mind that opposed, started looking around the small flat.

He couldn’t help his curiosity. He wanted to know Sehun. You could learn a lot about a person from their home.

Home.

For some reason, Jongin didn’t get a homey feeling from Sehun’s place.

There was no color, just black, and grey.

No pictures hanging up or laying anywhere.

The only furniture in the living area was a single chair and a coffee table.

So lonely…

Jongin made his way toward the coffee table. On top of it was a book and an ashtray.

So, Sehun smoked.

He opened the table drawer to find various papers, cigarette buds, and a gun…

Jongin’s eyes widened at the firearm.

He had never seen a gun up close before. Chanyeol kept his out of sight and locked away. He never wanted Jongin to see something so dangerous.

The dancer slowly reached out toward the slick metal. Before he could touch it, he noticed a picture sticking out from under it.

He moved the gun and picked up the photo.

His hands began to shake as he stared at the couple in the picture. It was a selfie that had been printed out. In the back was Sehun. His arms were crossed over his chest, but he did not look intimidating at all. He looked amused.

Jongin didn’t think could have an expression on his face that wasn’t annoyed or threatening. It was pleasant to see.

The person who took the selfie was…beautiful.

Happy.

Familiar.

Family.

Kai.

The sound of glass shattering made Jongin jump.

He spun around to find Sehun staring at him with so much anger in his eyes.

It almost broke Jongin’s heart.

“What the fuck are you doing?”

Jongin looked down at the picture in his hands, “Kai…you…”

Sehun marched up and grabbed Jongin’s arm harshly, “I asked you a question. What the hell do you think you are doing?”

Against his will, tears began to form in the dancer’s eyes.

“You and Kai…were…”

Sehun growled and turned away from the crying male. His fist were clenched so tight his knuckles were turning white.

“Sehun…were you and Kai…,” the words seemed to not want to come out.

“Yes,” Sehun answered after what felt like forever, “We were…lovers.”

Jongin could honestly say he had never felt so much pain in his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jongin is too bright for Sehun to comprehend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)

“Sehun....I…didn’t know…”

Sehun sighed, “Why would you have known?”

Jongin flinched at the bitterness in Sehun’s voice. It was obvious that the paler male was hurting, so why did he sound so angry?

“I mean, Kai never…”Jongin stopped. He didn’t want to say anything that would upset Sehun. He didn’t know anything about their relationship.

Honestly, Kai had never mentioned that he even had a boyfriend. Jongin didn’t understand. Why didn’t Kai ever say anything to him? Why did he hide his relationship with Sehun? Jongin would have loved to meet anyone that Kai thought was special. Kai should have known that.

“Guess I’m not the only one that was left in the dark,” Sehun mumbled.

Jongin cocked his head, “Huh?”

Sehun turned toward the mess on the floor and began picking up the broken pieces.

“Kai never told me about you either.”

“Oh.”

Sehun let out a sour chuckle, “Two years and I didn’t know my boyfriend had a brother. A fucking twin. What else didn’t I know?”  

Jongin noticed how rough Sehun was picking up the broken glass, “Seh-.”

“We promised to tell each other everything. There was nothing I didn’t tell him. All my secrets, my past, about my m-.”

Sehun froze when Jongin was suddenly knelt in front of him, holding his wrist.

“Wha-.”

Jongin spoke softly, “You’re bleeding.”

Sehun looked down at the small cuts in his hand from how harshly he had been clenching the shattered teacup.

“I’m fine.”

Jongin shook his head, “Come here. Let me help you.”

The dancer rose to his feet, Sehun’s wrist still in his delicate hands.

From his knees, Sehun looked up at the beautiful creature.

Why was he being punished? Why did God hate him so much? Jongin was so painfully bright. Sehun couldn’t understand it.

“Let me help you,” Jongin repeated.

Right.

He hadn’t moved.

Sehun stood and allowed Jongin to lead him to the kitchen.

The dancer turned on the warm water and pulled Sehun’s hand under the faucet.

The assassin didn’t even notice the stinging sensation.

All he could feel was Jongin’s fingers rubbing along Sehun’s palm, rinsing the blood. He could feel Jongin’s body slightly brushing up against his. He could feel his heart began to swell at the sight of someone tending to the wounds he would always ignore.

No.

Not again.

He can’t.

Sehun snatched his hand away, ignoring the confused look on Jongin’s face.  

He can’t.

“Sehun…”

He fucking can’t.

“I got it.”

Jongin wanted to say something but Sehun already turned away from him.

He watched Sehun fumbled around in one of the kitchen drawers until he found some bandage wraps. Holding part of the medical equipment in his mouth, Sehun wrapped his wounded hand perfectly.

Too perfect.

Did he do this often?

Jongin didn’t like the idea.

The dancer rubbed his arm, feeling the tension suddenly between them.

What should he say?

He was never good with words.

“Um..I’m sure Kai had his reasons for not telling us about each other.”

Sehun just stared and Jongin felt like he was giving a speech in front of a million people.

“You think so?” Sehun finally asked.

Jongin gave a small smile and nodded, “Of course. You know Kai. He always believed he knew best. So, let’s just trust that he had a good reason and be happy that we crossed paths and that we can be friends now.”

“Friends?”

His laugh was just like Kai’s, “Yes, silly. Friends. You have friends, don’t you?”

“No. I only had Kai.”

Jongin’s smile faded. He wasn’t expecting an answer. Especially one that…sad. Why did Kai not tell him about Sehun? Jongin, deep down, still wanted to know.

“Well,” the blonde smiled again, “I’m your friend now. So, whenever you need someone, I’m here for you, okay?”

Sehun blinked at his new ‘friend’

I’m here for you.

~.~.~.~

Jongin had ended up spending the rest of the day at Sehun’s.

It was so nice listening to Sehun talk about his relationship with Kai. The way the taller male lit up when he said Kai’s name was precious. To know that Kai had someone looking out for him and taking care of him while he was in Korea made the younger twin so happy.

“You really loved him, huh?” Jongin suddenly asked.

Sehun paused for a moment. As if he needed time to get back to reality.

“Yeah…I still love him.”

Jongin smiled, “Me too.”

Sehun looked up into Jongin’s shining eyes. He could tell that the dancer was being completely honest.

Sehun’s chest began to get that warm feeling again.

He can’t.

The assassin stood up from his chair, “You should go.”

Jongin, who had been sitting across from Sehun on the coffee table, was confused in Sehun’s sudden change in tone, but he stood up too.

“Are you okay?”

Sehun ran a hand through his hair as he picked up Jongin’s coat off the kitchen isle.

“Yeah, it’s just getting late.”

Jongin decided to look pass the tension in his new friend’s, just this once.

“Okay. I’ll go.”

The dancer grabbed his coat from Sehun and slipped it on. Then he wrapped his scarf around his neck and put on his gloves. He turned to Sehun, who was looking to the floor for some reason.

“Hey…,” Sehun looked up and Jongin continued, “I had fun. We should do this again sometime.”

Sehun blinked at the beauty that was Jongin, “I’ll walk with you.”

Jongin shook his head, “No, like you said, it’s late. I’ll take a taxi.”

Sehun nodded even though he had no intention on letting the dancer go alone. He would wait a couple of minutes and then follow him.

The blonde smiled and put his shoes on before opening the door.

“Bye, Sehun.”

Sehun’s chest tightened, “Bye…Jongin.”

The assassin let out a heavy sigh when the door closed.

Jongin was breathtaking. He literally sucked up all the oxygen in the room, leaving Sehun struggling to breathe.

After a few moments of calming himself, Sehun slipped on his jacket.

There was a knock at his door.

Allowing a semi-smile on his face, Sehun opened, “Did you forg-.”

“You know, coming over to find another man leaving your boyfriend’s apartment is a little concerning.”

Sehun frowned, “What are you doing here?”

Luhan crossed his arms, “Well don’t sound so happy to see me.”

“I don’t have time for this, 7. I have to-.”

“What? Stalk Jongin? Don’t worry, he is fine. I saw him get into a taxi.”

Sehun turned away from his ‘boyfriend’ and the Chinese decided to let himself in.

He closed the door, “Sehun, I don’t know what you think you’re doing. But don’t get so close to Jongin. No good will come of it.”

Luhan watched Sehun, waiting for some sort of reaction to his words.

But all Sehun did was stare at his coffee table.

Luhan sighed and got closer to the killer human, “Do you understand what I’m telling you, Sehun?”

“Why?”

Luhan was confused, “Why….?”

The hitman’s eyes never left the coffee table where Jongin had just been. He could still see the dancer sitting there, legs crossed Indian -style, laughing at the stories he told about Kai.

The vision refused to fade.

“Why can’t you leave me alone?”

Luhan didn’t answer.

Because he knew that question was not meant for him.

~.~.~.~

Chanyeol glanced at the door when he heard keys jingling.

He came back.

The officer was shocked to come home to an empty house when he got off work. He just knew that Jongin would be there, waiting for him, but he was wrong. The dancer was gone.

Chanyeol had ordered chicken for dinner, but as the hours went by and Jongin still had not returned the policeman in him began to worry.

Where could the smaller have gone? He didn’t have many friends that he could be with. Honestly, Chanyeol only knew two of Jongin’s friends and that was Taemin and Luhan. When Chanyeol had texted Taemin, the other had said he hadn’t spoken to Jongin all day.

So, was Jongin with Luhan?

If he was with Luhan did that mean he was with Sehun too?

Chanyeol stood up when Jongin entered their apartment.

“Where have you been?”

The wide-eyed man couldn’t even pretend that he was fine. He was so protective of the smaller. More than he even realized.

Jongin was caught off guard by the tone of his boyfriend’s voice, “I was with a friend.”

Chanyeol followed Jongin to their bedroom, “Luhan?”

Jongin paused in the middle of getting undressed, “Sehun.”

Chanyeol’s jaw clenched, “And Luhan?”

Nude, Jongin looked at Chanyeol, “No…I haven’t seen Luhan today. What’s the matter?”

Did Jongin really not see the problem?

The officer sighed, he could not risk losing his cool with the dancer, “Nini, look. I don’t want to fight with you. But I thought I made it clear about how I felt about Sehun.”

Jongin smiled and Chanyeol was puzzled.

The dancer walked up to him and Chanyeol had to try so hard not the be hypnotized by that beautiful naked body of Jongin’s.

Sometimes the blonde was too damn gorgeous for his own good.

He wrapped his arms around Chanyeol’s neck, “Yeollie, you have absolutely nothing to worry about.”

“But he –.”

“Is in love with Kai.”

Chanyeol’s eyes became even wider, “Huh?”

“Sehun and Kai were lovers, Yeollie.”

Oh.

Jongin kissed the taller’s cheek, “So you can stop with your crazy theory that Sehun likes me. His heart still belongs to Kai and mine belongs to you. That’s not going to change.”

Chanyeol closed his eyes has he took in his boyfriend’s words. It was all starting to make sense now. Sehun was Kai’s lover, so of course, he would be interested in his family, his brother, his twin.

He nodded, “Okay, Nini. I’ll stop. I’m sorry.”

Jongin smirked, “Don’t be. It’s kind of sexy. You acting all jealous and possessive.”

Chanyeol wrapped his arms around Jongin and brought his face down next to his, “It’s not an act. You’re mine. Don’t forget that.”

~.~.~.~

Christmas was just next week so the mall was crazy busy with last minute shopping. Jongin decided to apply for a clothing store in the mall in addition to the bridal shop and got hired almost immediately.

He had been working there for a couple of weeks and really enjoyed it. He still missed his dance studio, but Chanyeol had informed him that there was still no clue on who killed his dance teacher, so the studio remained close until further notice.

Jongin was organizing a rack of clothes when someone cleared their throat.

Thinking it was a customer, Jongin quickly turned around.

“Hello, Jongin.” The pink haired male smiled.

Jongin almost had forgotten the other’s name, “Ah, Jimin-shi, how are you?”

Jimin tilted his head, “I’m surprised you remember my name, being that we only met once before the dance studio closed.”

Jongin smiled, “I’m usually pretty good at remembering names.”

Jimin stepped around the clothing rack, his fingers running along the different materials, “I guess that’s another thing that your twin differed from you in.”

“Excuse me?”

Jimin smirked, “If you weren’t useful, Kai couldn’t care less about you. He could look directly at a person and not see them at all. It was amazing, actually.”

The blonde slightly frowned. He really didn’t like the way Jimin was talking about his twin.

“Kai was just easily misunderstood. I’m sure he cared a lot.”

Jimin stood in front of the other dancer and looked him up and down. If he hadn’t known Kai was dead already, he would have sworn he was looking right at the beautiful assassin.

Amazing.

“On the contrary, the only thing Kai cared about was taking care of his dog.”

“Kai didn’t have a-.” the dancer started.

“Jongin.”

Jimin smirked, “Speak of the devil.”

Both dancers faced the new voice.

“Sehun,” Jongin spoke first.

Sehun didn’t even look at his friend, his eyes were locked on Jimin. He wanted to kill the other right there and then, but they were in public. But most importantly, Jongin was here. Sehun wouldn’t allow Jongin to see that side of him.

“Ah, Sehun. Fancy seeing you here.”

Jongin caught the sarcasm in Jimin’s voice and looked to Sehun for answers.

Sehun’s jaw was clenched and his stare was…scary. Jongin didn’t know what exactly was going on, but he had to urge to get Sehun away from Jimin.

Placing a hand on the small of Sehun’s back, “Actually, I’m about to get off work right now. Nice seeing you again, Jimin-shi.”

The dancer gently pushed Sehun away from the pink haired male.

When they got to the other side of the store Jongin crossed his arms, “He gives me the creeps, to be honest, how did he know Kai again?”

“He didn’t.” Sehun hissed.

“But he-.”

“Trust me, Jongin. He didn’t know Kai.” Sehun said firmly.

Jongin stared up at his friend, “Ok. I trust you. Let me go clock out so we can leave. Wait here.”

Sehun nodded and Jongin disappeared into the back on the store.

The killer’s eyes scanned the store until they landed on Jimin by the exit.

The pink haired male winked at Sehun before leaving with a few other males that were acting as shoppers in Jongin’s store.  

Sehun cursed inwardly.

He needed to be more careful. BTS had just as many members as EXO, maybe even more. Anyone could be under their influence so the chance of something happening to Jongin was high.

He needed more eyes on Jongin. There was no way Sehun could always be at Jongin’s side.

Sehun pulled out his phone and texted another gang member.

94: I need to talk to you later.

It didn’t take long for Sehun to get a response.

12: When?

94: Tonight. My place.

12: K. See you then.

Sehun shoved his phone in his pocket when Jongin returned.

“Okay, let’s go eat.”

Sehun followed behind the smiling male.

He never wanted Jongin to lose that smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sehun's relationship with Jongin isn't healthy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)

Kyungsoo was surprised when he got a text from Sehun.

 

The younger never asked others for help. He always handled situations alone.

 

I work better when I’m alone.

 

They weren’t close, but one could say that out of all the other members of EXO, Kyungsoo was the one Sehun hated the least.

 

That was fine though.

 

The wide-eyed male didn’t mind the barrier between them. It was probably for the best, anyway

 

Sehun wasn’t a people person.

 

Never has been.

 

Again, it was probably for the best. Everyone close to Sehun always ended up getting hurt.

 

Kyungsoo sat on the couch in Sehun’s living room as the other changed his clothes.

 

The gang member looked around the flat.

 

Something was off.

 

Sehun’s once lonely apartment seemed...warm.

 

The couch, for example, was new. Last time Kyungsoo checked, the taller only had a single chair and table in the living room, but now there was a couch, paintings on the wall, and TV with a nice surround sound attached. There was bookshelf with various books and movies and even a couple of board games.

 

Sehun’s place hadn’t looked so full since….him.

 

The situation still weighed heavy on Kyungsoo’s heart. Kai was a friend, his best friend actually. The three gang members, he, Kai and Luhan, use to do everything together. Then emotions got involved and things began to fall apart.

 

The one thing that remained the same was Kai’s optimism. Through thick and thin, the dancer saw the bright side in everything.

 

Kyungsoo smiled at the thought of his late friend.

 

Kai, you are surely missed.

 

There was a quick knock on the front door before it was suddenly opened.

 

Surprised, Kyungsoo pulled out his gun and held it at his side.

 

Sehun didn’t have people over. The cold man didn’t like anyone enough to even have company.

 

So who dared to trespass in the devil’s home?

 

Kyungsoo slowly stepped toward the front before quickly jumping in front of the intruder, gun aimed directly at the stranger.

 

It all happened so fast, Kyungsoo’s mind couldn't keep up.

 

He gasped.

 

The man screamed.

 

Sehun was standing in front of the intruder, wearing a dark expression on his face.

 

“Put down your gun!” the demon had yelled.

 

Still not registering what was being commanded of him, the small man remained frozen in place. He couldn't move. How could he?

 

He was seeing a ghost.

 

“K-Kai…”

 

Sehun closed his eyes as if trying to calm himself.

 

He wasn't the only one. Kyungsoo’s heart was thumping against his ribcage so hard and so fast.

 

Was he seeing things? Was he going crazy? Why was he suddenly seeing his dead friend? Why now?

 

“I can explain.” Sehun finally spoke.

 

Kyungsoo didn't answer. All he could do was stare at the blonde male hiding behind Sehun like a scared child.

 

“Soo.”

 

That caught his attention. Sehun never called the other by his nickname.

 

Sehun spoke again, slowly, “Let me explain.”

 

~.~.~.~

 

After calming Jongin down and talking for a moment, Sehun apologized to his friend once more before walking him to the front door.

 

“Thanks again for bringing me my wallet.”

 

Jongin smiled, “No problem. Can’t believe you didn’t even realize you left it.”

 

Sehun shrugged, “Nothing important was in it.”

 

“You have a ton of cash in there, Sehun. You should be more careful.” Jongin nagged.

 

Sehun nodded, “Ok, I’ll try to do better. Thanks again.”

 

“Of course! I should get going, Taemin is waiting outside in the car for me. Talk on the phone later?”

 

Sehun smiled slightly, “Sure.”

 

The assassin opened the door and Jongin left.

 

Sehun’s semi-smile fell the moment he saw Kyungsoo’s disappointed face.

 

“Sehun, what the actual fuck! Is this why you wanted to talk to me?! You wanted to tell me that you found Kai’s fucking twin and wanted to play house again?! No! No! Just no!”

 

Sehun couldn’t even be mad, “We aren’t playing house.”

 

Kyungsoo’s eyes were wild, “Oh really? Then what the hell is all this,” he waved his hands all around, “You aren’t playing house, but he sure as hell left his mark all in your apartment.”

 

“I…”

 

Kyungsoo refused to listen to the other’s excuses. Because there was nothing the other could say that would convince him that Sehun being the bodyguard on his murdered ex-lover’s twin was a good idea.

 

“Sehun I knew you were crazy. I didn’t know you were a fucking dumb ass!”

 

Sehun’s eyes were still looking to the floor, “I..”

 

“You what, Sehun? You really can’t see that nothing good will come out of this. He looks EXACTLY LIKE HIM! Say what you want, but I know you feel something for him. Hell, I’ve only seen him once and I already want to be his best fucking friend!”

 

“He’s just a friend…” Sehun finally got out.

 

Kyungoo scoffed, “Just a friend? Have you forgotten who you are? You’re the Ice Prince, the Silent Devil, Mr. Heartless, you don’t have fucking friends, Sehun. Stop trying to tell yourself otherwise. It’s pointless.”

 

Sehun’s jaw clenched at the smaller’s word.

 

It was the truth. Every single word.

 

Sehun didn't care about anyone or anything anymore. He hasn't used his heart in so many years. He almost forgotten he even had one.

 

Kai left Sehun’s heart ruined, damaged to the very core. There was no way it could ever be repaired.

 

But...then there was Jongin.

 

Suddenly, everything Sehun thought was impossible wasn’t so unattainable anymore.  

 

Jongin gave him reason to live again. As long as Jongin was at his side, Sehun felt like he was untouchable.

 

But that was the problem before. As untouchable as the demon might be, his angel was still vulnerable. And others will take advantage of that, they did take advantage of that.

 

No matter how strong Sehun was, he couldn’t save Kai in the end.

 

“I’m telling Kris to take you off this one. Let Jackson or someone watch over Jongin. It’s not safe. For you or anyone else at that matter” Kyungsoo shook his head as he started toward the front door.

 

“No…” Sehun.

 

Kyungsoo turned around, “Sehun, jus-.”

 

“No. I’m not letting you or Kris take this away from me. I need to be close to him, Soo. I need to protect him. If you won’t help me, that’s fine. But I won’t let you take him from me. I need him.”

 

Kyungsoo stood quietly for a moment.

 

This was bad. He could feel it in his gut. Sehun was unstable. There was no way Sehun could handle this alone. His fragile mind would make him go crazy.

 

Sehun was deadly enough when he was sane. If Kris tried to take Sehun off this mission, heaven only knows what the killer would do.

 

Sane Sehun was scary.

 

Insane Sehun was downright terrifying.

 

“Fine. I’ll help look after him,” Kyungsoo swung open the front door, “But don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

 

When the door closed, Sehun ran a hand through his hair and exhaled.

 

The assassin flopped down on the new couch Jongin had picked out the weekend before

 

He looked up at the wall clock Jongin had bought the day before.

 

He inhaled the vanilla soy scented candles Jongin had given to him one day as a random gift.

 

Sehun stared at the lock screen photo of Jongin that he secretly took on one of their many lunch dates.

 

“I won’t let them take you away from me. I’ll protect you. Forever.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)

“So the person who killed that dance teacher wasn’t part of  BTS, but of EXO?”

 

Chanyeol nodded, “Yes, sir. All of the evidence leads to EXO.”

 

Baekhyun looked over the files. The male before him was right. All of the reports, witnesses, and other files pointed directly to the underground mafia group.

 

Placing the files neatly on his desk, Baekhyun looked up at the officer, “So do we have a suspect?”

 

Chanyeol looked down, “No sir, but rumor has it that the group is having a meeting in one of the warehouses down by their loading dock for foreign goods. They are supposed to be getting together Friday night.”

 

“So you plan to bust them then?”

 

“Absolutely! Even if we don’t find the killer, we will have more than enough criminals that will finally get put behind bars.” Chanyeol stated with complete confidence in his voice.

 

Baekhyun smiled, “Sounds like a plan.”

 

Chanyeol grinned, “Great.”

 

Baekhyun looked the tall male up and down, “You want to be a detective, Park?”

 

“Huh?”

 

Baekhyun rose from his desk and walked around it and sat on the edge.

 

Crossing one leg over the other, “I’m promoting you to detective, Park. Celebrate.”

 

Chanyeol was speechless, “Sir...I don’t know what to say.”

 

“Say ‘Thanks Baekhyun. You’re amazing!’ That should do it.” Baekhyun laughed.

 

“Thanks, Baekhyun. You’re amazing.”

 

Baekhyun froze and looked at his subordinate. He was just kidding, but the look on Chanyeol’s face was sincere. His eyes were bright with happiness.

 

The chief cleared his throat and turned away, “Right. Well, I should get back to work.”

 

Chanyeol bowed, “Of course. Thanks again, Chief .”

 

Once the giant left his office, Baekhyun placed both hands on his heated cheeks.

 

“Aish, what the hell, Baekkie. Stop being foolish.”

 

~.~.~.~

 

Jongin subconsciously swirled his stirring stick around the rim on his mug.

 

His thoughts were on numerous things, but mostly Sehun.

 

The dancer had been out all day shopping for last minute Christmas gifts with Taemin, but he hadn’t found anything for Sehun. He had got him a bunch of small gifts, to give on Christmas Eve, but he wanted to give Sehun something special on Christmas day.

 

He just didn’t know what.

 

“Something the matter?”

 

Jongin looked up at Taemin sitting across the table and shook his head, “No, just wondering on what to get Sehun for Christmas.”

 

“Well, what does he like? Anything that he needs?” Taemin asked.

 

“He likes...the color red. I know he wears a lot of black, but he looks good in red. Really good…”

 

Taemin frowned at the last mumbled comment, “Is there anything he doesn’t look good in?”

 

Still lost in his thoughts, “No. He looks great in everything…”

 

“Does he, Nini?”

 

“Huh?”

 

Taemin scoffed, “You’re too attached to him.”

 

Jongin blushed and sipped his hot chocolate, “Stop it. What are you talking about, Tae?”

 

“See. You're so caught in Sehun's web, you don't even realize it.”

 

“His web? You make him sound dangerous, Tae.”

 

“He j-.”

 

Jongin stood up, “Look, I know Sehun is hard to read and is rough around the edges but he is my friend and I care about him. If you're my friend, you will respect that.”

 

Taemin watched as his childhood friend put money on the table and leave the cafe.

 

Did Jongin really not see how close he was to falling?

 

~.~.~.~

 

“Please, please, please, don’t kill me. I’m sorry I just don’t have the money right now. It’s Christmas time, I wanted to get my kids something, but I’ll have it. Please, under-.”

 

Luhan didn’t even flinch as Sehun backhanded the baker, snapping his neck.

 

Wow, Luhan thought.

 

Sehun never failed to amaze the Chinese assassin with his strength and ability to have absolutely no concern for human life. Luhan was all about following orders, but there was a limit even for him. Sehun was so damn heartless it was unreal.

 

How did he get that way? Luhan truly wanted to know. When they dated Sehun didn’t talk to him about his personal life, especially his life before joining EXO.

 

What made you so cold?

 

Sehun stepped over the dead body and walked toward Luhan, eyes on his phone.

 

“Our next visit is just right down the street. And old seamstress wh-.”

 

“What should I get Jongin for Christmas?”

 

Luhan froze, “Huh?”

 

The deer-eyed beauty stared at his partner in disbelief. Did he hear him correctly? Couldn’t have. Because it sounded like Sehun had asked for Luhan’s opinion on a gift.

 

There was so much wrong with that simple question.

 

Sehun never asked for other’s for their options because no one mattered.

 

Sehun didn’t buy gifts because no one mattered.

 

So what the hell was going on now?

 

“You’re asking me what gift you should get for….Jongin?”

 

Still looking down at his phone, “ Correct.”

 

“I...um..I-I don’t..wow.” Luhan ended.

 

Sehun looked up, “Wow?”

 

Luhan really should let it go, it was the smart decision. But Sehun was being so cruel. The Chinese man was getting so tired of Sehun treating him like he was nothing. A gift for Jongin? Bullshit!

 

“What about me, Sehun?”

 

“What about you, Luhan?” Sehun countered.

 

Luhan scoffed, “You know, you’re really something you know that? I’m your boyfriend, Sehun. Why are you getting something for Jongin? Did you get me a Christmas gift?”

 

“Why would I do that, Luhan? You’re not really my boyfriend and I don’t care for you.” the assassin stated as a matter of factly.

 

So. Damn. Heartless.

 

Luhan clinched his fist as he tried to stop the tears from forming in his eyes, “But you care about him, huh? Of course, you do, he looks just like Kai.”

 

“What do you mean by that?”

 

Sehun’s dark eyes bored into him, but Luhan refused to hold back. If Sehun killed him, at least he had spoken his mind.

 

“I loved you, Sehun. I still love you, as crazy as that may be. It hurt when you left me for Kai. It tore me apart, but I swallowed my pride and let you be happy. But Kai’s gone now, and he has been for 2 years now. I know it hurts. Losing the person you love is painful, trust me, I know. But you have to move on. You have to.”

 

Luhan continued despite the way Sehun’s brows furrowed in obvious confusion.

 

“This game you are playing with Jongin, it’s not healthy, Sehun. You are placing your longing for Kai onto Jongin and it’s messing with you head. You don’t love Jongin, Sehun. You miss Kai and want to act like nothing has changed, but everything has changed. Jongin can not love you like you love him. He already has someone who has his heart and that’s not going to change because his brother’s ex has unexplainable feelings for him. Just let it go, Sehun. Let him go before he gets hurt too.”

 

Luhan walked away before Sehun could see his tears.

 

But Sehun didn't need to see them to know that Luhan was crying.

 

'Let him go before he gets hurt too'.

 

Too

 

Meaning like Kai got hurt.

 

Because of Sehun.

 

He didn't save Kai.

 

Kai was dead because Sehun didn't protect him.

 

He had failed Kai.

 

Sehun thought about what Luhan had said. His mind desperately tried to understand. But he couldn't.

 

Luhan was saying that Sehun really didn't love Jongin.

 

But that was impossible.

 

Sehun needed Jongin.

 

He couldn't be without him for long without feeling like his whole world was falling apart.

 

He couldn't sleep unless Jongin’s voice was the last sound he heard before he closed his eyes.

 

He couldn't be happy unless Jongin was right there next to him.

 

Sehun would do anything for Jongin. Anything.

 

That was love, right?

 

~.~.~.~

 

Jongin carefully finished wrapped Sehun's gift and placed it under the tree.

 

He couldn't wait to see Sehun's face when he opened it.

 

He's going to love it, the dancer thought.

 

Christmas was in 2 more days! Jongin couldn't have been more excited.

 

He planned to have a group of his friends get together and spend the day together. Watch movies, play board games, listen to music and dance, make hot chocolate, and simply enjoy each other's company.

 

That would be so perfect.

 

Jongin sat at his laptop and looked up recipes. He would start cooking tomorrow so everything would be ready Christmas morning.

 

The sound of the front door opening snatched the dancer’s attention from the screen.

 

He smiled when he saw his boyfriend enter.

 

“Welcome home.”

 

Chanyeol smiled at Jongin before he hung his coat on the rack, “Hey, baby.”

 

The police officer walked up kissed Jongin’s cheek.

 

“Hm.” Jongin smiled, “How was your day?”

 

“Good, I got a promotion.”

 

Jongin completely  turned around in his chair, “What?! Babe, that's amazing!”

 

Jongin got up and threw his arms around the taller’s neck. Chanyeol wrapped an arm around Jongin and buried his face in the side of the dancer’s neck.

 

Gosh, Jongin was so soft and warm.

 

Finally pulling back, Chanyeol smiled down at his beautiful boyfriend, “Thanks, babe. But….”

 

Jongin’s eyes narrowed in suspension, “But?”

 

Chanyeol bit his lip, “I have to work on Christmas.”

 

Jongin’s mouth dropped open, “But Yeollie, I have so much planned. Wh-.”

 

The dancer was silenced by a pair of soft lips on his.

 

“I know. I know. But it won't take long I promise. I'll be back before you know it.”

 

Jongin crossed his arms and gave his boyfriend the cutest pout ever!

 

But Chanyeol would never tell the smaller that.

 

“I have to do this, Nini. It's really important to me.”

 

After a few moments, Jongin finally gave in to his boyfriend's silly grin, “Fine, but please don't stay out too long. I don't want our guest to feel unwanted.”

 

Chanyeol kissed Jongin again, “Thanks, baby. I promise I'll come home quickly.”

 

Jongin nodded and walked toward the kitchen to make some tea.

 

“So what do you have to do that can't wait until some other day?”

 

Chanyeol hesitated. He knew if he told Jongin that he was going to raid a mafia get together, his boyfriend would freak out with worry.

 

So..

 

“Last minute paperwork. Which is why I said I'll be back soon. It won't take that long, but I have to do it at the precinct.” He lied.

 

“Oh. Ok.” Jongin called out.

 

The police officer felt bad for lying to the dancer, but what Jongin didn't know wouldn't hurt him

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christmas day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)

Christmas day.

 

The snow was falling ever so lightly and happy people flooded the sidewalks.

 

Sehun looked out his apartment window in disgust. Everyone was so damn happy. It was made the dark-eyed male feel sick. He just wanted to stay inside until the dreadful day was over so that maybe...just maybe the memories would stop intruding his mind.

 

He didn't want to remember the laughs that use to fill his four walls.

 

The smiles.

 

The cuddles.

 

The love.

 

He didn't want to remember...him.

 

Sehun’s fist clenched as the vision pushed past his defenses anyway.

 

 

Flashback:

 

“Pass me that.”  

 

Sehun passed the smaller his red and green mug.

 

“Thanks, love,” the dancer carefully sipped his hot chocolate, “You make this best hot cocoa. Have I ever told you that?”

 

“Every time.” Sehun smiled at the love of his entire life.

 

Kai grinned, “And don’t you forget it.”  

 

Sehun pulled his boyfriend closer to his chest. It seemed that even with just skin between them, Kai was never close enough.

 

I love you…

 

 

He didn’t say those three words out loud then. There were so many times the assassin neglected saying those words aloud. But honestly, if Sehun told Kai he loved him every time he thought it….those words would have been on a constant repeat.

 

~.~.~.~

 

“Are you sure you have to go?”

 

Chanyeol looked down at his cute boyfriend, “Yes, baby. But I will be back before you even realize I’m gone.”  

 

Jongin crossed his arms, “But everyone will be here in a few moments. Can you stay a little longer?”

 

The detective turned away and pulled on his overcoat,  “Nini, I can’t. I have to go.”

 

“Fine.”

 

Sighing, Chanyeol cupped the tan male’s face, “Hey, I love you. I’ll come back as soon as I can.” He kissed the smaller’s nose, “I promise.”

 

Still frowning, Jongin watched as Chanyeol opened the door to their apartment only to be greeted by Taemin and Minho’s smiling faces.

 

“Hey, Chan!” Taemin noticed that the newly promoted officer looked like he was leaving, “Going out?”

 

Chanyeol stepped aside and allowed the couple to enter.

 

“I have some work to do, but I’ll be back,” Chanyeol explained.

 

Taemin nodded and glanced at his friend’s disappointed face. He looked away before Jongin could notice though. He didn’t want to draw more attention to the matter. He could only imagine that Jongin already tried to fight the other on it.

 

Clearly, the dancer loss that fight.

 

He smiled, hoping to cheer his friend up a little, “No worries. We’re going to have fun with or without you. Right, Nini?”

 

Jongin looked at his best friend and smiled a little, “Yeah.”

 

Chanyeol didn’t miss the drag in his boyfriend’s tone, but he had to meet up with Baekhyun and the others to plan out how they would approach EXO’s meeting.

 

“Well don’t have too much fun without me,” Chanyeol kissed Jongin once more, “Bye, babe.”

 

Chanyeol didn't look back because if he did, he knew he would stay. He couldn't do that. He had to do this.

 

The tall man was about to get into his car when he noticed two people approaching his apartment building.

 

One was Luhan. Even from afar Chanyeol could spot the cute dear-like male. Why were all of Jongin’s friends just so damn adorable?

 

The person next to Luhan must have been Sehun. When the man ran his fingers through his hair, Chanyeol for sure knew it was Sehun.

 

It seemed like like everything that guy did he was posing for a camera. The man was so flawlessly handsome, Chanyeol couldn’t stop the small sting of jealousy in his chest.

 

He knew Jongin said the other was in love with Kai and was dating Luhan now, but Chanyeol still had this feeling that Sehun wanted something more than friendship from Jongin. He trusted Jongin, he did. He knew the other would never betray him or hurt him on purpose, but everything about Sehun just made him uneasy.

 

He didn’t trust him.

 

But Jongin did, so Chanyeol would allow their ‘friendship’ to continue.

 

But the first time Sehun fucked up, Chanyeol would never let Jongin see him ever again.

 

Ever.

 

The buzzing in his pocket notified him that he just got a text.

 

Chief: Where are you?

 

Chanyeol slid inside his car.

 

On my way.

 

~.~.~.~

 

When Jongin opened the door, Sehun felt like he was punched directly in the chest.

 

Hard.

 

Jongin was wearing a fuzzy white swear that slightly hung off his shoulder, tight dark blue skinny jeans, brown boots, and a cute reindeer headband.

 

So fucking beautiful.

 

“Luhan, Sehun. So glad you guys made it. Come on in.”  Jongin beamed.

 

Sehun noticed something different in the way the dancer smiled but decided to bring it up later. He entered behind Luhan and helped the Chinese out of his coat like the perfect gentlemen he pretended to be.

 

He took off his coat and started toward the closet to hang them up, but Jongin stepped in front of him.

 

“I’ll take those,” he grabbed the winter garments, “Go join the others in the living room. I’m making hot chocolate.”  he said.

 

“I umm…”

 

Jongin tilted his head, “Hm?”

 

Sehun cleared his throat and tried again, “Can I help?”

 

Jongin smiled that dazzling smile Sehun so used to.

 

Please don’t...

 

“You sure? Do you even know how to make hot chocolate?” the dancer laughed.

 

You’re killing me, Jongin...

 

“I can try,” Sehun answered.

 

Jongin smiled even wider and hung up the coat in the closet before turning to grab Sehun’s hand.

 

“Let’s do it then.”

 

Sehun’s heart began to beat at an impossible pace.

 

You’ll be the death of me…

 

~.~.~.~

 

Jongin ended up watching Sehun make all of the drinks. He looked like a pro as he finished up with whip cream and chocolate drizzles on the tops.

 

It made the dancer giggle seeing Sehun expect the mugs for perfection. Who would have thought that tall, dark, and handsome Oh Sehun was a professional barista.

 

“What’s funny?”

 

Jongin hopped down from the kitchen table and approached the taller. He scanned the tray of hot chocolates, all with a different chocolate designs on the tops.

 

“Which one is mine?” he asked.

 

His playful smile fell slightly when Sehun pointed to the mug with the chocolate heart on top. He was sure that one was for Luhan. What was the other playing at?

 

Even so, the dancer took the mug and gently blew on the hot liquid.

 

Slowly and careful not to burn his tongue, Jongin tasted the drink. His eyes widened at the delicious sweetness.

 

“Wow! This is amazing, Sehun! This is like the best hot chocolate I’ve ever had!” he couldn’t contain his excitement. He loved sweet things, especially drinks.

 

Sehun let out a deep chuckle, “I’m glad you like it.”

 

Jongin nodded, “I love it. Come on, let’s share with the others.”

 

Taemin, Minho, and Luhan were sitting on the floor surrounding a board game. They looked up when Jongin and Sehun entered.

 

“Done?” Taemin asked quickly standing and nearing Sehun, who was holding the tray of hot beverages.

 

He grabbed a mug and took a sip, “Wow, Nini. This taste amazing. What did you do different this time?”

 

Drawn to Taemin’s reaction, Luhan and Minho followed suit and stood to retrieve their cups.

 

He was right. The hot chocolate was delightful.

 

 

Jongin smiled, “What did I do differently? I let Sehun make them this time.”

 

 

Luhan froze.

 

Sehun made these? Sehun made something? Luhan wholeheartedly believed the only thing Sehun could do was kill. Now, his partner is making hot chocolate like he is some stay at home dad? The other EXO members would never believe Luhan.

 

Not in a million years.

 

Luhan noticed the half heart on the top of Jongin’s mug. He scoffed.

 

How cute, he thought bitterly.

 

“Wow, Sehun. Thanks, man!” Minho said, a hand gently clasping Sehun’s shoulder.

 

“No problem,” Sehun mumbled as he sat the tray down on the coffee table. He grabbed his mug and sat down on the couch.

 

The others made their way back to the floor to continue their game.

 

Jongin sat on the arm of the couch right next to Sehun and watched his friends play. He was so happy.

 

“Where’s Chanyeol?”

 

Jongin frowned.

 

“He had to work, ”Taemin answered for him, “He said he would be back later.”

 

“Work? On Christmas?” Luhan questioned. That didn’t seem right.

 

“He said he had some paperwork to finish.” Jongin continued where Taemin left off.

 

“Hm.” Was all Luhan said.

 

That was a lie. He would bet his life on that. No paperwork was that important.

 

What was Chanyeol really doing?

 

The Chinese glanced at Jongin. The topic obviously put a damper on his mood.

 

But the assassin really couldn’t care less about Jongin’s feelings.

 

~.~.~.~

 

“I think it’s time for us to head home now, Nini.”

 

Jongin smiled as Minho helped Taemin up off the couch. His friend could never hold his alcohol well, but since it was a holiday no one stopped him from turned back the shots one after the other.

 

Jongin carefully rose to his feet. He was a little drunk too, but unlike Taemin, he could still somewhat function.

 

“Nini~ don’t let….h- him take me. I’m okay...I...I want to stay…”Taemin mumbled into Minho’s chest.

 

“It’s okay, Tae. The party is over anyway. You’re not missing anything.” Jongin assured his drunken friend.

 

“Mmm...okay. Minho, carry me.” Taemin demanded cutely.

 

Rolling his eyes, Minho hooked his arms under his boyfriend’s legs and picked him up.

 

Jongin followed them to the door. He was going to open it for his friends, but Sehun had beat him to it.

 

“Thanks, Sehun,” Minho said.

 

“No problem.” Sehun nodded.

 

Minho looked back at the others, “Bye Luhan, bye Nini. Thanks for having us and thank you for the gifts.”

 

Taemin clutched the gift bags to his chest, “Yeah...love them. Love you, Nini.”

 

“Love you guys too.” Jongin smiled sweetly at his friends as he stood next to Sehun.

 

Taemin’s eyebrows furrowed, “Nini?”

 

“Yes, Tae?”

 

“Don’t f-fall for Se-Sehun…”

 

Jongin’s eyes widened at that, “What?”

 

“Taemin, baby, you’re drunk. You don’t know what you’re saying.”Minho tried to steer his boyfriend away from the awkward topic he has talked to him about many times before.

 

Tamein had mentioned his theory on Jongin falling for Sehun to Minho and even though Minho liked Chanyeol, the idea of Sehun and Jongin being together didn’t sound so bad to him. He liked Sehun a lot. But, on the other hand Taemin hated the idea. He voiced his opinion of Sehun, and it wasn’t a good one either. But, whoever Jongin wanted to be with was none of their business, no matter how much Taemin believed otherwise.

 

Ignoring his boyfriend’s attempt to silence him, Taemin spoke his mind anyway, this time looking directly at Sehun.

 

“P-please.. Don’t drag him down with you... He deserves more…”

 

Taemin’s head dropped down to Minho’s chest and quiet snores were suddenly the loudest noise in the room.

 

Jongin couldn’t move.

 

What was Taemin saying? It was bad enough when he brought up his crazy theory when it was just them, but now he done went ahead and mentioned it to Sehun. What would Sehun think of him now? Did he think Jongin had be talking to Taemin about him? Would he be angry? Would he not want to be friends anymore?

 

He didn’t want that. He liked being friends with Sehun. He liked having the other around to talk to and simply just like his company. Something about the other made Jongin feel like he didn’t have a single thing in life to worry about. When he was with Sehun, the dancer didn’t have a care in the world.

 

He didn’t want to lose that.

 

Not over something as ridiculous as Taemin’s stupid idea that Sehun was hiding something from him.

 

“Um...,”Minho broke the deafening silence, “Sorry about that Sehun. He’s not himself right now.”

 

Sehun only nodded and walked back into the living room.

 

Jongin’s chest tightened.

 

“Sorry, Nini.” Minho apologized again.

 

“It’s okay, Minho. Just get him home and get some rest. We’ll talk tomorrow.”

 

Minho nodded and left the apartment, Jongin closing the door behind him.

 

The dancer quickly entered the living only to stop when he noticed Luhan sitting quietly on the loveseat.

 

He had completely forgotten the Chinese male was there. That made matters even worst. Surely Luhan heard everything. He really didn’t want to lose Luhan and Sehun as friends because of this. He loved them.

 

“Luhan, I hope you know you have nothing to worry about.” Jongin sat next to the deer like beauty and placed a hand on his knee, “I would never do anything to hurt you or betray your trust.”

 

Luhan didn't say anything and Jongin bit his lip nervously.

 

“You know that right, Lu?” he tried again.

 

This time Luhan turned to look at him, his eyes wiping the smile right off Jongin’s face.

 

“I don’t know, Jongin. I’m starting to think betrayal runs in your family.”

 

From over by the balcony door, Sehun’s head snapped around toward the direction of where Luhan was now standing.

 

The darkness in Sehun’s eyes scared Luhan to death, but the smaller knew he was safe with Jongin being present.

 

Luhan knew that Sehun hopelessly thought that he could hide the monster that slumbered inside of him from Jongin forever. For some unbelievable reason, Sehun pretended to be an actual human being when Jongin was around and it made Luhan feel sick.

 

Sehun was a monster.

 

He was monster and Jongin needed to see it for himself. So gathering all the courage in his body Luhan continued signing his death wish.

 

“You’re just like him, you know. You pretend like you're so good, but behind closed doors, you’re just selfish. You steal everyone else's happiness and take it for yourself. You don’t care about who you hurt, as long as you’re satisfied.”

 

“That..that’s not true…”Jongin whispered loud enough for Luhan to hear. The dancer’s head still hung low, obviously hurt by his ‘friend’s’ words.

 

Eyes unconsciously watching Sehun, Luhan spoke again, “It is true. No use trying to deny it, Jongin. It’s in your DNA to hurt those around you. You don’t even realize it and it’s sad. I feel bad for Chanyeol. He truly believes that you are faithful to him, yet here you are tempting someone else’s boyfriend into falling for you.”

 

“I…”

 

“Are you proud of yourself, Jongin? You won. You got him. He’s right here. Pretending to be something he’s not just to be at your side. Congratulations, you succeeded in following in your brother’s footprints in stealing a demon’s heart and breaking your so called ‘friend’s.”

 

Jongin finally looked up at Luhan, the tears in his eyes as clear as day.

 

“Lu-”

 

“LUHAN!”

 

Jongin jumped back as Sehun flew across the room and slammed Luhan back against the wall by the neck. Luhan tried to pull Sehun’s hand away from his throat and failed.

 

“Do you want to die, 7? If that’s what you wanted you to know all you had to do was ask. I’ll gladly grant your wish.” Sehun growled.

 

Jongin’s hands clamped over his mouth at the venom in Sehun’s voice. He had never heard Sehun sound like that before. It sent waves of fear through the dancer’s body. He was terrified.

 

“Do it,” Luhan choked, “Show Jongin who you truly are.”

 

Sehun’s gaze bore holes into Luhan’s soul. He hadn’t seen Sehun this angry in a long time.

 

He must really care for Jongin then...fucking idiot.

 

Luhan closed his eyes as Sehun’s grip tightened around his neck and awaited his death.

 

But it never came.

 

Sehun dropped Luhan’s body, “Get out.”

 

The assassin didn’t need to be told twice. He quickly disappeared from Sehun’s sight and ran out of the apartment.

 

Jongin remained frozen on the couch, his legs pulled up to his chest. He was so scared. Why was this happening? It was Christmas. It was supposed to be a day filled with love and cheer. But all Jongin sensed was anger, pain, and fear. It was awful.

 

More tears began to fall from Jongin’s eyes. He tried to hide his face behind his legs. He just wanted to disappear. He didn’t want to be here anymore. Everyone was doing and saying things the dancer didn’t understand. He wanted to get away from this terrible nightmare.

 

When Jongin heard a thud he slowly brought his head up from his knees.

 

His breath caught at the sight of Sehun on his knees before him. The moonlight coming through the window behind him illuminated Sehun’s face beautifully. He no longer looked like the dangerous stranger he did a few moments ago. He was the Sehun Jongin knew again.

 

“Sehun…”

 

“Please don’t cry, Jongin. I..I can’t…” Sehun was struggling. Struggling to think, struggling to breathe, struggling to exist before the one who could break him down so easily.

 

It was unfair.

 

What did Sehun do to deserve this kind of torture...again. He had almost lost control on Luhan. He would have killed him. He should have killed him. So why didn’t he?

 

Sehun stared up into Jongin’s eyes. Those eyes that could strip Sehun of everything that makes him who he was. When Sehun saw the fear in Jongin’s eyes he couldn’t bring himself to kill Luhan. He hated that look on Jongin. He never wanted to be the cause of that look ever again.

 

“I’m sorry, Jongin. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. I-.”Sehun was cut off by Jongin throwing his arms around his shoulders and pulling him into a hug.

 

“Sehun…please don’t cry. It’s okay.”

 

Sehun closed his eyes and inhaled Jongin’s scent. He didn’t even realize he was crying. It’s been so long he forgot what crying felt like. He hated how weak he must have looked to Jongin right now. Why was he so damn weak?

 

Jongin’s fingers played with Sehun’s hair as he rested his cheek on top of Sehun’s head. Sehun was so calm now. Was this what heaven felt like? He wanted to remain like this, wrapped in Jongin’s arm, forever.

 

Slowly, Sehun’s arms found their way around Jongin’s waist. He subconsciously pulled Jongin closer, his face resting on the dancer’s stomach.

 

Please, he prayed to whatever god would listen, please let me have this for just a moment longer…

 

But the gods didn’t listen.

 

They never listened.

 

“What the fuck is going on here?!” came an angry voice.

 

Jongin scurried to his feet, leaving Sehun alone on his knees.

 

“Chanyeol.”

 

The gods hated Sehun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A visit to Kai's grave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)

“Chanyeol”

 

Even though Jongin was smiling the look on his boyfriend’s face was nowhere near amused.

 

Confused, Jongin slowly approached the taller male, “Everything okay?”

 

Chanyeol snatched away from Jongin’s outreached hand, his blood boiling. Was Jongin trying to joke around? Nothing was funny about the position Chanyeol had caught his boyfriend and Sehun in.

 

Chanyeol eyes shot daggers at Sehun who was now standing and facing him. The other didn’t look scared or even apologetic and that pissed Chanyeol off even more.

 

“Leave.”

 

Jongin flinched at the malice in Chanyeol’s voice. He looked over at Sehun, surprised to see that the other male was already staring at him.

 

The tears were gone, but there was still so much sadness in those dark orbs. He hadn’t even got the chance to ask Sehun why he was sad.

 

Jongin wanted to know. He needed to know.

 

He needed to comfort Sehun with words, or hugs, or whatever Sehun needed.

 

Jongin would do anything to keep that look off Sehun’s face.

 

Anything.

 

But right now, Chanyeol was also important. Clearly, something had happened that made his boyfriend act this way. Jongin had to make it better.

 

“What’s wrong, love? Did something happen at work?” Jongin tried again.

 

Chanyeol looked insulted, “Are you serious right now, Jongin?”

 

The dancer bit his lip, “I...I don’t understand, Yeollie. I was just asking. It’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it.”

 

Any other time Chanyeol would have given into Jongin’s soft voice. Any other time Chanyeol would have apologized to the dancer and kissed him all over his pretty face. Any other time Chanyeol would have felt bad about yelling at Jongin.

 

But that was before when Chanyeol didn’t have this burning jealousy in his chest.

 

“No, we need to talk about it.”

 

Jongin only nodded, he didn’t say anything.

 

Chanyeol cut his eyes at the reason him and Jongin were fighting in the first place.

 

Sehun was the reason Chanyeol felt like he had to constantly worry about who Jongin was with and how long he would be away. Things were perfect between him and Jongin, and Sehun had ruined it.

 

Chanyeol had never hated someone so much.

 

“STOP FUCKING LOOKING AT HIM!”

 

When Sehun’s eyes slowly found his, the detective smirked. He finally had his attention.

 

“Yeollie?”

 

Chanyeol sighed and ran his hand through his hair. He knew he should calm down, but he couldn’t. Not when flashes of Jongin’s arms wrapped around Sehun’s neck kept appearing in his head.

 

“I need you out of my home.”

 

Sehun rose a perfect eyebrow, amused by how upset the cop was. The assassin had no intention on leaving, but when he looked to Jongin the dancer nodded slightly.

 

Sehun hesitated for the first time in his life. In the back of his mind, the thought that Chanyeol would hurt Jongin was there. The thought alone made Sehun want to kill the wide-eyed male. Years ago, the slightest inkling would have been enough for Sehun to murder a person, no questions asked.

 

But now….

 

It’s okay, Jongin mouthed to Sehun from where Chanyeol couldn’t see. He didn’t want to make things worse than what they already were. He was starting to sense what his boyfriend was upset about.

 

Sehun looked at Chanyeol once more, “Fine.”

 

Chanyeol watched Sehun gather his belongings and head towards the door. He was only half surprised when Sehun looked at Jongin….again.

 

He clenched his fist.

 

“Call me if you need me,” Sehun said.

 

Chanyeol reached out and yanked Jongin closer to his chest, “He won’t need you. Have a nice night.”

 

Sehun wanted very much so to rip the taller male’s arms right out of its sockets for being so rough with Jongin, but the smile on the dancer’s face was the only reason he simply nodded and left the apartment.

 

The moment the door closed Chanyeol let go of Jongin and stepped back.

 

“What the hell were you two doing, Jongin?”

 

Jongin didn’t answer right away. He was still trying to wrap his mind around how jealous his boyfriend sounded. Did he not trust Jongin at all? Did he think so little of him?

 

“What do you think we were doing, Chanyeol?” Jongin countered, arms crossed over his chest.

 

The detective wasn’t deaf to the disappointment in his boyfriend’s voice. It was becoming Jongin’s usual tone with Chanyeol these days. He hated it.

 

Chanyeol closed his eyes and took a moment to compose himself and think about what he was going to say. When he opened them, Jongin no longer looked angry.

 

He looked hurt.

 

I'm a fucking idiot.

 

Without a word, Chanyeol pulled Jongin into a tight embrace.  

 

“I’m so sorry, Nini. I’m so stupid.” Chanyeol mumbled into Jongin’s hair.

 

The dancer didn’t respond immediately and Chanyeol was so scared he had really blown it this time, but then small arms wrapped around his waist and he knew he hadn’t lost Jongin.

 

Not this time. Not yet.

 

“Why have you been getting so jealous lately? It’s not like you. Do you not trust me anymore? Have I done something that made you question my loyalty?”  Jongin asked, listening to Chanyeol’s heartbeat through his chest.

 

“No, no, no, it’s not you. It’s him. I don't trust him, Nini. No matter what you say, I can’t trust him. I’m sorry, I can’t.”

 

Jongin sighed, “But why? Sehun is harmless. He’s never done or said anything that indicates that he likes me more than a friend.”

 

Chanyeol stepped back and looked down at Jongin, hands resting on his shoulders. Was Jongin really so…oblivious? Did he truly not see the effect he had on others?

 

“It’s the way he looks at you that has me so worried, Nini.”

 

Jongin’s brows knitted together in confusion. Of course, he wouldn't understand. Chanyeol barely understood it himself. But he tried to explain anyway.

 

“He looks at you like you are the reason his heart continues to beat. Like you are the reason he lives. Like you are sunshine after the worst of storms. Like you…,” Chanyeol sighed at Jongin’s wondering eyes, “He’s in love with you, Nini.”

 

Jongin’s head began to shake in denial, but Chanyeol held his face still in his hands.

 

No more.

 

No more denying what was as clear as day to everyone but Jongin himself.

 

“Please listen to me, Nini. I know what I’m talking about. I know that’s what he feels, because…I used to look at you the same way. I still do.” Chanyeol confessed.

 

Jongin stared up into Chanyeol's eyes, the usual light nowhere to be found. Chanyeol was completely serious this time.

 

“I....what do you want me to do?”

 

“Let’s go away for a few days. No phones, no distractions. Just you and me.”

 

“But-.”

 

“Please, Nini. I need this. Please.”

 

Jongin looked at the couch where he and Sehun were not long ago. He remembered the pain in Sehun’s eyes, the tears. It was too much for Jongin to bare. He had never seen Sehun look so fragile.

 

Then he looked up at Chanyeol, his best friend and lover. Even though the taller tried to hide it with a smile, Jongin saw the fear in his eyes. He was scared? Did the thought of another wanting Jongin’s affection really scare his boyfriend that much?

 

The tightening of hands on his arms answered that question quickly.

 

“Okay.”

 

“Really?” Chanyeol’s eyes began to get that light again.

 

Jongin smiled at that, “Yes, Yeollie. I’ll go away with you if that will make you happy.”

 

Chanyeol pulled Jongin into the tightest hug, “Thank you, Nini. Thank you.”

 

Jongin returned the hug, trying hard to ignore the stingy feeling in his eyes.

 

Will you be okay until I return….Sehun….

 

~.~.~.~

 

Sehun hadn’t heard from Jongin in two damn weeks and he felt like his insides were on fire.

 

He didn’t know if it was anger from Jongin leaving without a single word.

 

Or if it was the torment of not knowing where he was, if he was okay, and when he was coming back.

 

If he was coming back…

 

No.

 

He wouldn’t let himself think that way. He couldn’t. The feeling he got when he thought about the possibility that Jongin would never return to him was….nauseating.

 

If it wasn’t for Taemin telling him that Jongin had gone on a trip with Chanyeol Sehun would have set fire to the city looking for the dancer.

 

‘He wanted me to tell you that he’s okay and that he’s sorry he left so suddenly’

 

Sehun’s jaw clenched at the memory. Why couldn’t Jongin tell him that himself? Why was he only communicating to Taemin? Why wasn’t Jongin answering any of his text or calls? All Sehun wanted- needed was to hear Jongin’s voice.

 

He needed to hear it so fucking badly…

 

“Fuck!” Sehun growled as he punched a hole in his wall...again.

 

The assassin's back hit the wall before his legs gave out and he crumpled to the floor.

 

He stared at the blood dripping from his already bruised hand. It should be painful, but the burning in his chest was much much worst.

 

How did he get so pathetic?

 

It wasn't supposed to be like this. He wasn't supposed to be so disgustingly pitiful.

 

He was a killer.

 

Using his other hand, Sehun reached into his pocket and pulled out a silver necklace with a tiny heart-shaped locket attached. His thumb ran over the custom designs and words that were engraved into the metal.

 

The sentence repeated over and over again in his head. As if it would make the pain stop, he launched the necklace across the room.

 

“Sehun?”

 

Sehun was too caught up in his misery he didn’t hear that someone had entered his apartment.

 

A small hand picked up the abandoned necklace. Eyes looked over the details of the delicate piece of jewelry. It was beautiful. Obviously, it was custom made and from what was written on it, it was for a certain special someone.

 

The wide-eyed male looked down at Sehun’s tragic state. He wasn’t going to bother asking if the other was okay. There was no use in pretending that Sehun wasn’t a complete wreck and it didn’t take a genius to figure out the reason why.

 

“Sehun, come on. Get up.”

 

“Soo?”

 

“Yes, it’s me. I knocked, you didn’t answer so I let myself in,” he put out his hand, “Give me your hand.”

 

Sehun began to raise the blood covered one.

 

“Jesus, Sehun, what have you done?” Kyungsoo grabbed the clean hand and pulled Sehun up off the floor and led him to the bathroom.

 

He put Sehun’s bloody hand in the sink and ran cold water over it. It stung but Sehun didn’t make a sound.

 

Kyungsoo watched the red water ran down the drain, “Hurting yourself won’t bring him back, you know?”

 

Sehun waited for the other to specify what ‘him’ he was talking about, but he didn’t. He left Sehun to come to the conclusion on his own, but how could he when the two people he cared about both abandoned him.

 

Kai.

 

Jongin.

 

Both just left Sehun alone without a warning at all.

 

“I know that...but I’m so numb....”

 

Kyungsoo opened his mouth to comment but quickly decided against it.

 

He didn’t mention that Sehun was stronger than this.  

 

He also didn’t mention the silent tears that were running down Sehun’s face.

 

~.~.~.~

 

Jongin had returned to Korea a few days ago, but it wasn’t until he woke up and it was his birthday that he realized that he had been avoiding Sehun ever since he got back.

 

Honestly, it was because of guilt.

 

He felt so darn guilty for leaving Sehun and ignoring all of his attempts to contact him. But he knew that Sehun would be disappointed in him. He didn’t want to face that...not yet.

 

But it was his birthday today.

 

Meaning, it was Kai’s birthday today.

 

The dancer wanted to make sure that Sehun was okay. Once that was confirmed, he would be content.

 

He pulled out his phone and scrolled down to his friend’s name. He hovered over the call button for a few moments before bringing the phone to his ear.

 

It didn’t take long before Sehun answered.

 

Actually. It only took a single ring.

 

Jongin felt terrible.

 

“Jongin?”

 

His hand quickly covered his mouth, concealing the gasp. The distress in Sehun’s voice hit Jongin with an unbearing force. He couldn’t suppress the tears that formed in his eyes. It was awful. He had never felt so low.

 

“Oh my god, Sehun. I...I’m so-oh god, please...I”

 

Jongin began to shake with sadness. He was the worst friend.

 

“Sehun….forgive me,” Jongin finally got out, “Where are you? I’ll come to you.”

 

“I’m okay.”

 

Jongin was already pulling on his coat, “No, please don’t do that. Don’t lie to me. You’re home right? I’m on my way.”

 

“.....”

 

The dancer sighed, “I’m sorry...I know you must hate me right now.”

 

“....impossible. See you soon.”

 

Jongin didn’t mind that Sehun hung up on him. He was just grateful the other didn’t hate him.

 

~.~.~.~

 

When Sehun opened the door Jongin immediately threw his arms around the taller male.

 

“I’m so so so sorry, Sehun. I shouldn’t have left so suddenly. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have ignored your calls, I’m sorry about that too. I’m the worst friend ever, I know, but please know you don’t have to lie to me. If you need a shoulder to cry on, I’m here.”

 

Sehun didn’t move.

 

Jongin stepped back and looked up at his friend. Sehun’s hair was a mess and his eyes were red. He looked completely miserable.

 

“Sehun...I-.”

 

“Why did you leave?” Sehun cut him off.

 

That shocked Jongin. Not the question, but the way Sehun’s sounded was strange. He sounded sad over the phone, and he clearly looked liked he had been crying, but there was a bitterness to his tone.

 

“I...Chanyeol wanted to take a vacation. I couldn’t tell him no...I...I thought you said you weren’t mad at me.” Jongin spoke softly.

 

“No, Jongin. I said I didn’t hate you. But forgive me for not being thrilled that you abandoned me and ignored me for over 2 weeks now.”

 

Abandoned?

 

Jongin was taken aback by Sehun’s bluntness, “I’m s-.”

 

“I know. You’re sorry. You mentioned that.”

 

Sehun began to walk away and Jongin panicked.

 

He quickly grabbed Sehun’s arm, “Sehun, why...why are you being this way. I said I’m sorry for leaving, why are you taking it so personally?”

 

Sehun snatched his arm away, “You should go.”

 

“What? No!” Jongin didn’t understand. Why was Sehun pushing him away? It was a special day. They should spend it together.

 

“Jongin, please. I want to be alone now.” Sehun spoke, back still to the dancer.

 

“No, no, no, we should be together today. Please. After today if you never want to see me again that's fine. But at least let's enjoy each other's company today…”

 

Sehun sighed.

 

“Please, Sehun.”

 

Sehun closed his eyes at the desperation in Jongin's voice. He had lost the battle...again.

 

“Fine.”

 

Jongin smiled and walked to stand in front of the dark haired male. Sehun tried to look in another direction, but Jongin placed a soft hand on his cheek.

 

“Look at me.”

 

No…

 

“Sehun, please...you don't have to hide from me…”

 

But I'm so weak….

 

“I miss him too.”

 

That was all it took for Sehun’s walls to come crumbling down.

 

With tears falling down his face, Sehun grabbed Jongin and pulled him into the most comforting hug.

 

“I just need a moment~” Sehun sobbed into Jongin’s neck, “Just a moment…”

 

Jongin closed his wet eyes and laid his head on top of his friend’s. He rubbed Sehun's back, trying to soothe the other’s pain.

 

“It's okay. I got you.”

 

Sehun's arms pulled Jongin closer to him, forcing the dancer on his tiptoes.

 

“Wanna see him?” Jongin asked.

 

What?

 

Sehun pulled back slightly, “I...huh?”

 

Jongin smiled, “I was going to visit him today. Did you want to join me?”

 

“I don’t understand,” Sehun admitted.

 

No matter how he tried to think about it, Jongin’s question didn’t make sense. Kai was gone so what did Jongin mean by ‘see him’ and ‘visit him’? The only possibilities made Sehun’s tightened with emotions.

 

Jongin could tell that Sehun really was confused, “Um, like, his grave. I was going to visit his grave.”

 

Grave.

 

No.

 

Absolutely not.

 

After all these years Sehun had never…

 

“I can’t.”

 

“Why not?”

 

“I’ve never been there….”

 

Jongin gasped, “Really? Not once?”

 

Sehun shook his head, “I couldn’t..I just couldn’t, okay?”

 

Jongin nodded in understanding. Clearly, Sehun’s love for Kai was stronger than Jongin had thought.

 

That made the dancer so happy.

 

“Well, I would love it if you could join me this time.”

 

Sehun’s heart began to speed up, “I ca-.”

 

Jongin grabbed Sehun’s hand and squeezed it tight, “Yes, you can.”

 

Sehun looked down into Jongin’s eyes. They sparkled with beauty and were warm with honesty.

 

For the first time, Sehun thought that maybe...just maybe…. he could.

 

~.~.~.~

 

“So my dance studio is opening back up next week.”

 

Sehun looked over at Jongin in the driver’s seat. The smile on his face was as beautiful as ever.

 

Sehun had to remember to breathe.

 

“That’s great, but did the police find out who killed your teacher?”

 

Jongin flinched at the question and Sehun mentally cursed himself. He had to get better at being more sensitive to matters such as murder. Most people weren’t comfortable with death as Sehun was.

 

“Sorry,” he mumbled.

 

“No, it's okay. Not the exact person, but Yeollie says that it was a member of a gang...”

 

Sehun frowned. BTS…

 

“EXO.”

 

Sehun quickly escaped from his thoughts, “What?”

 

“EXO. That’s the name of the gang who murdered my teacher.”

 

Sehun didn’t miss the hatred in the dancer’s voice. It was new to Sehun. He didn’t like it one bit.

 

“Oh.”

 

“I hope Yeollie catches every single one of them and throws the behind bars to rot forever.”

 

Sehun’s fist clenched, “Oh.”

 

Jongin let out an awkward chuckle, “Sorry, didn’t mean to get all sinister on you. Forget what I just said, okay?”

 

How could he?

 

“Anyway, can we stop somewhere before we get to Kai?”

 

“Sure.”

 

Jongin smiled, “Perfect!”

 

~.~.~.~

 

“No.”

 

“Please~. We don’t have to stay long.” Jongin begged.

 

Sehun rolled his eyes, “Fine, go on.”

 

“Come with me.”

 

Sehun scoffed, “You’re really pushing it.”

 

“It’s my birthday.”

 

Damn you, you beautiful siren.

 

“You’re impossible.”

 

Jongin smiled in victory as Sehun went to buy their ice skates.

 

When he returned he handed the dancer the smaller pair and quickly changed into his own.

 

Jongin giggled at how frustrated Sehun got trying to lace up his skates.

 

After finishing up with his, Jongin knelt down to help his friend.

 

Sehun looked away in what he pretended to be annoyed, but Jongin knew he was just embarrassed

 

“You can be so cute sometimes.” Jongin laughed.

 

“Excuse me?”

 

Ignoring Sehun’s comment, Jongin stood up and held out his hand.

 

“Come with me?”

 

Sehun shook his head at how evil this angel could be.

 

He allowed Jongin to help him up on his feet.  His grip tightened around Jongin when he nearly slipped on the ice.

 

“Don’t worry, Sehun. I won’t let you fall.”

 

Sehun mindlessly followed Jongin to the circle of people skating around the rink.

 

I won’t let you fall….

 

You’re a little too late, Jongin.

 

~.~.~.~

 

“Thanks for lunch. You didn’t have to do that, you know?”

 

Chanyeol rolled his eyes, “Are you kidding me? It’s the least I could do for you letting me off the hook so easily. My past bosses weren’t nearly as forgiving.”

 

“Well, you’re a great detective, Park. Some things are worth looking the other way.”

 

Chanyeol looked over at his boss, “Thank you, Chief.”

 

Baekhyun quickly looked away, “Baekhyun is fine.”

 

The taller of the two smiled, “I like that better.”

 

In fear of his subordinate noticing the light pink of his cheeks, Baekhyun desperately tried to find another subject of interest.

 

His eyes searched their surroundings until they fell on a familiar pair.

 

What the hell is he doing?

 

He tried to quickly look away, but it was too late.

 

Chanyeol had noticed the pair too.

 

His eyes darkened at the two people walking close together, arms linked and looking like the ideal couple.

 

His muscles tightened and his blood began to boil with anger.

 

That’s it!

 

“I got to go.” Chanyeol basically growled.

 

Baekhyun touched the other’s arm, “Hey, I’m sure it’s nothing to worry about. Don’t get yourself worked up over nothing.”

 

Chanyeol shook off the smaller’s hand, “If it’s nothing, then there is no harm in following them.”

 

Baekhyun watched as Chanyeol quickly, yet completely unnoticed, caught up to the pair.

 

“Please be careful, Chan.”

 

~.~.~.~

 

After an hour or so of ice skating Jongin and Sehun finally made it out the where Kai was buried. Snow covered the ground, but there were patches of bright colored flowers throughout the field, indicating that even in the cold winter, loved ones were not forgotten.

 

Sehun suddenly wanted to turn back. He had to turn back.

 

He couldn’t do this after all. He-

 

“Hey,” Jongin’s warm gloved hand slipped into Sehun’s, “It’s okay. You can do this.”

 

Sehun searched Jongin’s eyes for anything that could mean deceit, but, like always, Jongin’s eyes never lied.

 

The assassin let out a sigh, “Okay.”

 

Jongin smiled and lead the way to the permanent resting place for this twin. He noticed the fresh bouquet of flowers already resting on the headstone.

 

“No matter how early I come, my parents always beat me to the punch.” Jongin chuckled softly. He turned to Sehun, “You wanna go first?”

 

Sehun quickly shook his head.

 

“Silly, just go. I want my time too.”

 

There was no room for debate, and Sehun understood that as clear as day.

 

The further he got from Jongin and the closer he got to Kai’s grave, Sehun’s mind suddenly forgot how to function properly. His chest moved up and down as he struggled to take in air at a constant pace. And even though he was breathing, his lung were burning as if they were denied oxygen for years. His body was now very much aware of the bitter cold around him and he began to shake.

 

Kim Kai

Beloved Son and Brother

A beautiful person who always saw the beauty in others.

 

Sehun’s heart dropped right along with the rest of Sehun’s body. He didn’t even try to hide his tears.

 

Not this time. Not with Kai.

 

“Oh, angel. I’m sorry I never came to see you. I can’t even lie, I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to see you like this, so still. It doesn’t fit you, my dear. You were so full of life, so restless. I still can’t believe it ended up like this. I’m so so sorry you ended up like this…I wish I could bring you back, angel. I would do anything.”

 

Sehun took off his glove and laid his hand on top of the grave. He didn’t care that it was freezing cold, he just wanted to feel a little closer to Kai once more.

 

“You never told me about Jongin. Why not? Was it me? Or did you just want to keep him away from all that was connected to your life here? It was probably the latter, right? You know I cared about everything you cared about. If you wanted me to protect him with my life, I would have gladly done it, just like I did for you.”

 

Sehun frowned.

 

“But I guess, I’m not really reliable in protecting people I care about, huh? I’m sorry, angel. I’m so so sorry I couldn’t protect you. Please, forgive me. I’ll make it up to you somehow. I’ll find who did this and I’ll make them suffer.”

 

Maybe Sehun didn’t realize that Jongin could hear him. Maybe he didn’t care. But Jongin’s smile slightly fell at the darkness in Sehun’s words.

 

“I know you always said that I couldn’t do anything on my own, and you’re right, I can’t. I always needed you to tell me what to do.”

 

Jongin’s smile was completely gone now. Why would Kai tell Sehun that? It wasn’t true at all.

 

“But, I promise that I can and will do this for you. I’ll protect Jongin for you too. I can see why you didn’t want him close to this mess that is-was our life. He’s too good for that. He’s such bright light, he blinds me sometimes. I can’t seem to think straight when he’s around. It’s so hard to breathe. Is that normal? Should I see a doctor?”

 

Jongin inched a little closer.

 

“When I see him I get this feeling that I can’t explain. It makes my heart beat like crazy, I feel like it there are butterflies just fluttering in my stomach and I feel really warm all over. Maybe I’m sick? It’s impossible to be allergic to a person, right? But when he leaves, I feel like I’m missing something. I’m just rambling now, sorry. It’s so easy to talk to you, even now…”

 

Jongin placed a hand over his mouth.

 

No no no no no, Chanyeol was right….

 

“Well, I guess I’ll go now,” Sehun fisted a handful of snow, “I miss you, Kai. I’ll see you again soon, angel. Wait for me.”

 

When Sehun stood and turned around he was surprised to find Jongin standing right in front of him. The glossiness in his eyes made Sehun panic.

 

“Jongin, what’s wrong? Are you okay?”

 

Jongin nearly choked at how worried Sehun sounded. How could he have been so blind?

 

“Sehun...you c-.”

 

He was cut off by a strong force pushing him to the ground. The sound of a gunshot echoed throughout the nearly empty graveyard.

 

“Jongin, watch out!”

 

Jongin turned to the sound of his boyfriend's voice from a distance.

 

“Chanyeol? Wha-”

 

Another gunshot.

 

Jongin couldn’t even scream, the sound caught in his throat. Chanyeol’s body fell to the ground a few yards away from where Jongin sat in the snow.

 

“Oh god, Chanyeol was shot. Sehun, we have to c-.”

 

Jongin’s chest felt like it was being stabbed over and over and over again. He couldn’t move, not a single muscle.

 

Pure shocked took over his body as his eyes shifted from the red on the snow, to the red on Kai’s headstone, to the red on Sehun’s motionless body.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jongin has to make a tough decision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)

Sehun had been shot.

 

Chanyeol had been shot.

 

“Sir?”

 

Sehun was being carried away to an ambulance.

 

Chanyeol was being carried away to an ambulance.

 

“Sir?”

 

Sehun was lying perfectly still on the stretcher.

 

Sehun was covered in deep red blood that continued to leak from the hole in his chest.

 

Sehun was shot protecting Jongin.

 

“Sir?”

 

Chanyeol had been shot.

 

Sehun had been shot.

 

Sehun had been shot…

 

“Sir?!”

 

“Huh?” Jongin finally noticed the paramedic standing in front of him.

 

Sighing, the man spoke, “Sir, I know you must be shocked, but we are taking the patients to the hospital now. What’s your relation to them?”

 

Jongin eyes went over to where the other paramedics were lifting Chanyeol into the emergency vehicle.

 

“Chanyeol is my boyfriend.”

 

The man nodded, “And the other?”

 

Jongin dragged his attention to Sehun who was also being loaded into the ambulance.

 

“He-Sehun’s is my…”Jongin’s throat tightened, “...Sehun...he..he’s my…”

 

The dancer closed his eyes tight and took deep breaths. He was having the hardest time getting out his words and he didn’t understand why. Why was his struggling so much? The question was so simple. All he needed to do was tell the other male who Sehun was to him.

 

So, if only he could just …

 

Exhaling slowly, Jongin tried one more time, “Sehun is a friend.”

 

The paramedic nodded, “Okay. Well, we will get you checked out on the way to the hospital. Please, come this way.”

 

Jongin was halfway to the ambulance when his brain finally registered that he was being led further and further away from where Sehun was.

 

He abruptly stopped walking, “Where are you taking me?”

 

The paramedic spoke carefully, not wanting to startle a person who just saw two people get shot.

 

“It’s okay, Mr. Kim. We are just getting you to the hospital too. I’m guessing you would like to ride with your boyfriend on the way there.”

 

The confused looked on Jongin’s face made the paramedic think twice about his logic, as if what he assumed made no sense at all.

 

“I mean...unless you prefer to ride with your friend.”

 

Jongin didn’t miss the question in the man’s tone. He didn’t believe that a person would choose to be at a friend’s side over their lover’s.

 

He’s right.

 

They wouldn’t.

 

He shouldn’t.

 

“No, I’ll ride with my boyfriend.”

 

Jongin turned and started back toward Chanyeol’s vehicle.

 

The paramedic pretended not to see the hesitation in the dancer’s eyes.

 

~.~.~.~

 

“Hunnie, be careful. I don’t want you to fall.”

 

8-year-old Sehun titled his head back, hands still tightly grasping the rails of the jungle gym he adored so much.

 

“Don’t worry, Daddy. I’m okay.”

 

Sehun continued his mission to get to the very top. He would not give up. After a few more feet of the ground, he finally made it.

 

He was so happy, “Look, Daddy. I made it!”

 

Sehun felt like he was the king of the world when his father smiled up at him, with so much pride in his eyes.

 

“You’re the best, Sehunnie! So cool!”

 

The little boy’s smile was so big and bright.

 

But like always, Sehun couldn’t stay happy for long.

 

“Jump down from there! We’re going home now!”

 

Sehun looked over at his worst nightmare, his little heart already beginning to beat against his small chest.

 

“Yes, mother,” he whispered.

 

Boa glared up at her pathetic excuse for an offspring. She watched him slowly and carefully start to climb down from the top of the jungle gym.

 

“Ya! Didn’t you hear me? I said jump down. Jump!”

 

Sehun looked back, eyes wide with fear, “But, mother. It’s too high.”

 

“Honey, pl-.”

 

“Shut up, Yunho. I didn’t ask for your input,” the woman snapped, “Sehun, don’t look at him. He can’t save you this time. Stop being a wimp and do what you are told. Jump down here. Now.”

 

Sehun was scared. He didn’t want to hurt himself.

 

Eyes glanced once more at his mother and then finally..

 

He let go.

 

~.~.~

 

Sehun’s eyes fluttered open. He groaned as his eyes adjusted to the bright light.

 

He looked around the white room. By the beeping machines and the smell of sterilizers and bleach, Sehun concluded that he was in a hospital.

 

He hadn’t been to one in years. He preferred to take care of his own injuries at home. Hospitals were for people who were either sick or dying.

 

Sehun was neither of the two.

 

Not yet, at least.

 

The dark haired male sat up, muscles screaming at the sudden premature movement. He would ignore it though. He had been in worse pain. A shot wound was nothing.

 

Then he remembered why he had been shot in the first place.

 

Jongin!

 

“Jongin!”

 

Sehun ripped the wires off of his chest and was about to pull IV right out of his arm when a doctor quickly entered the room.

 

She rushed over to Sehun’s side and gently, yet firmly, tried to keep him down.

 

“Hey, hey, hey, It’s okay. Everything is okay, Mr. Oh.  Please, stop moving. You need to rest, please.” she cried.

 

“No, what I need is to see Jongin. Where is here? Is he okay? Is it hurt? Let go of me, you bitch!” Sehun yelled.

 

Other doctors and nurses were now rushing in to assist their co-worker. Three men held Sehun still, while the female doctor stuck a needle in Sehun’s arm and injected him with something that made his whole body quickly relax.

 

Once they were sure Sehun wasn’t going anywhere they left the room, leaving the initial doctor alone with the dazed assassin.

 

She calmly hooked Sehun back up, careful not the put too much pressure on his chest wound.

 

“Mr. Oh, I’m Doctor Im, but you can call me Yoona if you like.”

 

Sehun looked up at his doctor, eyes threatening to close at any moment.

 

“Yoona...that’s a pretty name. I like that name,” he mumbled

 

Passing the comment off as one of the many flirtatious passes she gets during the day, Yoona simply nodded and began unraveling Sehun’s bandages.

 

“It’s my little sister’s name.”

 

Yoona smiled, “Oh, yeah? How old is she?”

 

Sehun blinked, eyes staying shut a little longer than normal, “16.”

 

Yoona disposed of the bloody wraps and retrieved fresh ones, “So she is in high school, yeah?”

 

Sehun lazily shook his head, “No. She doesn’t go to school.”

 

“Oh? Why is that? She’s home-schooled?”

 

“She’s dead.”

 

Yoona froze. She wasn’t expecting that at all.

 

Sehun didn’t hear the doctor comment, but he continued anyway. “She died when she was four. She would have been 16 this year.”

 

Sighing at how heavy the conversation had turned, Yoona finished up her work. She pulled back and looked down at Sehun. His eyes were closed and his chest rose and fell at a calming pace.

 

She didn’t want to wake the patient so she quietly finished her paperwork and turned to leave.

 

“Yoona...”

 

Yoona stopped and looked back at Sehun. His eyes were open, but they didn’t seem to be focused on the doctor at all.

 

“Yes?”

 

“Bring me Jongin. I want to see him. I need him...Please... Yoona, will you show him to me?”

 

Yoona would have been stupid to not notice the desperation in Sehun’s voice. Whoever this person was must have meant a lot to her patient. She also noticed how no family or friends had come to claim Sehun or even check on him, although it’s been hours since he arrived at the hospital.

 

“Sure, Sehun. I’ll get him for you.”

 

A sleepy smile appeared on Sehun’s face, “Thanks, Yoona. I think my little sister would have turned out to be kind like you.”

 

Yoona watched Sehun’s eyes fall shut before leaving the room.

 

~.~.~.~

 

Jongin sat quietly at Chanyeol’s side, holding an empty styrofoam cup between both hands.

 

He had finished the coffee a long time ago, but his mind was preoccupied with other matters.

 

Matters like his wounded friend that he still hadn’t gone to see.

 

But, how he go see Sehun right now? How, when he was so confused about everything even related to the latter. No, he couldn’t see Sehun. Not until he sorted out these new feelings he wished would just go away.

 

“Nini…”

 

Jongin rested a hand on Chanyeol’s. He didn’t miss the smile that formed on his boyfriend’s peaceful face.

 

He chuckled. Even in his sleep, Chanyeol was Jongin’s ‘Happy Virus. He was so loyal and good. Jongin knew that he could rely on Chanyeol. He trusted the officer more than anything. He only hoped Chanyeol felt the same about him. He never wanted to hurt his Happy Virus.

 

Never.

 

Finally deciding that it was time for a coffee refill, Jongin entered the hospital hall, gently closing Chanyeol’s door behind him.

 

He almost to the coffee machine when he overheard some doctors talking.

 

“You should have seen him, Tae. He was so riled up over this guy Jongin. It took like three guys to hold him down.”

 

Jongin froze.

 

“Oh wow, that’s crazy. What are you going to do? Didn’t he ask you to find that person for him?”

 

Jongin should just keep on going. There were plenty of guys named Jongin.

 

“Yeah, he did. I just feel so bad for him. He’s so handsome and-.”

 

“Wait, he’s handsome?”

 

Jongin hands clinched. So what? A handsome man was calling out for a Jongin. That still didn’t mean they were talking about Sehun. They are plenty of handsome men in Korea.

 

“Oh, yes. So so handsome. Dark hair, sharp jaw, perfect mouth, and he’s got these dark eyes that make you feel like he is looking right into your soul.”

 

Jongin knew that feeling all too well.

 

“Wow, I wish I was this Jongin guy. My dream is for a handsome man to look for me.”

 

The doctor laughed, “Okay, Tae, let’s get back to work. Can you help find him or not?”

 

“Well, there is no patient registered with that name. Did he say anything that could point us in the right direction?”

 

“No. Just that he needed him.”

 

Jongin sighed. He was an idiot and he should really just get his coffee and go back and wait for Chanyeol to wake up.

 

However…

 

“Hello, I’m Jongin. Sehun’s my friend.”

 

~.~.~.~

 

Sehun watched with tears in his eyes as his father hovered over his sister’s lifeless body. He had seen his father cry before, but not like this.  

But nothing compared to the lost of a child. At 10 years old, Sehun understood that.

 

He didn’t want to cry thought, because it showed emotion, and ‘Emotions was a weakness.’

 

He knew his father was a weak man, it was literally yelled on a daily basis. What he didn’t know was why his father seemed completely content with being seen as vulnerable. No one respect his father, not like they did with his mother.

 

His mother was a strong. She knew what she wanted and she did whatever she had to do to achieve her goal. It didn’t matter who she had to deceive or hurt. No one mattered in her eyes.

 

Not her husbands. Not even her children.

 

She had many people who looked up to her though. Many people who admired her morals and views, so, to Sehun, she was a role model.

 

He had to be strong too.

 

He had to be like her.

 

When Sehun opened his eyes he stared at the ceiling for a short while. He didn’t know why he was suddenly recalling memories of his childhood, but if he had control of the matter, he would rather not.

 

It had taken Sehun years to realize that his mother was nowhere near a good person, but by then it was too late. Sehun had already become a heartless killer, sympathizing for no one. If Sehun had never met Kai, he probably would have been a lot worse too.

 

Kai never discourage Sehun’s way of doing things, he embraced it actually. Whenever Sehun killed there was a light it Kai’s eyes that was of pure awe. Sehun loved it so much.

 

Love….

 

Sehun glanced around the room. He couldn’t stop the smile from forming on his lips.

 

Jongin truly looked like an angel standing in front of the window like that now. The brightness from the outside shone through and surrounded the dancer in such a heavenly light.

 

When Jongin heard Sehun shuffle, he turned to look at him, knocking what little Sehun air had right out of his lungs.

 

It was unbelievable how beautiful Jongin was. Did he realize how much he affected Sehun?

 

“Jongin..you’re okay.” Sehun breathed.

 

Jongin looked shocked, then confused, and then he looked away.

 

Sehun’s eyebrows knitted together. Did something happen?

 

“You are okay...right?”

 

Jongin sighed, “Yes, Sehun. I’m fine. How do you feel?”

 

“Well, I’ve been worst,” Sehun chuckled, wincing at a sharp pain.

 

“Don’t hurt yourself.”

 

Sehun smiled at the concern in Jongin’s voice. It was nice to know that someone cared,“Really, Jongin,I’m okay. This is nothing.”

 

“It’s not nothing, Sehun. You were shot.” Jongin frowned.

 

“Like I said, I’ve been worst.”

 

It fell silent after that, nothing but the steady beeping of the heart monitor filled the room.

 

Finally Jongin spoke, but his eyes were on the floor.

 

“Well, I’m glad you’re okay, but I should really get back to Chanyeol.”

 

Sehun watched as Jongin quickly walked toward the door, fist clinched.

 

“Wait. Jongin, wait.” Sehun called out.

 

Something was off. Jongin seemed upset.  

 

The dancer stopped, but didn’t turn around.

 

“What’s wrong?” Sehun didn’t understand what he did wrong, but he had to fix it. He couldn’t have Jongin mad at him. He would die for sure. He needed Jongin’s smile more than air.

 

“Nothing.”

 

“Don’t lie to me,” Sehun begged, “Please.”

 

“How can you pretend like nothing's wrong?” Jongin whispered, head hung low.

 

Sehun shook his head, “I don’t understand. Everything is okay.”

 

“No!” Jongin shouted, spinning around to look at Sehun directly this time.

 

Sehun’s heart broke at the sight of the dancer.

 

Jongin’s eyes were red, his eyelashes were wet, obviously due to the tears that were running down his pink cheeks, and his face was twisted up into a painful expression.

 

“Jongin, I thought you said you were okay. Were you hurt?”

 

Jongin let out a frustrated groan, “No, but you were! You were shot, Sehun. Why are you only concerned for me when you are the one laying in a hospital bed?”

 

Sehun looked away, “You’re more important.”

 

“Why?”

 

“ I have to keep you safe. No matter what the cost.”

 

Jongin’s face fell. “Even your life?”

 

“Yes.”

 

Sehun didn’t expect Jongin’s next question.

 

“Sehun, are you in love with me?”

 

“What?” Sehun’s eyes were now on Jongin. He wondered if the dancer was just joking, but frown on his face was all confirmation he needed.

 

After a few more moments of silence, Sehun realized that Jongin wasn’t going to be satisfied until he got an answer.

 

“I think so.”

 

Jongin let out a deep sigh, “Sehun, I’m with someone.”

 

Sehun looked away again,“I know.”

 

“I can’t return your feelings.”

 

His jaw clenched,“I know.”

 

“We can never be together.”

 

Sehun winced at the pain that shot through his chest. Maybe it was the bullet wound, maybe it wasn’t. Either way Sehun tried his best to fight through it.

 

“I know.”

 

“Do you really?”

 

Sehun closed his eyes and exhaled. Then he turned back to Jongin.

 

“I know, Jongin,” Sehun confirmed, “I know, but I’m fine with that. Being at your side as your friend is enough for me.”

 

Jongin breath caught and his hand covered his mouth. His eyes began to fill with tears once more, but he quickly pulled himself together.

 

“We shouldn’t be friends anymore, Sehun.”

 

Sehun sat up, ignoring the pain, “Yes, we can, Jongin. You don’t have to do that.”

 

Jongin shook his head, “I do. I’m with Chanyeol.”

 

“And I’m okay with that. I won’t try to come between you two.”

 

“But you already have, Sehun.”

 

Sehun looked up at Jongin, “You don’t have to do this.”

 

Jongin bit his trembling lip, “Goodbye, Sehun. Please don’t appear in front of me again.”

 

Sehun tried to grab Jongin before he got away, “Please, don’t do this!”

 

Jongin opened the door and ran out.

 

“JONGIN!”

 

Sehun launched himself out of bed, his legs not strong enough to hold him up.

 

“Jongin! Don’t do this!”

 

Sehun tried with all his might to pull himself closer to the door, but his arms just weren't working with him.

 

“Please! Jongin!”

 

Yoona suddenly rushed into the room. She quickly dropped down to help her patient, but Sehun didn’t seem to realize she was even there.

 

“Jongin! Don’t leave me!”

 

Yoona saw the tears running down Sehun’s face and her immediate reaction was to pull his head close to her chest.

 

“Shhh, Sehun.” she hushed, her fingers smoothing his deranged hair back.

 

“Please, don’t leave me…”  

 

Yoona tightened her hold on the broken male as his body finally collapsed from all the strain he had put on it.

 

“...don’t leave me…..”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Being without Sehun was harder than Jongin anticipated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)

Jongin fell against the balance bar...again.

 

“Damn it!” he swore.

 

He had been messing up his routine all night and it was really getting under his skin. The dance wasn’t easy by far, but Jongin wasn’t an amateur dancer so he should have been able to complete the routine with ease.

 

So why was he failing so miserably? He just didn’t get it.

 

Jongin started from the beginning once again, ignoring his screaming muscles telling him that he had been practicing for hours and needed a break.

 

But Jongin refused to take a break. Not until he got the routine down.  

 

The dancer spun around and around, eyes watching the mirror like a hawk. His posture was perfect, as usual, his rhythm spot on.

 

He moved on to the final dip. His leg gracefully rose toward the ceiling, toes pointed up like the experienced ballerina he was. He let his back fall back slowly, keeping his balance with ease, and then he used a hand to reach out to the heavens.

 

He closed his eyes for a moment and sighed. He did it.

 

When he opened his eyes the dancer’s heart stopped. Staring down at him were eyes so familiar. So similar to his own.

 

“Kai.”   

 

His twin smiled and yanked Jongin up. The younger of the two was still in shock as Kai grabbed his hand and spun him around.

 

Jongin stopped abruptly, causing a frown to appear on Kai’s face.

 

“Aw, Come on, Nini. You can do better than that. Where’s my beautiful swan?”

 

Jongin’s eyes filled with tears at the nickname, “I miss you.”

 

Kai smiled, “I know.”

 

Jongin tried his best to return the smile as he took his brother’s extended hand. He knew his mind was playing tricks on him. Kai was dead. There was no use in denying that fact, but right now Jongin would forget. He would forget that his brother was no longer able to breathe, no longer able to laugh, no longer able to exist on this earth with Jongin.

 

He would forget all the pain that came along with that fact and live in his moment. This moment where Kai wasn’t dead and where he could just dance with his brother like they use to when they were younger.

 

Jongin felt like he was dancing on clouds. He hadn’t been this happy in weeks. All he’d been able to feel was pain and sorrow. He tried his best to fake a smile. He even succeeded in fooling everyone into thinking that he was fine. But he buried himself into dancing and worked his body to the point that when he got home he would pass out from exhaustion.

 

But he had to. Because if he didn’t, his mind would wander to things Jongin would rather not think about.

 

“You’re sad,” Kai stated.

 

Jongin shook his head, “No, no, I’m happy. I get to see you. I’m so happy.”

 

Kai frowned, “But your heart’s crying.”

 

The younger was going to deny the statement again, but Kai’s hand came up to wipe something wet off of his cheek.

 

“Your eyes are crying too.”

 

Jongin bit his lip, hoping to stop the tears he hadn’t realized had escaped, “I’m sorry, Kai. I shouldn’t be like this.”

 

“You know you don’t have to pretend for me.”

 

“I know,” Jongin smiled sadly, “I really miss you, Kai. I’ve been so confused lately.”

 

“About what?”

 

Jongin looked away. This was wrong. Real or not, he couldn’t possibly tell Kai about his feelings fo-.

 

“Is it because of Sehun?”

 

Mirror eyes met each other.

 

“I’m sorry,” Jongin mumbled.

 

Kai smiled, “Don’t be.”

 

“But you two were lovers. You loved him. He loved you.” As the words left Jongin’s mouth, the dancer couldn't help but feel guilty. He shouldn’t be like this.

 

“And now he loves you.”

 

“I-.” Jongin stepped back.

 

“But you hurt him.”

 

“It’s complicated.”

 

“You abandoned him when he needed you the most.”

 

The dancer shook his head, his feet still carrying him away further away from his vision of his brother.

 

“He’s better off without me.”

 

“He cried out for you and you ignored him.” Kai’s voice grew darker.

 

“He’s safer w-.”

 

“You killed what little happiness he had left in this world because you were too scared to face your own feelings and now he’s dead inside.” the deceased barked.

 

Jongin’s back was now up against a mirror-covered wall. He had nowhere else to go. He couldn’t run away from his thoughts this time.

 

“No, he’ll be okay. He doesn’t need me like he needed you,” he cried.

 

“You’re right, Jongin.”

 

The dancer turned his head toward the new image in the mirror behind him.

 

His heart broke at the sight of Sehun staring back at him with so much pain in his eyes. He looked almost as broken as Jongin felt.

 

“You’re right. I don’t need you like I needed Kai,” the mirage spoke, “I need you so much more.”

 

On his knees, Jongin placed a hand on the mirror, hating that he didn’t feel Sehun’s warmth underneath his fingertips.

 

“Sehun, please forgive me. I can’t love you like you love me.”

 

Sehun frowned and looked away and Jongin’s heart quickened in panic. He rose to his feet.

 

“I never wanted to hurt you, Hunnie, ”Jongin wanted so badly to hold his friend’s hand, “I care about you so much. More than you know.”

 

Sehun still didn’t look at the dancer.

 

Jongin grabbed the material at his chest, hoping that it would stop the breathtaking pain he was feeling right now.

 

“It’s because I care about you so much, that I can’t be at your side anymore. This ungodly pedestal you hold me up on is not right. You can’t care about me more than you do your own life, I won’t allow it.”

 

Jongin continued to speak even though he knew he was basically talking to himself.

 

“You were shot because of me. I know that now and I’m so so sorry, Sehun,” Jongin sobbed, “I never want you to get hurt because of me ever again.”

 

The dancer placed a hand on the mirror where Sehun’s face would have been if he was really standing in front of him.

 

“So, please, Sehun, please take care of yourself and live happily.”

 

The dancer fell to his knees before the reflection of the man who held more space in his heart more than he should have.

 

“Please...I’m begging you, Sehun….”

 

The mirror image shattered under Jongin’s hand, forcing the dancer back into reality.

 

~.~.~.~

 

Chanyeol locked his phone and shoved it into his back pocket. He had been waiting for a reply from Jongin, but more than likely the other was either at the studio still, or already asleep at home.

 

Every day he hoped things would return to how they use to be before Jongin’s birthday.

 

Every day he was let down by the harsh fact that Jongin had changed since that day. No matter what Chanyeol tried, Jongin’s smile didn’t reach his eyes anymore.

 

The detective wanted to believe his boyfriend was simply still in shock from him being shot and hospitalized. Anyone would be emotionally scarred if the person they loved was shot right before their eyes.

 

But Chanyeol wasn’t blind.

 

He saw the distant look in Jongin’s eyes whenever they were in the same room. Jongin was never with Chanyeol anymore. Physically, he was standing right next to him, but internally….Jongin was nowhere to be found.

 

Chanyeol wasn’t deaf either.

 

At night, as Jongin laid wrapped in Chanyeol’s arms, a name fell from his lips. A name that was not Chanyeol’s.

 

That name was the reason Jongin woke up with red puffy eyes, while Chanyeol pretended he was still sleeping. It was that name that made Jongin lock himself in the bathroom for hours, curled into himself, as Chanyeol smiled and acted like he hadn’t been waiting on the other side of the door listening to Jongin’s quiet sobs.

 

It was because of that name that there was a stranger living in Chanyeol’s house, wearing the mask of his dearly beloved.

 

As painful as it was, Chanyeol knew the real reason behind Jongin’s drastic change.

 

And that reason had embedded itself into Chanyeol daily life, like a disease that he couldn’t find the cure for. It was killing his relationship and, lord help him, it was killing his precious Nini.

 

Chanyeol pressed down on the elevator button and ran his hand through his hair as he waited for the next one. The doors had almost closed completely when he noticed the light still on in his boss’s office.

 

He stopped the doors from closing and stepped back out of the elevator. He made his way over to Baekhyun’s office. Through the cracks of the blinds, he could see the smaller male typing away on his laptop, eyes dark with weary as well as something else Chanyeol couldn’t quite pinpoint.

 

He gently knocked.

 

“What is it?” came the chief’s voice. It was different from Baekhyun’s usual cheery voice. But, like Jongin, Baekhyun had been acting strange lately.

 

“Chief, it’s me, Park.”

 

There was a short pause, “What is it, Park?”

 

Chanyeol nearly flinched at the ice in Baekhyun’s tone. It was not like him at all. Chanyeol didn’t like it one bit.

 

“Can I come in, sir?”

 

When he didn’t receive an answer, Chanyeol slowly opened the door.

 

Baekhyun looked drained, his usual creamy smooth skin was tainted with dark circles underneath his eyes.

 

Chanyeol frowned. He was not a fan of the look his boss currently wore. In his opinion, It didn’t suit the Baekhyun he grown to know.

 

“What’s wrong?”

 

Baekhyun looked shocked, Chanyeol didn’t care enough to excuse his bluntness.

 

“What are you talking about, Park? I’m just working.” Baekhyun turned his attention back to whatever he was working on.

 

For some reason, that motion lit a fire in Chanyeol. He was sick of the people around him brushing his concerns aside like he wasn’t smart enough to notice the changes.

 

He did notice! He wasn’t stupid.

 

He could clearly see that Jongin’s light was slowly fading and there was little to nothing he could do to stop it.

 

He could clearly see that Baekhyun had thrown himself into this new project of his and it was taking a huge toll on him.

 

Chanyeol noticed everything, so why did it seem like he was being overlooked.

 

“Don’t lie to me, Baek, please. I can’t take any more lies.”

 

Fingers froze above the keyboard. Baekhyun slowly looked back up at his subordinate. He didn’t miss the unspoken pain laced in Chanyeol’s statement.

 

“Are you okay?”

 

Chanyeol flopped down in the chair in front of Baekhyun’s desk, “I would be perfectly okay if the people I cared about would just stop lying to me and tell me what’s wrong. I only want to help, but I can’t fix something I can’t see. God damn it!”

 

Baekhyun eyes took in the scene before him. Chanyeol looked utterly defeated.

 

“Is everything okay with Jongin?” Baekhyun asked softly.

 

Chanyeol sighed, “We’re not talking about Jongin right now. We’re talking about you. What’s wrong, Baekhyun? What has you locked up in here late at night and shutting everyone out all of a sudden?”

 

Baekhyun said nothing. He just stared at Chanyeol.

 

Chanyeol let out a bitter laugh, “Okay, I get it now. I’ll leave you alone.”

 

The detective had his hand on the door when Baekhyun jumped up.

 

“I’m trying to find the person who shot you!”

 

Wide eyes met sad ones.

 

“What?”

 

Baekhyun sighed and placed his face in his hand, “I’ve been trying to figure it out for two months now, but I’m getting nowhere. Every time I think I’m getting closer I run into a dead end and I-. It’s so damn frustrating, you know. It’s ironic really, I’m supposed to be getting an award tomorrow night from the mayor for ‘turning things around’, but I can’t even solve a simple shoot and run case. It should be easy, so why-. Why can’t I find the person who did this to you? Why can’t I look that fucker in the eyes and watch the life in them drain as I-.”

 

Baekhyun’s rant was cut off by long arms caging him in a warm embrace.

 

“Thank you, Baekkie.” Chanyeol mumbled into the shorter’s hair, “Thank you.”

 

Baekhyun’s arms tightened around his subordinate as he tried to hide the tears that began to fall down his flustered cheeks.

 

~.~.~.~

 

Jongin stared at the bouquet of roses that Chanyeol had left for him. The note was simple, a quick ‘I love you. Happy White Day. See you tonight.’ was scribbled in Chanyeol’s signature 4th-grade handwriting.

 

A small smile spread across the dancer’s face. Chanyeol still made him happy, that hadn’t changed. He was still the best friend Jongin fell in love with. Even though Jongin knew he hadn’t been acting like it lately, he still loved Chanyeol.

 

It’s been 2 months exactly since his birthday, but the events of that day were so fresh. He remembered every single detail as if it were a story he made up. It’s been two months of seeing Sehun’s face only in his dreams.

 

The thought pricked Jongin’s heart. He didn’t realize that not seeing his friend would affect him like this. He had gone years without seeing Taemin and the longing was nowhere near this. Nowhere near.

 

Jongin decided that he should place the roses outside on the balcony. It was spring after all, and flowers should be basking in the sunlight. The dancer looked around, taking in the sounds of the city, the cars passing, the people walking, just everything. It seemed like it had been forever since Jongin had been part of the real world.

 

It was beautiful.

 

Jongin sighed. He missed it. Living. He had felt closed off lately, but it was time he got back to reality. He was not alone.

 

Sehun was a friend. Nothing more. He needed to stop acting like he was going through a breakup. Friends didn’t weigh this much on people’s hearts.

 

The knock on the door brought Jongin out of his thoughts. When he opened it, a delivery man was holding a small white bag.

 

“Kim Jongin?”

 

The dancer nodded and the man placed the white bag in his hands and then left.

 

Jongin shut the door behind him and made his way to the couch. He sat down and tucked his legs under him. He smiled at the gift bag.

 

Chanyeol…

 

Inside the bag was a red box and a note. Jongin opened the box first. His eyes widened at the heart-shaped locket that rested beautifully inside. As if the necklace was made of glass, Jongin’s fingers brushed gently over the designs in awe. How could something so simple be so intriguing?

 

He finally lifted the necklace out of its box to examine the piece of jewelry even more. The way it sparked in what little sunlight fill the apartment, told Jongin the necklace was crafted from something expensive.

 

He would kill Chanyeol for spending this kind of money on him. He didn’t deserve it, especially not now. He had been the worst.

 

The dancer turned the necklace over to find words engraved into the metal.

 

‘You are both my biggest weakness and greatest strength’

 

Jongin blinked the tears away, not sure when he started crying in the first place.

 

One sentence sent a million and one emotions right into Jongin’s heart. For the first time in the years, he’s been with Chanyeol, the dancer was caught off guard. Chanyeol had always been the perfect boyfriend, a real-life Prince Charming. Everything he did made Jongin feel like he was in a fairytale. Everything was so cliche and Jongin loved it, but this...those words weren’t from a storybook.

 

The sentence was neither black or white, but grey. It was both beautiful and tragic. It was from the darkest parts of a person full of light, or from the brightest parts of the darkest person. It was real.

 

Jongin shifted his attention to the note. Before even reading the words he recognized the admirable handwriting that could have been an art in itself.

 

He closed his eyes tightly. This was a dream. It had to be. That’s the only time his friend haunted him.

 

Taking a deep breath, Jongin read the letter.

 

Jongin,

 

I’m sorry for reaching out to you. I promise after this you will not hear from me again just like you asked. I’ve been trying to give you this necklace since Christmas, but here it is March and it’s still sitting here on my desk without a home. I wanted to put it on you myself, but every time I tried something happened. The timing was never right, not Christmas, not your birthday.

 

Jongin flinched at the mention of his birthday.

 

I’ve decided to take my loss and simply mail it to you. I hope it gets to you on White Day. I want the day to be special, even if this necklace is not. I had this made in my vision of you. I’ve never been good with words, but after telling a jeweler about you, he was able to create something even half as beautiful as you. To see those two hours I spent trying to find the words to describe you transformed into something so small and so perfect is amazing. They are some talented people in this world. So, here you go, Jongin. I hope this relayed even a fraction of my feelings, but if it didn’t, it’s not like I would ever know.

 

Goodbye Jongin. For your sake, I hope we never cross paths again.

 

The note slightly crumbled in Jongin’s hand. The bastard didn’t even sign his name. Did he think it wasn’t important? That after a while Jongin would simply forget who wrote him the letter all together? Impossible.

 

Jongin looked at the necklace in his hand and then put in on.  He stood up and found the closest mirror. He placed a hand on the cold piece of jewelry. It was perfect. So…

 

“Sehun, you beautiful creature...”

 

~.~.~.~

 

Luhan’s eyes scanned the crowd naturally. For the most part, the ballroom was filled with government officials and other rich citizens. However, Luhan recognized a few members from smaller gangs mixed in with the civilians. That was normal though, whenever a charity event took place, many members of the underground world showed their faces masked as kind and caring people in order to gain further business prying on the dark twisted minds of the rich and elite.

 

Luhan was one of those masked people.

 

His target was currently laughing and drinking while young beautiful women surrounded him. Luhan smirked at the wife of his target. She stood not too far from his husband, her stare filled with so much hate.

 

It was entertaining for the deer-eyed hitman.

 

Taking one last sip of his drink, Luhan started toward his target. As he pushed his way through the crowd he regrettably bumped into a familiar face.

 

“Luhan?”

 

Luhan took a step back from his old ‘friend’, “Jongin, what are you doing here?”

 

The dancer looked hurt from the venom in Luhan’s question, but like the idiot he was he smiled anyway and pretended like he didn’t notice it at all, “I’m Chanyeol’s plus one. His boss is getting an award tonight.”

 

Luhan didn’t respond. Honestly, he didn’t hear a word Jongin said. His mind was filled with the events of what occurred last time he had seen the other.

 

(2 Months ago)

 

Luhan had rushed to the hospital the moment he heard what had happened.

 

He knew he was being dumb and that Sehun neither needed nor wanted his company, but he didn’t care. He just wanted to see the other and make sure he was okay. Sehun had been shot before, all of them had, it was basically part of the job, but Sehun was shot protecting someone.

 

That had never been the case in any of the past shooting. If Sehun was shot, he was caught off guard, getting hit in either the arm or the leg. It was never major.

 

But he was with that damned Jongin and Sehun did a lot of stupid things when it came to the dancer. It was like his years of training and killing few out the window and all he could think about was protecting that damned Kai look alike.

 

Blinded by his thoughts Luhan ran right into Jongin.

 

Speak of the devil.

 

Luhan wasn't the only one loss in his thoughts, it seemed like Jongin was too. But unlike Luhan, the dancer looked like he had been through hell and back.

 

Too bad Luhan didn’t care enough to ask the crying male what was wrong. He was actually happy Jongin was upset, payback for all the pain he and his brother caused him.

 

“Luhan...I...please take care of Sehun…please.”

 

Luhan was curious now, “What are you talking about, Jongin?”

 

“He’s in pain...but I can’t do this anymore. I can’t stay around someone so...so selfless. It scares me.so much. What am I going to do if something like this happens again? What if next time he doesn’t…”

 

Luhan knew where Jongin was going and he didn’t want to think about it either. He didn’t know what he would do if Sehun was killed. The thought itself made Luhan’s eyes began to tear.

 

He shook his head, “Okay, so what are you planning on doing?”

 

“I think it’s best if he and I don’t see each other anymore. It’s better for him. He needs to know that his world shouldn’t revolve around a single person. No one’s life is more important than his own.”

 

‘He knows that, idiot. You and Kai are the only ones Sehun puts above himself!’ is what Luhan wanted to scream.

 

“I think that would be for the best too. You’re no good for him.”

 

Jongin looked as if he had been slapped and Luhan smirked. Had Jongin been hoping Luhan would disagree and beg him to stay at Sehun’s side?

 

Absolutely not.

 

“Oh…”

 

Luhan nodded, “Yeah, you’re the reason Sehun was shot. He’s only ever in danger when you're around.”

 

Jongin swallowed hard and Luhan knew his words had gotten to him.

 

“Yeah….,” he started walking past the deer-eyed male, “Just...don’t let him fall…”

 

Luhan clinched his fist.

 

He hated Jongin.

 

He hated Kai.

 

They made Sehun weak. Sehun was a king. He didn’t need anyone holding him down.

 

Luhan would do anything to watch his king shine.

 

“Luhan?”

 

“Hm?” Luhan blinked.

 

“What are you doing here?” Jongin asked. More than likely for the second time.

 

“Working.” the assassin answered.

 

Jongin’s eyes met the floor, “Is..um...is he….”

 

Luhan scoffed, “No, Sehun isn’t here too. Yes, he is doing just fine.  Have a nice night, Jongin.”

 

He didn’t have time for Jongin. Being in front of the dancer really had Luhan on edge for some reason.

 

Just as Luhan made it all the way across the room to his target the main double doors opened and two men dressed in nicely tailored suits walked in. They were extremely handsome so of course, they stole the attention of many of the women and men, but the reason for Luhan was not the same as everyone else’s.

 

“Well, shit.”

 

~.~.~.~

 

Jongin followed the gaze of the crowd.

 

Oh no…

 

Sehun was dressed in all black, his hair slicked back, and his eyes looked even darker than before. Which until now, Jongin thought had been impossible.

 

Even so, Sehun was sinfully beautiful. Jongin had to remind himself to breathe.

 

It didn’t take long for Sehun’s gaze to shift over to his. It never did. It was like the moment the other walked into a room, everyone else seemed to disappear. Jongin didn’t understand it then, he brushed it off as Sehun just being really attractive.

 

But after these couple of months, Jongin realized that he felt connected to Sehun somehow. Even though he was not interested in being in a romantic relationship with the handsome male, he felt like Sehun was a huge part of his life. This separation wasn’t a good idea, seeing Sehun now, in person, made that very clear.

 

He just hoped that Sehun would forgive him.

 

He needed Sehun to forgive him.

 

Without even thinking, Jongin had made his way closer to where Sehun was standing next to a man who was a little taller than him.

 

Before Jongin reached him, Sehun turned away and followed the other male away.

 

The dancer froze.

 

Why did Sehun leave? He had surely seen Jongin too, so why…

 

“Nini,” Chanyeol grabbed his arm, “I’ve been looking for you all over. Where did you go?”

 

Jongin eyes were still locked on Sehun who was talking calming to the male he arrived with. What was Sehun even doing here? Who was that man he was with? Why did Luhan lie to him? How could Sehun just ignore him like that? Was he mad at Jongin? Were things over between them? Did Jongin completely ruin their friendship for good?

 

A million questions flooded the dancer’s mind. None of them Jongin had the answer to.

 

“Nini?” came Chanyeol’s voice again.

 

“Sorry...I um...sorry. I had gone to the restroom, and then ran into Luhan and then Se-..”

 

“Hey, is that Sehun?” Chanyeol cut off.

 

Jongin didn’t answer. What would he have said anyway? Clearly, it was Sehun.

 

“Who’s that man he’s with? Wait. Why are they talking to Baekhyun?,” Chanyeol moved quickly, “Here, follow me.”

 

Jongin didn’t even have time to object. Chanyeol pulled him along with ease.

 

“Baekhyun.”

 

The small chief paused his conversation, “Oh, Chanyeol hey.”

 

“Hey,” Chanyeol looked over at Sehun, “Hello, Sehun.”

 

Sehun nodded, “Detective.”

 

Chanyeol rose an eyebrow. That was different. Sehun never seemed to care about Chanyeol’s title before.

 

Jongin was thinking the same thing.

 

Chanyeol cleared his throat, “So..you two know each other?”

 

Baekhyun glanced at Sehun briefly, “A little.”

 

Chanyeol nodded, but he sensed the tension in the air. However, he wouldn’t call his boss out in front of everyone. He would talk to Baekhyun privately.

 

He turned to the stranger standing in between Sehun and Baekhyun. He put out a hand, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude. I’m Detective Park Chanyeol. Baekhyun’s my boss.”

 

The tall man shook his outreached hand and smiled, “I’m Kris, a friend of Baekhyun’s.”

 

“Ah. Nice to meet you, Kris,” Chanyeol stepped aside, “This is my boyfriend K-.”

 

“Kim Jongin. I’ve heard a great deal about you.” Kris said.

 

Jongin’s was shocked “Oh? From…”

 

The dancer’s eyes automatically went over to Sehun. Sehun talked about him? Did that mean he wasn’t mad at Jongin? If that was true, why did Sehun still look at him as if he never knew him at all?

 

“Luhan,” Kris finished, “Luhan has told me all about you.”

 

Jongin frowned, “You know Luhan?”

 

“Of course. He is Sehun’s boyfriend.”

 

Jongin flinched. So Sehun and Luhan were together again. He wasn’t surprised. Luhan was beautiful, who could deny him? And Sehun was...

 

“Right.”

 

Kris chuckled, “I’m also their boss.”

 

“Boss?” Chanyeol questioned.

 

“Yes. They both work for me. They are my most trusted and highly skilled employees. Luckily for me, they work just as well apart as they do together.”

 

It fell silent for a moment and then a voice announced that they would be starting the award ceremony soon.

 

“Well, I guess we should be going. Baekhyun, congratulations,” Kris turned to the couple, “It was nice meeting you, Detective. You as well...Jongin.”

 

Jongin nodded, “Likewise.”

 

“Well, Sehun, let’s get going. You all have a nice night.”  

 

Kris and Sehun turned to walk away and without even thinking Jongin reached out and grabbed Sehun’s arm.

 

“Sehun.”

 

Sehun looked down at Jongin, his eyes blank. He didn’t say anything. He simply stared back and the dancer.

 

Jongin’s heart broke. Sehun hated him. That was the only explanation to why he was acting this way. He wanted Jongin to hurt just like Jongin had hurt him.

 

He let go of Sehun’s arm, “Nothing. Sorry.”

 

The dancer watched as Sehun and Kris walked away.

 

I'm so sorry, Sehun….

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sehun couldn't stay away for long

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)

When Jongin grabbed his arm, Sehun was sure his wall was going to crumble that instant. After weeks of fighting and feeling like he was….dying, all of his hard work was going to be for nothing. Jongin was going to break him and Sehun would prove to be the failure he always knew he’d been. 

As long as Jongin remains close to you he will never be safe.…

Sehun winced at the words that had been branded into his mind for weeks. He lived by those words, day in and day out. They were law, his religion. He would give his all to keep Jongin safe. 

And so when he turned and looked down at Jongin’s confused eyes, he pretended to see nothing. He looked into those eyes that held so much power over him as if he was stronger than he really was. As if someone so small and fragile hadn’t been his Achilles heel. 

Using every fiber in his body, Sehun looked Jongin directly in his eyes and lied. 

“Nothing. Sorry.” Jongin mumbled. 

Sehun quickly walked away. The unshed tears in Jongin’s eyes didn’t go unnoticed by the assassin, but for Jongin’s sake, Sehun couldn’t act on his true feelings. 

I’m so sorry, Jongin…

~.~.~.~

Luhan ended up following Sehun outside. The dark haired male looked sick, which worried the Chinese more than anything since Sehun never showed any sort of emotion on his face. 

He grabbed Sehun’s arm, not surprised when the assassin harshly snatched himself away. 

Luhan smiled sadly, “Are you okay, Sehun?” 

Sehun scoffed, “Worry about yourself, 7.” 

As always, Luhan swallowed his heartbreak and forced himself to quietly follow Sehun down the street. Obviously, Sehun knew Luhan was following him, but for some reason, he didn’t say anything. 

Even when it started to rain softly, no words were spoken. Luhan wondered what Sehun was thinking about right now. Was he thinking about Jongin still? About Kris? BTS? Kai? Luhan desperately wanted to know what went through Sehun’s mind. 

 

Sehun stopped at the corner and waited to cross.

Luhan bravely stood at his side. He looked over at the Silent Devil. 

Sehun’s hair that had been slicked back for the party, was now dripping wet in front of his face. The rain that was caught in the hairs of his eyebrows dropped one by one onto his closed lips. 

Luhan was drawn to the other like a moth. 

Sehun was so flawlessly handsome, so alluring, it was unbelievable. Luhan surely had to be insane. He knew just how deadly and unstable Sehun was and yet somehow he still found himself wanting to be close to him.

I must really be crazy. 

The light signaled that they could walk. Luhan started to cross but was yanked back just as a car ran the stop sign. 

The deer eyed male looked back to thank his savior, but Sehun was already walking across the street as if nothing happened. 

“Sehun, wait up,” Luhan called out and he jogged to catch up. 

Of course, Sehun didn’t stop walking. But that didn’t stop Luhan from suddenly linking their arms together and skipping ahead of the stone-faced killer. 

“What the hell are you doing, Luhan?” 

The Chinese couldn’t stop his smile from spreading at the sound of Sehun actually saying his name for once. 

He turned around but didn’t stop walking. His hands wrapped tightly around Sehun’s forearm as he pulled him along, an action he did quite often when they were dating. 

“My apartment’s close to here. Let’s get out of this rain.” 

Sehun’s face slightly switched but otherwise stayed blank, “Are you that desperate to get me into your bed, Luhan?” 

The question was supposed to be rhetorical so it surprised Luhan when he opened his mouth to answer truthfully.

“So desperate.”

The demon’s eyes brow arched as he scanned Luhan’s dripping wet face. 

Luhan’s grip tightened, “Come with me, Sehun. I’ll make you forget everything that’s bothering you.” 

I’ll make you forget about him…

Luhan patiently waited for rejection. Sehun had turned him down at every chance he got. He ignored him, insulted him, made him doubt his worth. 

Sehun was the devil. To his very core, Luhan knew that fact. 

“Promise?” 

Luhan’s eyes went wide. 

Was this really happening? Was it a dream?

Either way, it made Luhan glow with happiness. 

He stepped closer and slowly place a hand on Sehun’s wet cheek. 

“Yes, Sehun. I’ll make you forget.” 

~.~.~.~

Sehun didn’t regret sleeping with Luhan. After all, Luhan was very pretty and Sehun was a man. As much as Sehun hated physical contact, he too had sexual urges that needed to be taken care of every once in a while. 

However, Sehun would never stick around afterward. Once he was done with someone, there was absolutely no reason to linger.

Luhan was no exception to that rule. 

Sehun pulled on his clothes and shoved his phone into his back pocket. He didn’t bother putting the suit jacket back on, so he slung it over his shoulder and left Luhan’s apartment. 

It was around 3 am so the streets were pretty much clear, the casual taxi passing by every now and then. Sehun flagged one down and told the taxi his address. 

On the way, Sehun sat in the back seat nodding his head every few moments at the story the driver was telling him. Of course, Sehun didn’t actually listen to a single word. He was too lost in his own thoughts. 

“So you got someone special in your life, son?” 

Sehun debated whether or not to ignore the question, but what were the odds of him ever seeing the man again. 

“Yeah.” 

The man chuckled, “With your looks, I’m sure she is beautiful.” 

Sehun looked out the window, “He is.” 

“Ah,” the man nodded, “You been together for long?” 

“No, we can never be together.” 

“Oh? Why? Someone else in the picture?” 

Sehun scoffed, “That guy is hardly an obstacle.” 

“Then what’s the problem?” 

“I’ll be happy if we’re together,” Sehun opened his door once they pulled up in front of his apartment building. He swiped his credit card and was about to shut the door when the taxi driver stopped him. 

“Wait! What’s wrong with being happy?”

Sehun’s grip on the door tightened, “If I’m happy...she’ll kill him.” 

~.~.~.~

Jongin stared outside his window at the city cast over by heavy rain clouds. It’s been raining a lot lately, but the dancer didn’t mind. He enjoyed the rain. His best memories included the wet weather. 

He remembered dancing in the rain with Kai when they were kids, kicking and jumping in every puddle they could find. The twins would always get scolded by their mother when they came back home dripping wet and their shoes covered in mud. But it was worth it because she would force them into the shower together for the boys to only horseplay even more. 

Jongin smiled sadly. He would give anything to relive those days again. When everything was simple. When his biggest concern was wondering if he had to sit next to that booger eating kid from the States, Vernon, in math class. 

Life was so complicated now. Every day he worried that Chanyeol would get hurt on police business. He was in constant fear that someone would intrude on his dance classes and hurt one of his precious babies and he would be defenseless against it. He was always disappointed in himself for not visiting his parents since he returned from France, but he couldn’t bear their smiling faces as they looked at him and knew that the better son was no longer.  

Jongin felt like a failure to his students, to his parents, his friends, Chanyeol. And yet, no one ever showed their disappointment in him. It was as if they thought he didn’t know that they preferred better. They wanted someone who was completely unlike Jongin. Someone perfect. 

Someone like Kai. 

But Jongin could never be like his twin. He wasn’t strong or brave like him. He wasn’t good at sports and nowhere near Kai’s level in dance. They were only a few moments apart in birth, but Jongin felt like Kai had always been a lifetime away. 

And now Kai really was, and Jongin would never catch up. 

 

Jongin had thought this need to be as worthy as his brother would disappear when he got accepted to the university in France. As silly as it sounded, he was proud of himself. He had accomplished something not many people could relate to. However, when Kai had told him that he wasn’t interested in going there, or to any college for that matter, Jongin was crestfallen. 

Was getting accepted really special? Did it even matter when his role model displayed zero interest? Kai encouraged Jongin to go even so. 

I want you to live your life far away from here. Nini. There is so much out there for you. Go. 

So Jongin went, and he loved every moment of it. He got to dance, to explore, he met Chanyeol. Everything was perfect, until the day he heard about Kai and his perfect world came crashing down with an ungodly force. 

Jongin sighed and glanced down at his phone. It was late and Chanyeol still wasn’t home yet. That wasn’t abnormal or anything, but some nights more than others, the dancer craved a warm embrace. 

How much longer will you be?

Jongin’s grip tightened on his phone at the clash of lightning, illuminating his empty home. He had no idea why he was so anxious tonight. Storms usually calmed the dancer, but for some reason, he couldn’t stand still. 

Sorry, baby. Almost done here. Are you okay?

Jongin jumped at the roaring thunder. 

Yes. I’m going to take a shower. I’ll see you when you get home. 

Okay, baby. I’ll be there soon. 

Jongin made his way to his bedroom and pulled out a pair of pajamas. He placed his phone on the nightstand just as the screen indicated that he had a message.

I left my key in my other pants. >.< 

Jongin rolled his eyes.

Silly. I’ll leave the door unlocked since I’ll be in the shower. 

Sorry, Nini. Love you. <3

Jongin stared at the text for a few seconds before turning off his screen and placing the phone back down and walking to the bathroom.

The tanned male turned on some classical music before stripping and stepping into the shower. 

He sighed as the warm water ran down his tired muscles, the perfect blend of string and percussion instruments soothing the dancer’s pounding head. His brain throbbed with a million questions and concerns, but he became at ease as his hips swayed to the melody. 

After a few moments, Jongin heard the front door open and close.

“Yeollie, I’m in here still,” he yelled. 

When he heard the door to the bathroom open, a smile spread across the dancer’s face. 

“That was fast, the water is still hot even,” he laughed and started to rinse the shampoo out of his hair, “You wanna join me?” 

The shower curtain was yanked open and suddenly there was a rope around Jongin’s neck. 

The naked male caught off guard was pulled out of the bathtub and onto the cool tile. The force was so strong around his neck he could hardly scream. His fingernails clawed at the enemy’s grip, but black leather gloves prevented him from causing any damage. 

“Hel-.” 

The gloved hand clamped over his mouth, muffling his call. Tears poured from his brown orbs. 

He was going to die. This person was going to kill him. Jongin couldn’t believe it. He was going to be murdered in his home and there was nothing he could do about it. 

Jongin had so much he regretted. So much he wanted to apologize for. To Chanyeol, for not cherishing him like he used to. To his parents, for not being the perfect son they deserved. To Sehun, for pushing him away because he couldn’t fight the feelings the taller made him feel. He didn’t understand and it was overbearing. He pushed Sehun away because maybe he could finally breathe. He felt like he was suffocating when the other was around, and yet he looked forward to spending time with him. Being with Sehun was painful, so why did Jongin welcome that misery with open arms? 

Jongin wanted to know the answer to that question. He had a million questions he wanted to be answered that now he would never have. 

Sehun...take care….

Jongin’s vision started to fade and his heart rate began to slow down. His body fell l limp and his eyes began to close. 

Suddenly, there was a booming noise and then Jongin didn’t feel like he was lacking oxygen. He heard the man’s body fall next to him. His own body didn't even get the chance to touch the floor again because he was quickly pulled into a warm body. 

His eyes slowly open, blinking a few times before he could recognize the familiar dark orbs looking back down at him. 

“Sehun…?”

Jongin was unsure. He couldn't handle if the other was not really with him. Too many times has his friend haunted his mind and played tricks on his eyes. He always saw Sehun, yet the other was never there. 

Sehun eyes were an awful mixture of pain and anger. Jongin had no clue on if the tears in his eyes were of sadness or frustration. 

“Jongin.” Sehun choked. 

Please don't cry…

The dancer wanted to reach out and touch Sehun. And promise him that everything was okay. But for the life of him, he couldn't move. 

“I'm...I'm sor-sorry. Sehun pl-”

Sehun shook his head and tightened the jacket around Jongin’s body, “Shhh. Don't worry about that right now. Don't worry.”

The dark haired male pulled Jongin closer to his chest and began to rock as if he was a nurturing mother. 

“Don't worry, love. I got you. I got you. I got you.” 

Jongin didn't miss the term of endearment, but he also didn't mind it. It caused his chest to burn and his eyes to water, but he didn't mind that either.  

“Sehun...you're really here,” Jongin whispered.

Sehun's brows knitted together in confusion. He ran a hand through Jongin’s wet hair multiple times before caressing his tan cheek. 

“Oh, love. I'll always come for you.” 

Jongin smiled, “Seh-.”

“JONGIN!!”

Chanyeol froze in his tracks before the scene laid out in front of him. A dead body of a stranger on his bathroom floor. Jongin naked and covered in blood splatter, being held by Sehun who had a gun pointed directly at him. 

“Don't come any closer.” Sehun's voice was like death. 

As much as he hated it, Chanyeol knew that Sehun would pull the trigger on him if he moved. Something in the way Sehun held him at gunpoint yet his eyes never left Jongin, led the detective to believe that Sehun was serious. 

Chanyeol stood there and observed. 

The gunshot alarmed neighboring tenants so the police had already been called. Chanyeol could hear the sirens in the distance, but none of that mattered. Not when his boyfriend was in the arms of another man. A man who, Chanyeol knew had saved Jongin, was a killer. Jongin was forehead to forehead with a killer. 

“Detective Park! We got here as quick as we can. What happened?”

Chanyeol clinched his fist when Sehun didn't even look up to acknowledge the law enforcement. 

“That man tried to harm my boyfriend and Sehun killed him. Collect the body and arrest Mr. Oh.”

~.~.~.~

“You have no idea what kind of shit I had to pull out my ass to get you out of here.”

Sehun rolled his eyes, “I don't care either.”

“You know, if Kris hadn't made it seem like life or death, I would have let you sit in there for a bit longer. You look good behind bars.” 

“Fuck off. Let me out already. I need to get to Jongin.” Sehun agreed with the statement. He more than earned himself a permanent home locked away from the rest of the world. But he would pay his dues some other time. Right now, all that matter with being at Jongin’s side. 

“No, you don't. Leave Jongin alone, Sehun. You're going to get him and the people around him killed.”

Sehun scoffed, “I'm sorry I pulled my gun out on your precious ‘Dumbo’. I wasn't going to really shoot him.”

“You're a monster.”

“Tell me something I don't know. Just let me the hell out of here, Baekhyun. I don't have time for this.” Sehun crossed his arms and waited for the police chief to open the gates. 

Once he was free, Sehun pushed passed the smaller male and quickly tried to find the exit. 

“The man you killed had a tattoo on his arm,” Baekhyun called out. 

When Sehun didn't answer, he continued.

“It was a snake. A boa to be exact.”

Sehun's hand tightened on the door but he still didn't comment on the ‘new’ information. 

“But you knew that already, huh? Sehun, what the hell? Are you really willing to risk everyone's life for him? Is he really worth all the deaths that will become of this? She won't stop until she has what she wants. She-.”

“I know, 4!” 

Baekhyun blinked at the sudden outburst. 

Sehun closed his eyes and exhaled, “I know what she is capable of. I know people will die.”

He opened the exit door. 

“But I'll be responsible for a thousand deaths before I risk Jongin's.”

~.~.~.~

Jongin sat on the bed, pillows angled for him to comfortably sit up. 

Chanyeol was all the way on the other side of the bedroom, arms crossed. He hadn't moved since Jongin told him that he didn't want to go to the hospital. Jongin could tell his boyfriend was upset with him. 

“What's the matter, Yeol? I said that I'm fine.”

“Fine? You were attacked, Nini. You aren't fine.”

“But I'm okay. Nothing happened since S-.”

“DON’T say his fucking name,” Chanyeol growled. 

Jongin flinched, “Wha-.”

“Does he make you that happy, Nini. Am I not enough for you anymore?”

Jongin shook his head, “Yeollie, what are you talking about? You're being ridiculous.”

Chanyeol’s jaw clenched, “Am I, Nini? Because it's clear to see you hold some time of feelings for him. You can't deny it.”

Jongin swallowed, “I… I care about Sehun, but only as a friend. I love you Yeollie. You don't have to question that.” 

The dancer was sure everything was going to be okay now. Whenever Chanyeol was concerned about something, Jongin would simply explain himself and all would be forgiven. 

“No, Jongin. I question it with every passing day.”

Jongin's mouth dropped a bit. Was Chanyeol being serious? Was he really saying what Jongin thought he was saying? 

“Yeollie…” 

Chanyeol sighed, “I think we should spend some time apart. I think it will help clear things up for the both of us.”

Jongin was in disbelief. What the actual fuck was going on right now? Was he dreaming? This had to be a dream. The dancer desperately wanted to wake up. 

“Are you serious right now?” Jongin asked, tears threatening to fall. 

The detective closed his eyes, “Yes. I'm going to spend a few days at Baekhyun’s place.”

Jongin’s tears fell on top of the pillow that was clenched in his fist, “Alright, Yeollie. If that's what you need.”

Chanyeol nodded and opened the door to their bedroom, “See you around, Jongin. Take care.”

When the dancer heard the front door open and then shut again, he buried his face in the pillow and cried his heart out.  

~.~.~.~

Sehun was just about to knock on Jongin's front door when it was suddenly yanked open. 

He wasn't expecting to see a fuming Chanyeol standing before him. 

“Why am I not surprised?” The detective spat. 

Sehun didn't bother acknowledging the comment, “Where’s Jongin?” 

Chanyeol scoffed, “Inside. Feel free to let yourself in.”

Sehun was caught off guard by that comment. He didn't know if the other was being sarcastic or if he was being serious. 

When the cop didn't make any movements to stop Sehun from entering the apartment Sehun got his answer. 

“Hey.”

Sehun turned around. 

“I don't know how you got released so quickly and I don't know how you were able to shoot and kill that man so smoothly. The shot was like a professional.”

The cop continued when Sehun simply blinked. 

“I don't trust you at all. I will find out who you really are, Sehun. I may not trust you, but there is one thing I know for sure...You protect Jongin when I can't. I….just keep doing that for the time being. I'll be back for him.”

Sehun didn't get the chance the ask what Chanyeol meant before the sound of muffled cries got his attention. 

He turned toward the bedroom and quickly made his way there. 

Chanyeol sighed and let himself out. 

Sehun gently knocked on the door and opened it. His heart shattered at the sight of Jongin sobbing into a small pillow. 

“Jongin…”

The dancer looked up, his eyes sparkling like diamonds as the light bounced off his tears.

“Sehun...you...how...I thought…”

Sehun approached the smaller male and knelt down next to him. 

“Hey..what's wrong, love?”

“Chanyeol...he...broke up with me.”

Sehun mentally cursed the cop for being the reason Jongin was a mess, “It's going to be okay. I'm here for you.”

Jongin sniffled and repeated the words, “You're here for me.”

“I'll protect you.”

Jongin wiped away his tears, “You’ll protect me.”

“I'll always be by yourself.”

The dancer smiled a little, “You’ll always be by my side.”

Sehun smiled and placed a hand on Jongin's tear stained cheek. 

“I love you.”

Jongin stared down into his friend's pitch black eyes. 

“You….love me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chanyeol is getting closer to the truth about Sehun

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)

The quiet thunder was the first sound Jongin heard when he woke up. Sehun’s sleeping face was the first thing he saw when he opened his eyes. 

His hand went over his mouth to muffle the gasp that tried to escape. He had forgotten that the other had come over the night before. The dancer didn’t remember falling asleep, but he assumed it happened sometime between when he made tea and when they started watching a movie together. 

Once Jongin got over the initial reaction he took in his friend’s facial features. Sehun’s usual serious look was nowhere to be found. It was replaced by the face of someone Jongin never seen before. This person looked content like he didn’t have a worry in this scary world. He didn’t look stressed or anxious, simply...peaceful. 

The dancer really liked that expression. It fit Sehun well. 

Jongin’s mind didn’t register that he had reached out to touch Sehun until he felt the warm skin underneath his fingertips. Against his better judgment, the tanned male traced the sharp outline of Sehun’s face. He familiarized himself with each rise and fall of his friend’s face until he could easily distinguish Sehun with a simple touch. 

The sleeping male smiled and nuzzled into Jongin’s touch and Jongin couldn’t but mirror Sehun’s mile. 

“Kai…” 

Sehun’s soft skin suddenly felt like fire. Jongin held his hand to his chest, his eyes naturally wanting to display the abrupt pain he felt in his chest. 

The dancer was shocked; Why was he touching Sehun to begin with? 

Then he was confused;  Why did he feel so comfortable with his friend laying so close to him? 

Lastly, he was hurt;  Why did he think Sehun had a tiny space in his heart reserved for him when Kai clearly owned it entirely? 

Jongin quietly slid out of the bed and was almost to the bathroom when he heard Sehun shift in the bed. He silently prayed his friend was still sleeping, but of course….

“Jongin.” 

The danced swallowed the large lump in his throat and stretched a wide smile across his face. 

Slowly, he turned face Sehun, “Goodmorning sleepyhead.” 

Sehun frowned, “You okay?” 

Jongin mentally cursed. How did Sehun always seem to see past his facade? But, he didn’t want to make things awkward between them so he continued to lie. 

“Yes. Still just waking up.” Jongin was relieved when Sehun seemed to believe him. 

The taller rose from the bed and ran a hand through his bed hair. Jongin averted his eyes. 

“You need to use the bathroom?” He asked. 

Sehun looked down at his attire and realized he hadn’t changed, “Yes. I need a shower.”

The dancer motioned to the opened door, “Be my guest.”

As Sehun got closer and closer to Jongin, the air in the room seemed to disappear with every step the taller made. 

Finally, Sehun was standing inches away.  Jongin titled his head up to meet those black pearls Sehun called eyes. They were so dark, so alluring, Jongin had to remind himself to breathe. 

That was also a bad idea because when he inhaled again, Sehun’s scent assaulted his nose. How could someone smell so fucking good? 

Jongin tried to blink away his daze, “Um..I..”

Sehun reached up and placed a warm hand on Jongin’s cheek causing the dancer to wince. 

His touch burned. It burned because it didn’t belong to him. Sehun’s touch belonged to Kai. Only Kai had the right to these feelings that wanted to rise within Jongin. 

Jongin turned away, “I’ll make some coffee.”

And with that, the dancer left the room. 

~.~.~.~

Jongin ended up making more than just coffee. Sehun did help him in his time of need, after all, and Jongin wanted to repay with more than just a cup of coffee. 

He heard the water in the bathroom top and he knew Sehun was done with his shower. He placed the finishing plates on the table and began washing the dishes he cooked with. 

“Oh wow.” 

Jongin sighed and turned to his friend’s voice. Sehun was wearing some of Chanyeol’s clothes, but Jongin didn’t remember them looking that good before. 

Stop checking him out, weirdo! 

Jongin’s shook his head and smiled as Sehun’s eyes wandered all of over the table filled with food. 

Sehun looked at Jongin, “You know, you didn’t have to do this right?” 

“I know. I wanted to though. You really helped me out yesterday…,”Jongin thought about the attacker, “Like, emotionally and physically.” 

Sehun didn’t say anything. 

Jongin sighed, “I would be dead if it wasn’t for you, Sehun. I can never repay you for that. Thank you.”

Sehun looked away, “Jongin...you never have to thank me for protecting you.”

“Bu-” 

Sehun voice was deep and serious. He looked directly into Jongin’s eyes. “No, you don’t have to thank me because I don’t do it for you.” 

Jongin didn’t understand. 

Sehun obviously realized that because he explained himself, “I protect you for me, Jongin. I protect you because I can’t inhabit a world you don’t walk on. I couldn't function if something ever happened to you. I would go insane. I’m selfish with the blood that runs through your veins and the breath in your lungs. So, please...don’t thank me.” 

Jongin was speechless. What was he supposed to say? What does one say when they are told that their mere existence is the reason someone else is alive. That was intense, to say the least.  He didn’t realize he meant that much to Sehun. After the other had gotten shot and Jongin decided that they should spend some time apart, the dancer was so sure Sehun had gotten over putting other’s lives above his. 

“Sehun...we talked about this before. You shouldn’t put me on a pedestal. No one’s life is more important than your own. Yo-.”

“I’m well aware of that, Jongin. No one, but you.” 

Jongin shook his head, “Sehun…” 

Sehun looked down as he spoke, “Look, Jongin. We can talk about this all day and my answer still wouldn’t change. So let’s stop, okay? I love you and I will protect you with everything I got. That will never change. No matter what may happen in the future, that will always be true.” 

Jongin didn’t have room to argue because Sehun had already sat down at the table and started eating. The dancer sighed and finished up washing the dishes. 

“I’m going to take a shower now,” he mumbled. 

Sehun grabbed his wrist before he could walk past him. Jongin’s heart was beating so loud as he looked down at Sehun. 

“Hey, don’t think too much about it. I know you can’t love me as I love you. I’m okay with that, I promise. My only concern is your well-being. Don’t worry about me. I’ll be okay.” 

Jongin hated how sure Sehun sounded. Was he that accustom to getting hurt? Why? By who? So many questions with no answers, Jongin didn’t like it at all. 

“Okay.” 

Sehun rubbed his thumb up Jongin’s forearm, “Okay? Don't worry.” 

Jongin bit his lip, “Okay, Sehun.” 

~.~.~.~

Sehun hadn’t felt so calm in years. Because it was still raining, he and Jongin decided to finish the movie they fell asleep on and then continue watching random movies throughout the day. 

Sehun respected Jongin’s words. He understood that the other only saw him as a good friend so the assassin tried his very best to keep the touching to a minimum. He was doing a good job too until Jongin’s head fell carelessly on his shoulder. 

Sehun’s inhaled sharply causing Jongin to immediately jumped back. 

“Sorry,” he mumbled. 

Sehun smiled at the blush that crept onto the dancer’s cheeks. He reached up and gently pushed Jongin’s head back down on his shoulder.

“You’re fine, Jongin. I just wasn’t expecting it that’s all.” 

He heard the smaller mumbled another ‘sorry’ and the assassin shook his head at how cute Jongin could be. It was unbelievable sometimes. 

After a few silent moments watching the tv, the dancer lifted his head and spoke.

“I don’t want to sound weird or anything, but...I’ve never slept in this apartment alone before. Chanyeol has always been…” Jongin trailed off, “Can you stay the night again?” 

Sehun was almost certain Jongin was trying to test his composure. He was doing and saying everything Sehun dreamed he would. Did he still not realize how badly Sehun craved him? Had the man not made himself clear about his feelings?

He must have taken too long to answer because Jongin let out an awkward chuckle. 

“I mean, you don’t have to. I just thought w-.” 

Sehun grasped both of the dancer’s hands in one a single hand, “I would love to, Jongin.” 

Jongin smiled in what looked like relief.

“Thank you.” 

Sehun smiled and rose from the couch. 

“I need to go get some more clothes then.  I probably shouldn’t wear all of the detective’s clothes.” 

Jongin nodded slowly, “Right..” 

“You want to come with me?” Sehun asked. He was hoping the other said yes. The killer didn’t want Jongin to be alone anymore. He couldn’t risk another attack again. Too much was at stake. 

Sehun was disappointed when Jongin started to shake his head. 

“No, I should start straightening up.” Jongin looked so beautiful looking up at Sehun. It was almost painful. 

“I don’t like the idea of you being alone,” Sehun admitted. 

Jongin nodded in understanding, “Then that means you’ll be back soon then...right?” 

Sehun clinched his fist. He didn’t want to argue with Jongin and he also didn’t want to come off as overbearing. He didn’t want to do anything that would make the other push him away again. He had to learn how to sacrifice his peace of mind in order to be able to stay at Jongin’s side. 

“Lock the door behind me.” 

~.~.~.~

 Chanyeol eyes scanned the monitors in front of him. He had been investigating Sehun every since the man was arrested for killing Jongin’s attacker. 

The detective was shocked to see that Sehun’s record was clear as a saint’s. Not even a parking ticket. There was no way someone as mysterious as Oh Sehun had a clean record. Chanyeol was a smart enough detective to know something was off about the other. He just couldn’t put his finger on it. 

A black coffee mug was placed on the desk in front of him. 

Chanyeol looked up and smiled when he saw Baekhyun staring back down at him. 

“Hey, Chief. What are you doing here? I thought you were off today.” 

“Yeah, so what’s your excuse then?” Baekhyun asked with a hint of annoyance in his tone. When Chanyeol had texted him and asked if he could stay at his place for a few days, Baekhyun knew the reason was that of Jongin. 

As much of a nice guy Chanyeol was, he was blind to anyone that wasn’t Jongin. He loved Jongin more than anything, that was clear to the world. A small part of Baekhyun wished that one day he could be as lucky as Jongin. To have someone as pure as Chanyeol put him above all. 

Chanyeol bit his lip and looked back at his computer and Baekhyun’s eyes followed. 

The eyeliner chief frowned, “Why are you looking into Sehun’s files?” 

“I don’t trust him,” Chanyeol answered truthfully. 

Baekhyun tried to hide the worry in his face and mask the distress in his voice, “Why? He was free to go..” 

“That’s what concerns me. How did he get released so fast? Why was he proven innocent so swiftly when he killed a man?”

“A gangster that was trying to kill your boyfriend,” Baekhyun argued. 

The detective sighed, “I know that, but good intentions or not, Sehun shot and killed a man without any precautions. I just feel like more should have been done about it.” Chanyeol continued to click on different files about the man in question. 

The only pieces of information he found were the basics. When and where he was born, his father’s name and he learned that Sehun had a sister. Both the father and sister were now dead. The father killed himself and the sister died due to illness. 

What was strange was that Sehun’s mother’s name wasn’t listed. It was usually the other way around, mother’s name, but no father. 

Strange…

Chanyeol sighed and sat back in his chair, “There’s nothing.” 

Baekhyun knew there would be nothing. Kris had guys like Baekhyun, who worked on the inside they made sure important member’s like Sehun were never caught and wiped their files every chance they got. 

“Maybe you should jus-.” 

Baekhyun was cut off when Chanyeol suddenly started typing again. When the chief got a better look at the file the detective now had up, he withheld his gasp. 

Kim Kai

What the hell was Chanyeol up to? Kai was dead so why was he looking into his file. How much did the detective really know about the deceased killer? 

Trying to stay in character, “Who i-” 

“Jongin’s twin.,” Chanyeol continued to search through files and pictures, “He dead now, but Jongin told me that Sehun and Kai were lovers. It can’t be a coincidence that all this death surrounds Sehun. It’s got to be connected.” 

“You think he killed Kai?” Baekhyun wanted to laugh. It was common knowledge of how Sehun worshipped the small assassin. He was like a god to Sehun, his master. Only Kai could control the monster within Sehun. Sehun couldn’t hurt him, even if he wanted to. 

“No Sehun loved Kai more than life it seems.” 

This was all confusing the chief, “Then what are you doing?” 

Chanyeol stopped scrolling and ran his hand through his hair, “I have no idea, Baek. Why am I so obsessed with this?” 

Baekhyun felt bad for his subordinate. He was right. He was completely right about Sehun, but every file was designed to point him in the opposite direction from the truth. Chanyeol was an amazing detective, Baekhyun admired him a lot. 

“What a second. What is this?” 

Baekhyun snapped out of his thoughts and focused on what Chanyeol was pointing at. 

It was an old picture of Kai with Luhan and Kyungsoo. Baekhyun had taken that picture himself actually. It was back when Kai had first joined the gang before Sehun had come along. The trio looked happy, they were happy. Drunk and happy. 

“I didn’t know Luhan knew Kai too. They look close.” 

They were close...

“Luhan is or was Sehun’s current boyfriend. He had also gotten close to Jongin at some point, but Jongin hasn’t mentioned him lately,” Chanyeol started to explain thinking Baekhyun was clueless, “So Sehun dated Kai and Luhan?” 

“Where are you getting at?” Baekhyun finally added. 

“Nothing from that part. I just think it's strange, but look at Kai,” he pointed, “Look at the black peeking out of his pants, on his hip. Looks like a tattoo, right?” 

Baekhyun’s muscles tensed. 

“If I zoom in and enhance the picture, it’s a symbol.” 

The chief’s heartbeat started to speed up. 

Chanyeol pulled up another the file. “It’s the same symbol found on the bodies of numerous gang members from EXO.” 

Baekhyun started to shake his head. No….

“This is EXO’s symbol. Every member of the gang has this symbol tattooed somewhere on their bodies. That means Kai was a member of EXO. He and Sehun were lovers. There is no way Sehun didn’t know. Actually, that’s likely the reason Sehun could kill a man so easily. I knew that wound looked like a professional’s. Sehun must be a member of EXO too!” 

Chanyeol jumped up from his seat and looked at Baekhyun.

“Sehun is an assassin, Baekhyun! And I fucking left him alone with Jongin! I got to go. Send the guys as backup!” 

Before the detective could run out, Baekhyun grabbed his arm in a tight grip. 

Chanyeol looked back at his boss in confused.

“Baekhyun?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emotions can get in the way of reason

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)

“Baekhyun?” 

The chief panicked. What should he do? Chanyeol had put all the pieces together. There was only a matter of time before the detective figured out that the leader of the city’s police department was also part of one of the many gangs who brought havoc down on the citizens. 

Chanyeol would surely not forgive him, Baekhyun would bet his life on that. The taller was hell-bent on doing the right thing and bringing criminals to justices. To the eyeliner chief, that was Chanyeol’s best quality. 

Too bad it was going to get him into big trouble. 

Baekhyun was left with two choices. He could kill Chanyeol right here and now. A bullet between the eyes and a brilliant and creative story that would make Chanyeol out to be the bad guy and Baekhyun, the hero. It would be easy. Too easy. 

Or, the chief could risk his own life by letting the detective go. 

If it was ever brought up that he was aware that someone not in the gang discovered their secrets and did not get rid of the threat, Baekhyun was done for. Kris would have him killed immediately, no questions asked. There was no room in EXO for betrayal. A mere suggestion of disloyalty was enough to have a person put 6 feet under. 

Was the other worth it? 

“Baek? You okay?” Chanyeol asked voice laced with so much concern it made Baekhyun want to puke. 

He let go of Chanyeol’s arm, “I’m fine. I just wanted to say...you’re an amazing detective.” 

The wide-eyed giant smiled, “Thanks, chief. I’m going to save Jongin now. I’ll send for backup if needed.” 

He’ll kill you before you get the chance to call for help….

Baekhyun simply nodded and Chanyeol disappeared from the station. 

Small hands came up to cover a choked cry. Tears spilled over and seeped through the spaces between the male's fingers. 

“Lord, please protect him...please…”

~.~.~.~

Sehun packed a duffle bag full of clothes and toiletries. He was almost certain that he was going to be spending more than just one more night with Jongin. At least, that’s what the assassin had hoped for. Laying next to Jongin was the definition of pure bliss. Sehun felt whole and he didn’t even realize how incomplete he truly was until last night. 

Jongin completely monopolized Sehun’s heart and now was the sole owner of the pitiful organ. He was light. He was air. 

Jongin was life. 

Never in his wildest dreams, did Sehun ever imagined something as unbelievably ethereal as Jongin. The dancer was surely the best thing that had ever happened to Sehun. There was absolutely no doubt about that. 

Sehun grabbed his keys and swung the bag over his shoulder before turning to leave. When he opened the door, two men in ebony suits, dark sunglasses, and black face masks with a gold boa stitched into the material over their mouths stood in front of the assassin. 

However, rather than being surprised, Sehun was rather annoyed. 

“What the hell does she want from me?” he asked almost rhetorically. 

“Stay away from the dancer.” the larger of the two men stated. 

Sehun rolled his eyes, “Not a chance. She can go to hell.” He pushed his way past the men, but one dared to grab his arm. 

The assassin had a right mind to detach that hand from his body as well as its owner’s body. No one laid hands on the Silent Devil. No one living, at least. 

“Sehun, please,” came the voice and Sehun’s eyes widened at the familiar tone. It’s been years since he had heard it. 

“Johnny.”

The man removed his glasses and mask, “It’s been a while, hyung.” 

Sehun’s grip tightened on his bag, “It has. You’re working for her now?” 

Johnny looked guilty, “I have a family now, a wife and baby. She offers them protection in return for my loyalty. I couldn’t turn that down. You understand.” 

“I don’t.” 

“Yes, you do. You know how dangerous this world is. How dangerous she is. Anyone against her turns up dead.” 

Sehun was silent. He did know that fact all too well. His childhood was filled with strict rules and blood. 

Lots and lots of blood. 

“It doesn’t matter anymore. There is nothing she can do to me now. I have nothing.” 

Johnny turned to his partner and whispered something incoherently. The man nodded and left the two old friends alone. 

“There is a rumor going around that she is angry with you,” Johnny said. 

“And? I don’t answer to her anymore. I don’t answer to anyone anymore,” Sehun gritted through clenched teeth. He wouldn’t let his emotions take over his composure. 

We control our emotions, our emotions don’t control us…

Sehun remembered Jongin telling him that a while ago. He would do his best to keep himself together. He had to get back to Jongin, he couldn’t risk anything happening that could keep him away any longer.

Johnny looked at his childhood friend. His bad-tempered, no manners, bully of a friend had grown up to be a monster the evilest of murders even dreaded.  He was controlled by no one and those who were on his side even walked on eggshells around him. With a stone as a heart, Sehun was the most feared killer there was. It was hard to believe he was even human. 

“She says you’ve fallen weak.”

Sehun scoffed, “Hardly,” 

Johnny tried to make real eye contact with the other, “Sehun, I’m serious. She says that you’ve fallen weak. Weak to a dancer with a pretty face.” 

Sehun’s knuckles turned white, “I won’t let her hurt him.” 

The younger heard the malice in Sehun’s voice. His body instinctively shuddered, but he continued, “She won’t hurt him, Sehun. She promised she wouldn’t harm him…,” the man hesitated, “as long as you don’t see him again.” 

“Why!” 

Sehun finally snapped, “Why is everyone so against me being happy. For the first time in a long time, I’m happy, but nothing seems to…,” the man took a deep breath, trying to calm himself. 

His head started to hurt and all he wanted to do was to lay his pounding head on Jongin’s lap as the dancer hummed all his problems away. 

“Sehu-.” 

“I’m leaving now, Johnny. Tell her if she wants to get to Jongin. She’s going to have to kill me first.” 

~.~.~.~

After Jongin has cleaned up the apartment, he decided to cook dinner. He set the table and even lit a few candles on the table. But he immediately blew them back out. 

“This isn’t a fucking date, Nini,” the dancer mumbled to himself.  

He placed the candles back in the drawer and shut it. At the sound of the door opening and closing, Jongin twirled around smiling. 

His smile faltered when the man before him wasn’t the one he was expecting.

“Chanyeol.” 

The detective rushed forward and pulled the smaller male into the tightest hug. He didn’t seem to care that Jongin didn’t return the hug, he continued to bury his face into soft hair and inhale deeply. 

“Chanyeol? I-.” 

“We have to leave.” 

Jongin gently pushed himself away from his ex-boyfriend, “What are you talking about?” 

“I have to talk to you about something. But I want to get you away from here first.”

The worried look on Chanyeol’s face scared the dancer. He stepped closer and looked directly into those eyes he once called his everything. 

“Yeollie, tell me what’s wrong.” 

The detective ran a hand through his hair and turned away. He looked like he still wasn’t going to tell Jongin what was on his mind, but when the tan male reached out and grabbed his hand, he sighed. 

“Sehun’s a murderer, Jongin.” 

Dark eyebrows knitted together in confusion. He heard what the other had said, but the words were jumbled and didn’t make sense in the dancer’s head at all. 

“Wha-.What are you saying?” 

Chanyeol used his free hand and rested it on Jongin’s cheek, “I know it’s hard to understand, but I need you to trust me, Nini. I’ve done the researched and everything has finally come together. He is a member of the gang EXO. The people who killed your teacher and many other innocent people. He’s dangerous, Jongin. Once I get you somewhere safe, I’m putting out a warrant for his immediate arrest.” 

Jongin was shaking his head by the end of Chanyeol’s explanation, “No, no, no, I don’t...you don’t know what you’re saying. Sehun is not a killer. He wouldn’t do something like that. There must be something you’re missing. Go over it again. Go over it again and you’ll see that you are wrong. Sehun is not…” 

 Chanyeol sighed again. Jongin looked pitiful. His eyes were a mixture of disbelief, hurt, and fear. That fear was all the convincing that the detective needed. Somewhere deep down, Jongin feared the possibility that someone he cared so much about had a secret life. 

“Honey, I know you’re scared. But I won’t let anything happen to you,” Chanyeol headed toward their bedroom, “Come on, let’s pack some of your stuff. You’ll stay in a hotel for a few days.” 

Jongin didn’t move. His eyes were wide and wet with unshed tears. 

Why was Chanyeol doing this? Did he really hate Sehun that much to make up such a frightening story about him? All of this just to keep Jongin from being his friend. It was insane. 

The detective emerged again with a cloth shopping bag full of Jongin’s clothes. He walked up and grabbed the dancer’s wrist. 

“Come on, Nini.” 

“Why?” 

Chanyeol looked surprised at the question, “Wha-, didn’t you hear what I said? Sehun is a killer, Nini. You aren’t safe here.” 

The police officer tried to pull the tan one along, but again, Jongin didn’t budge. 

“No. I’m not leaving.” 

“Jongin st-” 

“No! I said I’m not fucking leaving. You are insane!” Jongin tried to get out of Chanyeol’s grasp, but the only thing he managed to do was anger the detective.

“FUCKING STOP IT,  JONGIN! YOU’RE BEING RIDICULOUS!” 

Jongin stopped fighting, but only for a moment. Once he got over his shock of Chanyeol yelling at him, the dancer began to fight against the detective even more. 

When he realized that even with using all of his strength, he was not getting out of Chanyeol’s grip, he got another idea. He kicked the bag of clothes out of the bigger man’s hand, materials scattering over the floor. 

“What the fuck, Jongin!” 

“Let go of me,” the dancer screamed, “You just don’t want us to be friends!” 

Chanyeol forcefully dropped the dancer’s wrist, “No, what I don’t want is for you to end up like Kai!” 

Jongin ignored the pain from the growing bruises on his wrist. He glared at Chanyeol with hate in his eyes that he never believed he could possess toward the other. 

“Sehun loved Kai.” 

“That may be true, but he’s dead now. They were in the same gang, but only he ended up dead. Sehun’s only family is also dead. That can’t be a coincidence, Nini. More death surrounds Sehun than the fucking Grim Reaper.” 

“Get out!” Jongin yelled. 

“Jo-.” 

Jongin started to shove the detective towards the door, “Get the hell out! First, you say Sehun’s a murderer, then you tell me that my dead brother was also part of EXO, and then you insinuate that Sehun not only killed him but his family too?! You’re sick! Get out!” 

Chanyeol clinched his fist, “Fine! Fucking don’t believe me! But you will come with me, Jongin.” 

Jongin opened the door and pushed Chanyeol out, “What are you going to do, Chanyeol? Arrest me? That’s the only way I’ll even come with you ever again!” 

With that being said, the dancer slammed the door shut and locked it immediately. 

He knew Chanyeol wouldn’t try to break in. He was a police officer after all. Still, Jongin wanted to feel secure. He had to stay safe until Sehun returned. 

~.~.~.~

Sehun used the spare key Jongin had given him to open the apartment door. The first thing he noticed was the clothes all over the floor. Then he saw the kitchen table set with the smell of delicious food lingering in the air. 

The assassin smiled. He felt like he was in a real home. He could really get used to this feeling. It was amazing. 

“Jongin? What’s with the clothes? Trying to find something to wear,” Sehun joked as he began to pick up the discarded materials, “I promise you, you will look wonderful no matter w-.” 

Sehun’s blood ran cold at the sight of Jongin stepping before him. His eyes were red and puffy and his sweater hanging off of his shoulder. Whatever bit of self-control Sehun had left was gone immediately. 

He dropped everything and rushed over to the small dancer. He trapped Jongin’s face between his hands as he spoke, “What happened? Are you okay? Are you hurt? Did someone do this to you? Did they touch you? I thought I told you to lock the door behind me. Why didn’t you lock the door?! Why? Answer me, Jongin. Now.” 

Sehun wanted Jongin to speak, but he also wanted to ask more questions. His mind was going wild with the possibilities of what could have happened to Jongin while he was away. Every thought made him his muscles tightened with anger. He wanted to kill someone. He wanted to destroy something, anything. He was drowning in rage. His inner beast was clawing at his core, hungry for the blood of the human who dared to hurt his beloved. 

Suddenly, warmth started at Sehun’s hands, as Jongin covered them with his own. The demon looked down at his angel, eyes locking together. 

“Sehun…,” was all Jongin whispered but it was enough to bring Sehun to the ground. 

On his knees, Sehun looked up at the dancer. 

“Please….tell me what to do. Tell me and I’ll do it in a heartbeat. No matter what, I will deliver whatever you desire. For you, there is nothing I will not do.” 

When Jongin only stared down at him, Sehun wrapped his arms around the dancer’s legs and rested his head on Jongin’s lower stomach. 

“Jongin, you are my worst fear. There has never been anything that scares me as much as you do. It’s tearing up my very soul...this love I have for you. It’s scary, Jongin. I’m so scared…” 

Sehun continued to hug Jongin’s legs. His mind was going insane and his heart was beating just as crazy. 

“Me too.” 

Sehun looked up again only for Jongin to place a single hand on his cheek. 

“I’m scared too.” 

And then lost lips had finally found each other. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sehun could do no wrong in Jongin's eyes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)

Sehun’s body reacted to the kiss instantly.

 

He rose up and lifted the dancer off the floor. Even if Jongin hadn’t wrapped his legs around his waist Sehun still wouldn’t have the smaller fall. The man’s arms were locked around Jongin so tightly, there was a moment Sehun worried if the other could even breath.

 

But that moment was extremely brief because all Sehun seemed to be able to think of was the way Jongin’s warmth filled the entire room. His skin was hot underneath Sehun’s fingertips, but the assassin refused to stop touching him. He would burn for all eternity if that meant he could hold Jongin like this.

 

The kiss was desperate at best. It was filled with so many emotions Sehun wasn’t familiar with and that confused the man.

 

Before, kissing Kai was the highlight of his life. Kai was fierce and daring. He loved control, but every now and then he would allow Sehun to take the lead. Sehun hadn’t minded though. He would follow Kai anywhere, no questions asked. He was his most loyal servant.

 

Kissing Jongin was different. He wasn’t in control of the kiss, but Sehun still didn’t feel the need to take lead. Kissing Jongin didn’t feel like another chance for someone to insert dominance. It was still desperate, however, Sehun wasn’t desperate to please Jongin.

 

He was desperate to love him.

 

He wasn’t worried whether or not Jongin liked the way his tongue explored the inside of the dancer’s mouth. He simply wanted to show that he loved the way Jongin tasted.

 

He wasn’t wondering if Jongin would be upset if Sehun embraced him just a bit longer than normal. He only wanted to display that he loved the way Jongin felt.

 

Kissing Jongin wasn’t like kissing Kai because loving Jongin wasn’t like loving Kai.

 

And Sehun…loved that.

 

Suddenly, the need for oxygen  knocked Sehun out of his thoughts. To his displeasure, he removed his mouth from the Jongin to fill his lungs.

 

Jongin kept his arms wrapped around Sehun’s neck as he caught his breath as well.

 

Sehun had to close his eyes so the temptation to attack the dancer’s lips again would subside. He didn’t want to rush things, even though Sehun felt like he had been waiting all his life to end up like this with Jongin.

 

Once he had enough air, Sehun looked up at Jongin. He didn’t know if he should speak yet, so he simply stared at the beauty. Jongin looked like a dream to Sehun, the most beautiful and wonderful dream Sehun has ever had. His mind still couldn’t accept that Jongin was real. How could something so amazing be within arms reach?

 

“Sehun, I...,” Jongin started, but seemed to be struggling to find words, “You and I w-.”

 

Sehun smiled in understanding. Jongin was just as bad with words as he was. Sehun wasn’t so different after all.

 

“Jongin,” he gently placed the dancer back on his feet and used a hand to brush some hair out of Jongin’s face, “You’re so beautiful.”

 

The tanned male blush and looked away, “Not like you.”

 

Sehun chuckled, “Obviously. But I never said I was a looker now did I?”

 

“No,” Jongin looked back up at Sehun, this time placing a small hand over the one Sehun had resting on his cheek, “Not unlike you. I said, ‘not like you’. You’re more beautiful than I am, Sehun. You’re the most beautiful person I have ever met.”

 

Sehun was speechless. Out of all the confessions and compliments he's received, not once has someone referred to him as beautiful. Beauty came from the inside, and everyone knew Sehun was rotten to the core.

 

Or so Sehun thought.

 

“Jongin…I’m not what you think I am.” Sehun had to be careful with his words.

 

“Really? Because I think you are exactly who I think you are, Sehun. There is no one I trust more than you,” Jongin trailed a soft hand down the side of Sehun’s jaw causing the taller male to inhale sharply.

 

Jongin was so close it was intoxicating. Sehun wanted to just grab the dancer and hold him tight. He never wanted to let him go, forever being at his side. That was Sehun’s vision of heaven.

 

He snuggled a little more into Jongin’s palm and sighed, “Oh, how I love you.”

 

Jongin only smiled and Sehun thought he would die from happiness.

 

Please, never let him leave my side…

~.~.~.~

It’s been a little over two weeks since Sehun practically moved into Jongin’s apartment. Every now and then, Sehun would leave for a couple of hours, but at the end of the day the two men would end up snuggling on the couch.

 

Jongin had almost forgotten all that nonsense Chanyeol had brought up. There was no way someone as hopelessly cute and fragile as Sehun was a killer. It was unbelievable.

 

The dancer continued to fold than laundry as he listened to his favorite tunes. Sehun had been gone for most of the day, so Jongin chose to finish up some chores. He felt like a housewife.

 

He smiled at the mere thought that brought a slight blush to his cheeks.

 

From across the room, his cell phone buzzed.

 

Still somewhat in his thoughts, Jongin was smiling before he unlocked his phone

.

Should I bring home take out for dinner?

 

Jongin was beaming. How could a simple text cause his chest to feel so tight? After he got over himself, he replied.

 

Aww...you don’t want me to cook tonight? Is my cooking that terrible…

 

Jongin smiled at his teasing message. He knew Sehun loved his cooking.

 

Hush, you know I love your cooking. Make dinner if you want. We can just get chicken some other time.

 

Meanie. You know what you are doing. Using chicken against me.

 

Now we are even. I’ll be home soon.

 

Ok.

 

I can’t wait to see you. I couldn’t keep you out of my head all day, little ghost.

 

Jongin’s cheeks were burning. No matter much Sehun called him the nickname, it still made Jongin’s heart pound.

 

When the other had first called him ‘little ghost’, Jongin was confused.

 

‘Because even when you aren’t around, I feel your presence. I see you when I’m all alone and when we’re together I can’t believe I’m actually alive. You entered my life and completely took it over without a warning. I’m possessed by you, my little ghost.

 

For someone who claimed to not be good with words, Sehun always seemed to know exactly want to saw for Jongin to render speechless.

 

It was like Sehun had mastered the art of ‘Making Jongin’s Heart Beat Uncontrollably, and he used every chance he got to test his skills.

 

His phone buzzed again and Jongin assumed that Sehun had hit him with another heart-stopping compliment. However, it wasn’t Sehun.

 

How have you been, Nini?

 

The dancer frowned at the message. He had a right mind to ignore the man and continue with what he was doing, but for some reason, he ended up replying.

 

Fine.

 

Good, I’m glad you’re okay.

 

Well, Sehun hasn’t killed me yet if that’s what you were wondering.

 

I’m sorry.

 

Jongin was shocked. He didn’t expect Chanyeol to admit he was wrong so easily. The detective was so sure that Sehun was a killer the last time they had seen each other. Was he only apologizing to make Jongin feel like the bad guy?

 

Ok.

 

You know, I didn’t mean to upset you so much. I only wanted to let you know the truth.

 

Jongin’s grip tightened around his phone. What the hell? Was Chanyeol going back on his apology?

 

What are you saying? You just said you were sorry you accused Sehun of being a killer.

 

No. He’s a cold-blooded murderer. That’s a fact. But I am sorry that this hurts you, Nini. That wasn’t my intention at all.

 

Jongin tossed his phone on the coffee table in frustration. How could Chanyeol be so stupid?! He still had the audacity to make up such stories about Sehun. It was absurd.

 

His phone buzzed again, but before he could read Chanyeol’s message the front door to the apartment opened.

 

Jongin quickly turned as Sehun closed the door back behind him. When their eyes met, Sehun smiled.

 

“Hello, beautiful.”

 

“Hey,” Jongin didn’t know why, but for some reason, he was suddenly anxious. As Sehun approached him, the dancer glanced at his phone. The screen was still on, showing the text from Chanyeol. Jongin didn’t want Sehun to know about Chanyeol’s accusations. He didn’t know how the other would react.

 

When Sehun turned around to place the food on the table, Jongin took that chance to read Chanyeol’s last message.

 

If you don’t believe me, check his body. Every single EXO member we’ve caught had the EXO symbol tattooed somewhere on their upper body. If I’m wrong, I’ll never contact you again. You know how much I love you, Nini. This only shows my confidence in my belief.

 

Jongin bit his lip. What the hell? The fact that Chanyeol made a deal to where one of the outcomes could be never seeing each other again made Jongin nervous. He was betting their entire relationship on Jongin finding that tattoo on Sehun’s body. He understood that if Sehun’s didn’t have that symbol on his body that Jongin would never see him again. Even so, he made the deal anyway.

 

Just what did Chanyeol think he knew about Sehun?

 

The dancer looked up at his friend. Sehun was looking through the cabinet for cups for their drinks. He was wearing a tight black shirt that only defined the muscles on his arms and torso.

Jongin swallowed the lump in his throat. Why was he so nervous? He knew for a fact Sehun was innocent. There was no use in wasting any more time.

 

“Sehun, that shirt is dirty. Take it off so I can wash it with the last load of clothes.” He hoped his comment didn’t sound too suspicious.

 

Sehun chuckled, “That eager to get me out of my clothes, huh? We haven’t even had dinner yet.”

 

Jongin let out a forced laugh, “Don’t be weird. I’m only trying to wash clothes here.”

 

“Fine,” Sehun crossed his arms over his torso and pulled up his shirt.

 

First thing Jongin noticed wasn’t the perfect abs that sculpted Sehun’s stomach, but the scars.

 

Healed scars decorated Sehun’s otherwise milky skin and Jongin hoped his face didn’t display the disgust he felt.

 

How could something so ugly be a part of someone so beautiful? Jongin hated those scars.

 

“Hey.”

 

Jongin snapped out of his thoughts and looked at his friend.

 

Sehun titled his head, making sure that he had Jongin’s full attention, “Don’t go filling your pretty head with ugly thoughts. These scars are nothing. Just a permanent reminder of the past.”

 

Jongin’s eye began to water, “Sehun wh-.”

 

“Hey, hey, hey,” Sehun was in his personal space within seconds, “Don’t you dare shed a precious for me. I deserved every single scar.”

 

Jongin tried to shake his head in denial, but Sehun’s hands on his face kept him in place.

 

“Jongin, listen to me. I need you to listen, sweetheart. I’ve been through a lot in my past and these scars are just some of the proof. But, I’m here now. I’m here and I’m with you and I’m never going to do anything to jeopardize that.”

 

Sehun smiled as he wiped away a single tear from Jongin’s cheek.

 

“My future is you. Nothing from my past matters anymore.”

 

Jongin stared up into Sehun’s eyes. They were dark and serious. Sehun believed every word he had said.

 

Jongin turned his attention down to Sehun’s torso. Without even thinking, the dancer gently ran his fingertips along the healed wounds. He winced at every rise and fall of scar tissue.

 

Sehun was a masterpiece. No matter how many scars the other had, Jongin would never believe otherwise.  

 

The dancer noticed that there was nothing on Sehun’s stomach or chest. Nothing but those scars. He smiled more to himself before flinging his arms around Sehun.

 

“I was right about you,” he cried. He buried his face into Sehun’s neck, loving how the other smelled of strength and security.

 

“Huh?”

 

Jongin pulled back and little to looked happily into Sehun’s eyes, “Nothing. Just a bet that’s all.”  

 

He pulled the confused man back into a hug.

 

Thank goodness Chanyeol was wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some people just don't know when to let go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)

Chanyeol read the text.

 

Then he read it again.

 

And then he read once more.

 

No many how many times he read it, he couldn’t understand.

 

He’s clean.

 

Goodbye.

 

Impossible. It was fucking impossible! There was no way in hell that Sehun was innocent. Chanyeol would still bet his life on that. It didn’t make sense.

 

He tried calling the tan male but it went straight to voicemail. Either Jongin turned off his phone or blocked his number. Chanyeol prayed It wasn’t the latter. He still hoped that no what their relationship, Jongin wouldn’t throw him away so easily.

 

Jongin couldn’t possibly choose a murderer over him.

 

The detective groaned in frustration.  

 

“You okay?”

 

Chanyeol sighed at the sweet voice. The other seemed to always know when he was feeling crappy. He spurned around in his chair and looked at the small chief.

 

“I made a bet to Jongin. I told him about the EXO tattoo. I promised him that if Sehun didn’t have one then I would stop bothering him.”

 

“He didn’t find one.”

 

Chanyeol noticed that Baekhyun wasn’t asking a question, but making a statement.

 

“No, he didn’t. But that’s impossible, Baekkie. He has to have one. It must be well hidden or something,” Chanyeol turned back around and picked up the phone on his desk. When Jongin’s number went straight to voicemail again, the detective’s heart sank.

 

How could this be happening to him? What did he do to deserve this punishment?

 

A warm hand was placed on his back, “Look, it’s not your fault Chanyeol.”

 

The taller male sighed, “I just don’t understand. I know I’m right. So where the hell is that tattoo? And if Sehun,  for some odd reason, doesn’t have one. Why?”

 

It seemed that his boss didn’t even have the answers. That only motivated him more.

 

“I’ll prove that Sehun is a killer. I’ll find some way to prove It to Jongin and then everything will be better again,” he stood up and fixed his gun belt. Then he hooked his badge onto his pants.

 

“Where are you going?”

 

“To find something to get Jongin back.”

 

He would not lose the other to Sehun. Not while he still had air in his lungs.

 

~.~.~.~

 

Baekhyun had somehow managed to go weeks without anyone in the gang finding out about Chanyeol. The undercover assassin was grateful. If anyone found out, the detective would be killed immediately. Followed by his own death for being unloyal.

 

It was late and Chanyeol still hadn’t returned to the apartment. He always called when he was going to our past midnight. Baekhyun was worried.

 

Park, where are you?

 

He didn’t get a reply, not even after the 6th text. Baekhyun chewed on his bottom lip, anxiously. Should he go out and look for him? Should he stay put and wait? What if something happened? What if someone found out? What if Sehun caught on?

 

The small male shuttered at the thought.

 

Sehun could kill Chanyeol in a heartbeat. The detective wouldn’t stand a chance against the Silent Devil.

 

Once the beast was released….no one could.

 

Baekhyun decided to ease his mind with a hot shower. He couldn’t afford to look for Chanyeol right now. It was after midnight, the prime hours EXO and other gangs prowled the streets. Someone would surely recognize him.  He wouldn’t risk that possibility, especially if Chanyeol just happened to be around.

 

Naked, Baekhyun looked at himself in his full-length mirror. He wasn’t muscular like Sehun, but he wasn’t soft like most people would assume. He was a member of EXO, after all. He had to be able to fight and be able to protect himself. The underground world was a dangerous place.

 

Even though everyone pledged loyalty to their group, there was always someone who betrayed the group. It was always someone who was least expected too. Because of that, no one was truly safe. Luckily for Baekhyun, he had something other gangs respected wholeheartedly.

 

Like Chanyeol said...all of EXO did.

 

Baekhyun touched the permanent black ink on his hip. He remembered when he first got his tattoo. He had been with Kai and Luhan. Since Kyungsoo was out on a date with Suho he didn’t tag along with them. Baekhyun had been nervous as hell, but Kai had not. He was so brave and it was amazing to Baekhyun.

 

Kai had been such a beautiful and strong longer, Baekhyun looked up to him more than anyone.

 

Well, probably not more than Sehun. But it had been impossible to worship anyone more than how Sehun had worshipped Kai.

 

It was unhealthy too.  

 

Baekhyun had never been a fan of their relationship. It wasn’t how a romantic at all. Kai and Sehun were more of master and slave than they were lovers. To someone who craved to have someone at their side to love and protect, their relationship was disgusting.

 

Even so, Baekhyun smiled at the couple because Kai had issues and Sehun followed his every command.

 

Baekhyun sighed as the hot water hit his body.

 

Is his twin really worth all this….Sehun?

 

~.~.~.~

 

Jongin had come to the conclusion that he would never get to use to waking up face to face with Sehun. The other man was just so handsome. Even while he slept, his face alone was enough to cause a tight feeling to invade Jongin’s chest.

 

His dark eyebrows were pointed downward as if he were thinking hard about something.

 

Jongin reached out and gently traced his fingertip along those dark brows and then continues to trace down Sehun’s face. It was like a morning ritual or something. The dancer couldn't help but touch his friend’s sleeping face the moment he opened his eyes.

 

Friend…

 

Yes, Sehun was his friend, but could Jongin still just call him that? After all, the two men had kissed. Did friends kiss each other? Well, some did, but those type of friendships usually did more than just kissing.

 

Jongin closed his eyes as if that would make the deep blush on his cheeks go away.

 

“What are you thinking about, love?”

 

Jongin’s eyes snapped open only to be met by alluring dark orbs.

 

Sehun was so fucking breathtaking.

 

“Nothing,” Jongin tried. When a single eyebrow rose, the dancer knew he failed in his lie. He covered his face with his hand.

 

“Hmissin hmou,” he mumbled.

 

“What?”

 

Jongin felt like he was going to die of embarrassment.

 

“Hmmiss in you,” he mumbled a bit louder as if the hand over his mouth didn’t make a difference.

 

Sehun sighed and grabbed the smaller’s hand, removing it from his face, “I can’t hear you properly, Jongin.”

 

If even possible, Jongin’s cheek burned even more with embarrassment. Why was Sehun doing this to him? It was literal torture.

 

The dancer took a deep breath and looked everywhere but that handsome mask Sehun called his face.

 

“....kissing you....”

 

“Thought that’s what you said,” Sehun chuckled.

 

Jongin’s eyes went wide, “Wha-. You jerk! If you heard me the first time why did you act like you didn’t.”

 

Sehun laughed at the cute face Jongin was making, “I just like hearing you say it.”

 

Jongin groaned and pulled the blankets over his head, as Sehun continued to laugh at his misery.

 

“I hate you.”

 

Sehun joined the tanned male under the blankets, “I love you too.”

 

Jongin mouth got dry and his heart rate started to pick up. Sehun said those words at least five times a day for the past 3 weeks, but Jongin still wasn't used to them.

 

He never returned those words either. He felt them though. He loved Sehun, he did. But as a really good friend. A friend he couldn’t live without. A friend he thought about every other hour of the day. A friend who he found so attractive that he sometimes had to run into another room just to catch his breath.

 

That was the way Jongin loved Sehun.

 

“I’ll go get breakfast started,” he shifted the topic elsewhere.

 

Jongin lifted the blankets and rose from the bed.

 

“My birthday is tomorrow.”

 

The dancer froze at the bedroom door. He turned to look at Sehun who suddenly looked concerned.

 

“I’ve never told anyone.”

 

Jongin should feel honored, but before he allowed himself to feel anything, he had to ask.

 

“Not even Kai?”

 

Sehun looked like he was caught off guard and Jongin didn’t blame him. He didn’t know why it mattered if Sehun shared his birthday with his dearly departed twin, but Jongin couldn’t stop a part of him from wanting to know anyway.

 

“Kai never...no. No, not even Kai.”

 

A strange happiness exploded within Jongin. He didn’t understand it, but knowing that Sehun shared something with him that he never shared with someone as important as he knew Kai was to Sehun...it made Jongin feel like he could fly.

 

“Well, we’ve got to make it special then, huh,” Jongin smiled, “What do you want for your birthday?

 

“You,” Sehun replied bluntly.

 

Jongin’s smile faltered, “What….what do you mean by that?”

 

Sehun rose from the bed and made his way closer to the dancer. He didn’t seem to mind that Jongin took a step back.

 

He smiled and brought his hand up to the dancer’s face.

 

“As much as I would love to have your body, that’s not what I meant.”

 

Jongin felt like a weight had been lifted off his shoulder.

 

Sehun leaned down to press his forehead against Jongin’s.

 

Jongin noticed that Sehun had his eyes closed as he spoke. The dancer stole that minute to again admire Sehun’s up close.

 

“I would give anything to have your heart, Jongin.”

 

Even though it came out as a whisper, Jongin heard those words as loud as a siren. He closed his eyes and enjoyed this moment they were in.

 

I think...I want to give to you, Sehun...

 

~.~.~.~

 

Luhan sat alone at a table at his favorite cafe.

 

As much as he tried to deny it, the truth of the matter was, that old habits die hard and coming to the cafe whenever something weighed heavy on his mind was a very old habit.

 

A habit that started the day Sehun broke up with him years ago.

 

Why...Sehun?

 

You’re a smart boy, Luhan. You know why.

 

But...why him?

 

I love him. I don’t like you. End of story.

 

Luhan cringed at the memory.

 

Sehun carelessly shattered his heart as if it was as easy as breathing. Luhan hated him for it, but he couldn’t stop loving him. Sehun meant the world to the Chinese assassin and Luhan, despite everything, would do anything for Sehun.

 

Luhan sipped his coffee as he thought about the events of last night.

 

Flashback:

 

Luhan had been out of patrol since he had nothing else better to do. He was just about to turn in for the night when he saw a tall figure that looked strangely familiar dip into a dark alley.

 

Wanting to confirm his suspicions, he trailed behind the figure. He froze and hid when he saw a pink-haired enemy.

 

Jimin.

 

“Well, look at this. You really came alone. And here I thought I wouldn’t be able to trust a cop,” Jimin laughed.

 

“Let’s get this over. What do you know about Oh Sehun?”

 

Jimin smirked, “Hardly anything.”

 

“Come on. You know at least something.”

 

“Why don’t you just tell me what you want to know, detective,” Jimin had a hint of mockery in his voice. But then again, when didn’t he.

 

“Is he dangerous?”

 

“Very.”

 

“Has he ever killed anyone?”

 

“Lots.”

 

“Is he part of EXO?”

 

“He is.”

 

“Did he kill Kai?”

 

“No.”

 

It was quiet.

 

“Did BTS kill him then?”

 

Jimin didn’t answer right away and Luhan found himself inching closer. He wanted to know the answer too.

 

“No.”

 

Luhan silently gasped. If BTS weren’t responsible for Kai’s death, then who was?

 

“Is that everything, detective?”

 

“One more thing...I need a favor.”

 

“Oh? Doesn’t that make you a dirty cop or something like that?”

 

“There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for him.”

 

Jimin laughed bitterly, “You and him both.”

 

Luhan rolled his eyes. What the hell was so great about those damn twins that Sehun left him...again.

 

The pink haired man continued, “What do you want?”

 

“Get Sehun far away from him and keep him away.”

 

Jimin laughed, “I think overestimating me, detective. He won’t fall easily, if at all, and I’m not risking the lives of my men for some jealous lover’s quarrel.”

 

“But y-.”

 

“However, I do know how to keep him away from your precious dancer.”

 

End of flashback.

 

Luhan took another sip of his coffee.

 

He couldn’t wait for BTS to follow through on their mission.

 

Maybe he and Sehun will have another chance to be together after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sehun couldn't stay happy for too long

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)

Jongin had never been so nervous in his entire life. 

Not when he had his first dance recital.Not when he had his first date with Chanyeol. Not even when he had his first day of classes in a new country and he only knew a summer break’s worth of French.

All of those events were nerve-wracking for sure. Yet none of those feelings were even close to the way the dancer was feeling at this very moment, standing before a glass case of assorted pieces of jewelry. 

It was silly. Jongin never had issues buying a birthday gift before. He was actually pretty good at it. He cared so much about his friends and family, he always seemed to give the best gifts. 

However... 

He closed his eyes and sighed deeply. His heart was beating like crazy as his eyes roamed the items in front of him. It was like all the gold and silver overwhelmed the dancer and if he picked the wrong item his life would be over. 

“Can I assist you with anything, sir?” 

Jongin looked up at the girl smiling sweetly behind the counter and nodded. 

She smiled brighter, “Who are you buying something for? Family member? Friend? Girlfriend?”

Jongin bit his lip and contemplated his answer, “Friend...but a really important friend. It’s a birthday present.” 

“Ahh, a special friend? I would suggest a necklace or ring?” 

Jongin’s eyes widened, “A ring? You don’t think that's too…you know...weird?” 

There was no way the girl didn’t notice the obvious blush Jongin had on his face, but she was kind enough to not mention it. 

“Not if you really like this special friend.” 

“I do..” Jongin shyly admitted. 

The girl smiled sweetly and walked over to the rings. She selected one and placed and placed it on the counter. 

“This one is a personal favorite of mine. It’s crafted with agate which is believed to be a protective stone. It's supposed to ward off bad dreams, stress and give strength.” 

Jongin examined the piece of jewelry.  It was a simple ring, only a white band with no other decorations, but Jongin loved the meaning behind it. 

Protection…

The dancer wanted nothing more than for Sehun to feel safe. His life seemed to be so hard it made Jongin sad. Physically, the male wasn’t much help to Sehun, but he hoped that the other knew that he could lean on Jongin whenever he needed to. 

Jongin was there for Sehun. Always. 

“I’ll take it. Can you gift wrap it?” 

~.~.~.~

Sehun was a cold-blooded killer, there wasn’t a reason for the assassin to feel anxious about anything. He knew that no one stood a chance against him and he was confident that after losing Kai and became even more deadly, that no one was stupid enough to try him again. 

But he was wrong. 

Someone did try him. 

Dark eyes looked at the text from an unsaved number.

Sehun-ah, I think it’s time for you to return home. I warned you to stay away from that pretty dancer, yet you have disregarded my warning. You’ve given me no choice but to remove the dancer from your sight on my own accords. 

Sehun knew who sent that text. Only one person would dare to threaten him and it was the same person who was the reason the man was the way he was in the first place. 

She had shaped Sehun into the heartless soul he was. She trained him to be a merciless monster since he was the age of 5 and when she was satisfied with the demon he became, she quickly deposed of him. 

The fact that she thought to meddle in his life again meant she disapproved of something Sehun was doing and felt that it was her place to correct him. 

Sehun put the phone up to his ear and waited as the phone rang. 

As soon as the call was answered, Sehun immediately stated his demands, “Do not touch him.” 

“Now it that the proper way to greet your mother, Sehun.?” 

Sehun’s blood boiled at the mocking tone the woman had, “You are no mother to me, Boa. You yourself made that clear a long time ago.” 

Boa chuckled, “Well, you’re right about that. Getting pregnant was the worst mistake of my life. But you had proven yourself to be a decent assassin, so I’m glad I didn’t have you killed as an infant.” 

“How kind of you,” Sehun bit out. He was trying his absolute best to control the beast within, but the mere voice of the women who birthed him sent him into a state of pure anger and hatred. The very few times they spoke it always ended with Sehun smashing his phone, abruptly ending their conversations. 

“Anyway, I already sent men out to retrieve your little dancer so your call is pointless.”

Sehun’s heart skipped a beat, “St-stop them...” 

“Oh? Listen to you. That almost sounded like a plea. Look how pathetic being around him has made you. It’s embarrassing. I can’t believe y-.” 

“I SAID FUCKING STOP THEM, YOU BITCH!” Sehun had lost it. It was inevitable and he should have known, but he had let Jongin make him think he could control his emotions. 

But no, he couldn't. He never could. That’s what Kai had been there for. He kept Sehun under control because Sehun wasn’t as strong as people thought. 

“There’s my killer of a son. You just needed a little push that’s all.” 

When the call suddenly ended, Sehun let out a frustrated growl and launched his phone across the room. He knew it wouldn’t make things better, but the couldn’t stop himself from destroying everything in sight. He disregarded the fact that he was in Jongin’s apartments and not his own, but the anger...it was too much. It caused him to lose all sense of reason. 

How could he stay calm when Jongin was more than likely being manhandled by some lowlife snakes that worked for his mother? How could he stay sane when his one and only source of happiness was being ripped away from him...again. It was impossible. He had failed Jongin. He couldn’t protect him. 

I’m fucking worthless..,

Sehun looked up and caught a glance at a picture of Jongin’s high school graduation photo hanging up on his wall. He was so beautiful. So full of the light that Sehun needed to fill his darkness. He made Sehun feel things the man had never felt before. He gave him hope. 

Hope…

Maybe...his mother hadn’t told her men to kill Jongin on the spot. Maybe...just maybe, she ordered for him to be brought to her. Knowing the sick twisted women she was, maybe she wanted to torture Jongin first. 

Sehun clenched his fist at the thought of someone harming his precious Jongin, but he didn’t have time to think. If Jongin was still alive, he wouldn’t be for long. 

Sehun rushed out of the apartment. 

He ran as if his life depended on it. 

Because it did.

~.~.~.~

Jongin couldn’t see. 

His kidnappers had tied a blindfold over his eyes so the dancer had no sense of direction. He was terrified. He had never been kidnapped before, he had no idea on what he should do or say. 

Should he try to fight his way out? No, he was weak, he didn’t stand a chance. More than likely the men had guns too. 

Should he try to bargain with them? That wouldn’t work, he had nothing to even offer them. 

So many things were floating around in Jongin’s head, he was sure that he would go insane.

Why was this happening to him? What did he do wrong? Who did he piss off? Did he even know anyone associated with gangs? Of course not. He made sure to stay clear of any suspicious behaviors. So what the hell was happening? Why was he being kidnapped? 

A handsome man appeared in his thoughts and Jongin suddenly thought about Sehun waiting patiently for him back at the apartment. He was probably trying to call Jongin, but the men had taken his phone away. 

He had no way of getting a message to Sehun and Jongin’s only fear was that Sehun would come looking for him and get hurt in the process. 

He didn’t want that to happen. He would die if Sehun got hurt because of him. 

Please don’t look for me, Sehun…please…

The vehicle came to a complete stop and Jongin was forced out and onto his feet. 

Each of his arms was grabbed and he was led into a building he assumed from the change on the ground under his feet. 

Tears continued to run down his face and he was somewhat grateful that the dark bag was over his head. He knew that he was an unpleasant sight for sure. Tons of memories and regrets flashed through his head, but his mind kept landing on Sehun. 

His dear friend Sehun, he didn’t get the chance to tell him how much he appreciated him. 

Suddenly, the bag was ripped off of his head and lights assaulted his eyes. 

“Aren’t you a pretty sight. I can see why my son is so infatuated with you.” 

Jongin turned to the stranger who was walking towards him. Behind her were dress similar to the men who kidnapped him. They all definitely worked for this women.

When the victim didn’t reply, the woman continued. 

“How rude of me. You probably don’t have a clue on what I’m talking about, huh?” 

Again, Jongin didn’t reply. This time, however, he was forced down to his knees and was yanked aggressively by his hair by one of the men behind him. 

“Ahh!,” he yelped in pain. 

“When she asks you a question, you fucking answer, bitch.” 

He must've been a second too late because his hair was yanked back again. 

“No,” he cried, roots screaming in agony, “I don’t know what you’re talking about. Ple-please, let me go.” 

His cries for help were heard my death ears because everyone in the room only smiled at his misery. 

“So weak. Crying. Begging. Helpless like a newborn infant. So unlike him.” 

Jongin didn’t have a clue on what this lady was talking about and that fact only made him sob even more. He wanted this nightmare to end. 

“Stop fucking crying!” 

The dancer was shoved face first to the floor. With his hands being tied behind his back, he had no way catching himself. 

He didn’t even try to pick himself back up. What was the point? These people were clearly going to kill him. It was only a matter of time. 

“Not too harsh now. We wouldn’t want to ruin his pretty face before that demon arrives.’ 

As if on cue, gunshots and screams filled the air. The men in the room all pulled out their weapons. The women looked amused, however. 

What the hell was going on here?

“Speak of the devil,” the woman smirks. 

The sound of men yelling and loud bangs and gunshots continued to get closer and closer and Jongin’s heart slammed against his chest at an alarming rate. 

Then the doors flung open as a man’s body came crashing through it. Jongin’s back was still facing toward the entrance, but the dead man’s body had slid in his line of sight and a new kind of fear shot through the dancer’s body. 

This man was here to kill him, Jongin was sure of it. 

“You finally made it. We kept him warmed up for you,” the woman spoke to the new presence in the room. 

Jongin’s breathing was irregular and his body was shaking. He was terrified. What did he do to deserve to be murdered? 

Strong footsteps sounded across the floor, slow and deadly. 

Eyes shut tight, Jongin awaited his death. 

When he was flipped over and nothing happened, the dancer dared to peak. 

The face he saw wasn’t of some ugly murderer, but it terrified Jongin, nevertheless. A familiar face covered with blood. 

“Sehun?” 

~.~.~.~

“You finally made it. We kept him all warmed up for you.” 

Sehun eyes narrowed as he eyed his mother from across the room. She looked so pleased with what she had done, it made the man sick to know that they were related. 

But his business with her could wait. He was here for one thing and one thing only. 

Dark orbs shifted to the body lying helplessly on the floor. Though his back was toward Sehun,  the assassin knew that he wasn’t dead from the way the small dancer’s body shook it what he assumed was fear. 

He slowly approached Jongin. With every step, Sehun regrets ever meeting the dancer. If it wasn’t for him, Jongin wouldn't be in this situation. He would have been at home right now. Probably cuddled up with the detective, watching so stupid romantic comedy. 

Safe. 

Jongin would have been safe if Sehun had never disturbed his life, to begin with. 

Now he had to deal with the consequences. His temporary happiness had come to an abrupt end and now Sehun had to face reality. His reality. One that wasn’t even half as bright as life with Jongin. 

Sehun kneeled down next to the dancer and reached out. 

Please have mercy on me….

He gently turned Jongin toward him. 

Brown eyes went wide in confusion...or denial, Sehun couldn’t tell. 

“Sehun?” 

The assassin was silent, words stuck in his throat. What could he possibly say? 

“Sehun? Wh-why...why are you here? Sehun?”

He turned away. He couldn’t bear to watch Jongin’s face shift from denial to betrayal.

He held his hand to one of the men, “Keys.” 

“Yes, sir.” 

Jongin’s eyebrows lowered in disbelief as Sehun took the keys handed to him and unlocked the handcuffs and Sehun felt like he was going to throw up. This was too much. He never felt such shame and guilt before in his life. 

Once his hands were free Jongin remained sitting in front of Sehun, clearly waiting for some sort of explanation. Something that proved that Sehun was a hero in this situation and wasn’t responsible for their downfall. 

But Sehun had nothing. No excuse. No explanation to give Jongin. 

Fresh tears appeared in those brown eyes Sehun loved so much, “Sehun….please.” 

When a tanned hand grabbed him, Sehun closed his eyes inhaled deeply. He wanted to savor Jongin’s touch. This was, without a doubt, the last time they would see each other. 

“Please…,” Jongin cried, his hands desperately tightened around Sehun, “Tell me that Chanyeol was wrong…I need to hear you say it.” 

Maybe if he didn’t look Jongin would just accept it and leave. That would have been a lot less painful. But, no, Sehun had to suffer. He had to be punished. 

So Jongin grabbed each side of his face and held it firmly, “Look at me, Sehun” 

I can’t…

“Sehun, look at me….please…” 

I can’t, Jongin. 

Sehun couldn’t risk looking at Jongin. He would break down and he couldn’t. Not now. Not in front of Boa and her gang. They would think him weak. He couldn’t show them just how much power Jongin truly had on him. 

“No…” 

Sehun removed Jongin’s hands and rose to his feet, “Get him out of here. Take him home. Now.” 

“Wh-?! No! Sehun! Wait! Sehun!” 

The assassin ignored Jongin and kept his back toward the dancer. 

“Oh Sehun fucking look at me! Just this once! Please!” 

Sehun sighed and turned around, immediately regretting that decision. 

Jongin was looking at him as if Sehun had crushed every dream he ever had. As if Sehun was sending him to his death. As if Sehun had yanked out his heart and stomped on it right before his eyes. 

Tears threatened to emerge from his own eyes and that was Sehun’s cue to expedite this meeting. 

“Goodbye, Jongin.” 

With those last words, Sehun exited the room.  

~.~.~.~

It’s been hours since Sehun had released Jongin and the man hadn’t left his old room since. 

He didn’t want to leave. He couldn’t move. No one had laid a hand on him but he felt like he had taken 1000 bullets in the chest. 

It was agony. 

He couldn’t allow himself to think about Jongin anymore. It was too painful.

He had to move on. His mother finally got what she wanted. Her son was back to being the indestructible man-slayer he was raised to be. He no longer had his weakness hanging on to his arm for the world to see. 

He was back to being all alone. 

There was an urgent knock at his door. 

Who the hell was brave enough to disturb the demon while he lies awake in his cave?

“If you want to live, you will disappear,” he threatened. 

The person did not listen to him and continued to knock.

Sehun grabbed his gun from the nightstand and approached the door, ready to kill whoever was on the other side. 

When he yanked his door open and saw who stood in front of him, the assassin lowered his gun immediately. 

“Jongin…” 

The dancer looked up at Sehun with shiny eyes. 

“What? What are you doing here? How did you get here.” 

Jongin smiled and Sehun’s heart started to do backflips. Was he dreaming? 

“Jongin, you d-.”

Sehun’s words got stuck in his throat again, but this time it was for another reason. He stumbled backward, dropping his gun altogether. 

The dancer’s smile turned into a smirk and he stepped closer to Sehun. 

“What’s wrong, love?” 

Sehun fell to his knees. That voice. 

One hand on his hip, the tanned male spoke again, “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” 

“Kai.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything has changed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)

“Kai.”

Kai held that teasing smirk he was so famous for on his pretty face. The more Sehun analyze him, the more he noticed the small differences between the twins. 

Kai wore a little makeup and dark eyeliner, making his eyes look a lot more daring. 

Jongin didn’t wear makeup at all

Kai’s hair was always pushed back out his face. He wanted to be seen...clearly. He needed a person’s undivided attention when in his presence. He wouldn’t accept it any other way. 

Jongin’s hair always hung in front of his eyes. Avoiding eye contact as much as possible. If he went unnoticed, that was perfectly fine with him. 

Kai was captivating, like a siren. 

Jongin was inviting, like an angel. 

Kai was here.

Jongin was not. 

Kai was alive.

Kai was alive? 

KAI WAS ALIVE! 

Sehun snatched the gun up from the floor and scurried to his feet. 

He aimed the metal piece directly between Kai’s eyes. An act he never thought would happen in a million years...because for one, he loved Kai, and second, Kai was supposed to be dead. 

When he finally wet his mouth enough to actually speak, it was only one word.

“Explain.”

Kai didn’t look confused or shocked, only amused. Sehun had always been amusing to the other assassin. 

Sehun’s grip on the gun tightened. 

“Right now.”

Kai brought a small hand up and knocked the gun out of his face. No one else would have attempted to move, but that was Kai. He was always testing people, daring them to change up their actions, and tempting them to watch for his next move. 

The dancer walked over to Sehun’s bed and flopped down comfortably as if he hadn’t disappeared for years. 

Sehun stayed silent, letting Kai know that he meant what he said and wasn’t going to let the other wiggle his way out of this situation. 

Kai rolled his eyes and rose to his feet again. He walked up to Sehun and attempted to place a hand on Sehun’s face, “Why are you so angry? Aren’t you happy I’m alive?”

Sehun, however, wasn’t ready to accept his ex-lovers intimate gestures, not yet. He turned away from Kai’s touch and stepped back. 

He watched as Kai’s flirty face turned into one of confusion, “Sehun? What’s your problem? It’s me.” 

“Exactly. It’s you. You’re right here. Standing in front of me smiling and acting like you haven’t been gone...for years. I thought you were dead, Kai. Dead. Yet, here you are. Why?”

Kai titled his head questioningly, ”Why? Don't you mean how?” 

”Why?.”

Kai’s eyes narrowed at the taller male, “ Wh-? I don-? Sehun, love. It’s me. Why are you talking to me like that?” 

Sehun didn’t answer. For the first time in their relationship, Kai would be the one explaining himself to Sehun, hoping and praying that the latter would understand and forgive him.

Kai let out a loud sigh, indicating how very annoyed he was with the situation. 

“Whatever, love. I’m going to bed. Come find me when you remember how much you missed having me around.” 

Sehun watched Kai turn around and head toward the door. 

Unbelievable. Did Kai really not think he owed Sehun some sort of explanation?

Part of him didn’t care if Kai left. He wanted Kai to know how pissed he was at him for pretending to be dead all these years. Part of him wanted Kai to feel the hurt, loneliness, and depression that he had to suffer through over the past few years thinking that he had failed the love his life. 

And yet there was the other part of Sehun. 

The part that missed Kai so much that his hurt to breathe. The part of Sehun who needed Kai around to feel alive. That part of Sehun loved Kai more than anything and was miserable without him. 

That was the part of Sehun that caused the assassin to crossed the bedroom in lightning speed to stop Kai from leaving him..again. 

He caught the smaller killer by the arm and spun him around to face him. The cocky smirk on Kai’s face pissed Sehun off. He knew Sehun would chase after him. He always did, Sehun knew that too. But how could he not? This was Kim fucking Kai standing before him. 

His love. His life. His everything. 

After a few moments of just standing there, Kai rolled his eyes and threw his arms around Sehun’s neck. 

“I knew you still wanted me.” 

Before Sehun realized what was going on, Kai had pulled him down for a kiss. 

This kiss was powerful, urgent, and filled with need. Just as all of their kisses had been like before they were separated. 

Kai’s soft devil of a tongue pushed past Sehun’s lips and Sehun knew he wouldn’t be able to resist Kai. He never could. 

Sehun wrapped his thick arms around Kai’s slim waist and lifted him with ease. 

Kai let out a playful squeak and continued to trailed kissed up and down Sehun’s neck. 

The taller male walked toward his bed and tossed Kai down onto the bouncy surface rather roughly. Kai didn’t mind though, he liked rough. 

Sehun examined Kai’s form, taking in the moment. The vixen looked up at him innocently at first, and for a second Sehun thought of Jongin. 

But then Kai’s eyes turned back to his sexy self and all thoughts of Jongin flew out the window. 

With a single finger, Kai urged Sehun forward,“Come here, love. We have some catching up to do.” 

Smirking at the familiar scene before him, Sehun pulled his shirt off over his head and did what he was told. 

~.~.~.~

Jongin couldn’t stop the tears from taking over his vision. 

Sehun’s men took Jongin back home safely as they were instructed to do. As if just a few hours ago they hadn’t kidnapped him and dragged him before that evil lady. 

As soon as the car stopped in front of his apartment, the dancer got out and slammed the door shut. 

He wasn’t surprised when he heard two more doors open and shut too. 

He spun around quickly, anger laced in his voice, “Don’t follow me. I’m home now. You’ve completed your damn mission. Now leave me alone.” 

The two gang members looked at each other before one of them spoke softly, “Master Sehun instructed us to walk you to your door.” 

Jongin scoffed, “Oh, did he? Well, you can tell your precious ‘Master Sehun’ that I don’t need his protection anymore so stay the hell out of my life.” 

The other gang member spoke this time, “The only thing we will be telling him is that we did exactly what he told us to do. Now do us a favor, princess and start walking. I want to go home already.” 

Jongin let out a frustrated groan and stomped the entire way to his apartment front door. 

He was surprised to see Chanyeol standing outside. 

When Chanyeol saw the two men in dark glasses and mask that had a boa on it, he knew exactly what Jimin had done. 

He quickly grabbed Jongin and examined his face, “Nini, are you okay? Did they hurt you?’ 

The detective noticed the small bruise under Jongin’s fringe. He gently brushed Jongin’s hair out of the way to get a better view, but Jongin softly pushed his hands away. 

“I’m okay, Yeollie. I just want to go to bed.” 

The sadness is Jongin’s voice broke Chanyeol’s heart. He nodded, “Go on inside. I will be right behind you, ok?” 

Jongin nodded and entered his apartment. 

Chanyeol turned back toward the gang members, “I never want to see any of you near him again or I will surely have you arrested. Got that?” 

The smaller man nodded, “Sehun order everyone to stay away from him too. Don’t worry.” 

Chanyeol noticed the sincerely in the man’s voice. He spoke of Sehun as if he wasn’t a monster. 

The other man spoke, “Yeah. He’s right. No one in BoA’s gang will hurt the little, princess. It’s Boa’s thanks for helping her get Master Sehun back under her control.” 

Before Chanyeol could reply, the two men walked away. 

The detective entered the apartment and locked the door behind him. He knew where Jongin would be. He went to the same place every time he felt down. 

Chanyeol stepped out onto the balcony. Jongin was looking up at the moon, the tears in his eyes sparkling like crystals. 

He was so beautiful. 

“Nini…” 

“You were right, Yeollie.” 

Chanyeol swallowed the lump in his throat, “I know.” 

“You were right about Sehun and I…” Jongin closed his eyes to stop the tears from coming, “I didn’t believe you. I yelled at you. I….cursed at you...I..” 

“Shhh,” Chanyeol pulled Jongin into a tight embrace, “None of that matters now. All that matters is that you’re safe now.” 

Jongin cried into his ex’s chest, “I thought I was safe before. I never thought that Sehun wo-.” 

“No one can protect you but me, Nini. Remember that,” came Chanyeol’s hard voice. It sounded more like a threat than a comforting vow. 

Jongin dried up to the rest of his fallen tears and gently pushed himself out of Chanyeol's arms. 

“Thank you for comforting me. I think I’m okay now. It’s late, you should get some sleep.” 

Chanyeol brought a hand up and brushed the dancer’s cheek, “Are you sure? I can spend the night if you want?” 

Jongin frowned slightly, “I don’t think that’s a good idea.” 

Now it was Chanyeol’s turn to frown. Why didn’t Jongin want him to stay? Sehun was out of the picture now. That meant that Jongin would be alone, which was an unfamiliar feeling for the dancer. Ever since he was born, Jongin always had someone by his side looking after him. First, it was Kai, after him, was Chanyeol, and for a brief moment, it was Sehun. 

“But you would be alone,” Chanyeol stated, just in case, for some reason, that thought hadn’t crossed Jongin’s mind. 

There was a flicker of fear in the dancer’s eyes, and Chanyeol thought he had changed Jongin’s mind. However, to the detective's surprise, Jongin simply nodded. 

“I know.”  

Chanyeol was speechless. Jongin would really rather be alone than to have Chanyeol stay with him? After everything Chanyeol had been through in order to keep the smaller male safe, Jongin was dismissed him without a second thought? Unbelievable. 

“Fine,” Chanyeol didn’t even try to contain the bitterness he felt, “Call me if you need me.” 

Jongin watched his ex-boyfriend snatch up his keys and leave the apartment. 

He let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. Chanyeol had changed and Jongin wasn’t sure that he was fond of the new man he had become. 

Momentarily leaving thoughts of Chanyeol behind, Jongin made his way to this bedroom. He didn’t bother turning on the lights and simply crawled into his bed. 

He tried to ignore how cold his bed suddenly felt. It too knew that Jongin alone was not enough to keep it warm. 

Jongin stared out into the night for what seemed like forever, before realizing that he wasn’t falling asleep as he planned.   
He rolled over and looked at the empty spot next to him, his heart constricting in his chest. He closed his eyes and held them shut, praying that sleep came to him before the tears did. 

“Jongin…” 

The dancer winced at the sound of the familiar voice his mind wouldn’t let him forget. 

Wet eyes opened and met strong dark orbs. Jongin bit his bottom lip to contain the sob that threatened to escape. He would not be undone by a hallucination. He would not. 

Even so, Jongin slowly reached out to touch the handsome face before, “Sehun….why did you leave me?”

When the dancer’s hand hit the cold bed sheets instead of on the warm flesh he longed for, Jongin couldn’t hold in his pain any longer. 

That night, he would cry himself to sleep for the first time since he heard about Kai’s death all those years ago.

~.~.~.~

Baekhyun held the small gift bag in his hands. It was a simple shiny silver blue bag but knew that Jongin probably spent hours trying to find the perfect bag for his gift. From everything Baekhyun heard about the innocent dancer, he knew that Jongin had put so much thought and care into choosing the bag, but now it was damaged, stepped on by BoA’s minions as they dragged Jongin before her. 

Jongin had held onto it for as long as he could is what Johnny had told Baekhyun when he decided to give the blue bag to him. 

‘I don’t have it in me to give it to him. I’ve betrayed him more times than I can count. I don’t deserve to see him.’ 

Baekhyun thought about Johnny’s words. He didn’t know that Johnny still cared about Sehun the way he did. 

When Sehun and Johnny first met, Johnny wanted to be best friends with Sehun instantly, but Sehun obviously wasn’t too keen on the idea of friendship. But after some convincing from Kai, Sehun finally allowed Johnny to get close to him. After that, the two could have been called “best friends”.... if Sehun had friends that is.

Baekhyun knew that Sehun would want Jongin’s gift even if he didn’t want to admit it. 

Sehun clearly loved that dancer and that meant something to Baekhyun. After witnessing the relationship Sehun had with Kai, Baekhyun wondered if Sehun would ever realize that what he felt towards Kai had not been love, but loyalty. The way Kai had warped Sehun’s mind into believing that they were in love, most criminals would find admirable. Baekhyun, however, found it sick. Sehun was obviously not stable and Kai had taken advantage of that. 

As bad as it seemed, Baekhyun was glad Kai was gone. No one needed that cold vindictive vixen whispering sweet lies into their ear. It wasn’t healthy. 

Baekhyun finally reached Sehun’s bedroom door. Taking in a deep breath, he gently knocked. After the second set of knocks, he heard some shuffling and footsteps, and then the door was swung open by a shirtless...Jongin? 

“Umm...what are you….I thought….,” Baekhyun was confused. He thought Jongin had been taken home and Sehun vowed to never see him again. So what the hell was the dancer doing in Sehun’s room so early in the morning half dressed. 

Jongin tilted his head, a teasing smirk teasing at his lips. Baekhyun was caught off guard by how similar the Kim twins were sometimes. 

“Did something happen? I thought BoA’s men took you home. Johnny told me to give Sehun your gift since you couldn’t see each other anymore.” 

When Jongin’s face turned into one of confusion, Baekhyun thought he had misspoken. 

“Gift?”

Baekhyun held out the small bag, “Yeah...guess it was Sehun’s birthday gift right?” 

Jongin still looked confused but put his hand out anyway, “Right. I’ll give it to him. Anything else?” 

Baekhyun shook his head, “No, but are you okay?” 

Jongin’s face quickly shifted into an unreadable one and Baekhyun suddenly got deja vu on a time when Kai had received news about a member of another gang sneaking around his territory. A few hours later, said gang member had been shot and killed by Kai while he was eating out with his friends. 

Jongin started to close the door, “No, I’m fine. Thanks, Baekkie.” 

“No problem.” 

Baekhyun turned to leave but he thought about Jongin’s last statement and he froze. 

Baekkie? 

No one called him that but-

He looked at Sehun’s closed door with wide eyes. 

Holy shit! 

~.~.~.~

Kai sat on the edge of Sehun’s bed glaring at the small gift bag Baekhyun had given him placed directly across from him.  

The bag had been crumbled up, obviously handled without care. 

Kai scoffed, “Some gift.” 

The assassin hated the jealousy in his voice. He was fucking Kim Kai. He didn’t get jealous. People envied him. Never was it the other way around. 

Yet here he was. Staring down as simple gift bag as if it had stolen his favorite toy. 

In a way, it did. 

This was a gift for Sehun from someone who wasn’t himself. That rubbed the killer the wrong way entirely. Who in their right mind cared about Sehun enough to buy him something. 

For his birthday? 

Hell, Kai didn’t even know when Sehun’s birthday was. He never cared to ask and Sehun never brought it up either. He understood their relationship and knew what information was important and what wasn’t. If it didn’t help protect their image and reign on everyone then it didn’t matter. 

On to another matter. 

Baekhyun clearly mistook Kai for someone else. It didn’t take any thought at all to know who. 

Sehun shuffled for a few moments before waking up. 

He wrapped an arm around Kai’s waist and gently pulled him closer. 

“Morning, baby.” 

Kai didn’t move at first. His blood was boiling. Did this cheating, low-life, worthless, no good, son of a bitch think that he could just fuck around with his twin and not have to pay for it? 

“Baby?” 

Kai shoved Sehun’s arm off of him and stop up. 

“Kai? What’s wrong?” 

Kai's eyes were fire as he looked down at Sehun. He would show him what he thought about him seeing Jongin. 

“You’ve been seeing my brother, huh?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

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**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on Twitter [Simply4fun](https://twitter.com/_simply4fun)


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